Roses are Red Violets are Blue I have five fingers and one of then is poking at you

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How many cows can you fit in a field? It depends on how big your field is.

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Knock knock (No one is home)

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Canada

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What's the worst thing a 13 year old could do? Have their Bar Mitzvah in Nazi Germany.

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How do you know a man is Jewish? Because he told you or you met him in a synagogue.

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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Women's football

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What is worse than a Catholic priest being caught red handed raping 7 kids? 1. Thou shall not steal. 2. Thou shall be kindeth to thy neigbour... 3. Not attending to church is a sin... Moral: Catholic priests need to get their priorities straight... or gay, just not pedo!

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What happened to the guy who ate an alarm clock at 6 o'clock in the morning? He nearly died, and was diagnosed with numerous dietary problems.

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Did you hear that joke about Helen Keller? Neither did she.

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This is'nt a joke but like if it pisses you off when people comment on there own joke pretending to be someone else.

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Incey-wincey Spider climbed up the water spout. Down came the rain and washed the spider out. Out came the sun and dried up all the rain. But sadly, the spider had drowned. [L]

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Why couldn't the boy play catch with his dad? His Dad is dead.

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whats black and yellow and makes you smile? a bus full of black people going off a cliff. do you shame is? there was three empty seats.

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why did the chicken cross the road?? to go shopping for some aspirin because one of his children recently developed a raging headache and it was only logical for him to go to the pharmacy that was conveniantly placed across the road.

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Yo' momma's so fat, she has an increased risk of cardiovascula disease and may die.

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a redheaded man walks into a bar. he is wanted for raping and murdering 13 children

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Nah

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Black Veil Brides.

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Roses are red, violets are red, daffodils are yellow, and pansies are pink.

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A student goes up to the teacher because he has to go to the washroom. The teacher tells him that he has to sing the ABC's before he can go. So the boy sings, "ABCDEFGHIJKLMNOPQRSTUVWXYZ." The teacher said he did a perfect job and could go to the washroom. The boy went on to become a billionaire. Congrats!

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why did Max cry??? chicken

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why would you thank the KKK because they killed the president

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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