When the clock strikes the bell at elephantasourous during my erectionn i screw myself CC

People tell me im insane. Its all a conspiracy.

What happen to the boy who poured water on his head? He got wet.

alert("The Game");//

Why doesn't Michael Jackson sleep with boys anymore? -Because he is dead.

So this guy drunk guy pokes this girl. 4 months later the girl has a misscarrage.

Why was the puppy sad? It was burning alive

Why was the crocodile depressed? It wasn't; given the primitive anatomy of the reptilian brain, modern biopsychoneurological evidence suggests that reptiles feel only basic emotions such as fear or anger.

If I had a dollar for every funny joke on this site... I would have quite a few dollars. I would't be rich, but I'd have enough money to pay for me and three friends to go see a movie. So I'm talking like $40-$55, give or take. However, do keep in mind that that cost does not include the purchase of any popcorn/food/beverages.

What is next?

-When is a door not a door? -Never

Question: How many rocks does it take to make a pancake? Answer: Tree.

What's worse than getting one of your hands cut off? Getting both of your hands cut off.

Why did Chuck Norris go to Chuck E Cheeses? Because his friend wanted to go.

Why couldn't the duck get his driver's license? Well, it was a duck and as far as we're concerned they don't have thumbs or arms and are therefore incapable of driving.

Why'd the squirrel fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

What is black, white, and red all over? An interracial couple being murdered

Chayton

What is Beethoven's favorite fruit? While Beethoven enjoyed many different varieties of fruit, he found strawberries the most appealing.

What color was the fence before it was painted green? Not green.

Roses are red Violets are blue I can't rhyme coffee table.

How do you know if it's to late to turn your homework in? When the time allotted is up.

I have alzheimers but atleast I don't have alzheimers

Why don't women need watches? Because they have clocks on their cell phones because they have jobs outside of the house and are INDEPENDENT WOMEN! MEN DO NOT DEFINE THEM!

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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