What do you call two guys hanging by your window? Kurt and Rod

A Man walks in to a bar and orders a pint of lager, he notices something floating on the top of his drink so he calls over the bartender. "Excuse me, I think there's something in my dr-" The man's sentence was cut short as a man with a gun had just walked into the bar. He killed everyone, there were no survivors.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, Which is rather deceiving, Considering that the name 'violet' should naturally insinuate that the object it is describing is violet as well. Violet as a color is generally a deep shade of purple. Therefore, shouldn't the aforementioned plant, the 'violet', be violet in color as opposed to the blue color that is most widely accepted by the general populous?

Why is a black man fat? Because he eats a lot.

Wanna hear a funny story? Sure. Ok.

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead. Why did the other monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was stapled to the first. Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? Because he thought it was a game.

What did the black man say to the asian man? Whats up man!

Men's rights.

Why did the fox cross the road Because it didn't anticipate getting mashed by the passing lorry

knock! knock! whos there!?! abandoned baby!

why did the man fall over he was a loaf of bread

Why Can't Asian women drive? a: Cause they are chink assholes who have only peripheral vision

Knock Knock. Come in.

What did my mom get for christmas? My dad, Dick in a box. My dad's name is Richard.

A jewish man is sitting on a bench. A german man then proceeds to sit down next to him. They say nothing to each other.

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? The Holocaust.

i dislike sack in my mouth

Knock Knock.... Knock Knock.... Knock Knock.... I guess no ones home.

whats made of wood and floats? everything made of wood floats

Yes, finally caught that mouse!

A guy walks into a bar with a sad and depressed look on his face. the bartender says why the long face. The depressed guys think "how bad of eye sight he has my face is the average diameter of about 20 cm long"

What's the difference between a wire fence and a wooden fence? You can't see through a wooden fence

Goats are like mushrooms. If you shoot a duck, I'm scared of toasters

Knock Knock Who's There? No One You're Crazy

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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