What do you call a woman who loves sex and food? A fat wh0re.

thumb_up thumb_down -40

whats harder than watching a dog get hit by a bus? my boner..

thumb_up thumb_down -46

Whats a dwarf running A running dwarf

thumb_up thumb_down -46

whats made of wood and floats? everything made of wood floats

thumb_up thumb_down -72

math test 2=2

thumb_up thumb_down +51

Goats are like mushrooms. If you shoot a duck, I'm scared of toasters

thumb_up thumb_down +49

Why was the baby crying? He saw a black guy

thumb_up thumb_down +49

Waiter, waiter! There is a fly in my soup. Sorry about that sir, we will replace your order and make your meal complementary.

thumb_up thumb_down +47

What's better than getting to sleep in? Sex for the very first time.

thumb_up thumb_down +47

What's the difference between Santa and Tiger Woods? Santa is a jolly Christmas figure that delivers presents to children and Tiger Woods is a professional golfer.

thumb_up thumb_down +45

Canada

thumb_up thumb_down +45

What did the cat say to the dog? "Meow."

thumb_up thumb_down +43

Two hunters are out in the woods when one of them collapses. He doesn't seem to be breathing and his eyes are glazed. The other guy whips out his phone and calls the emergency services. He gasps, "My friend is dead! What can I do?". The operator says "Calm down. I can help. First, let's make sure he's dead." There is a silence, then the man said "he has a pulse". The operator then calmly stated "we are sending a helicopter to air lift him out of there as we speak". The man got helicoptered to the nearest ER, and the doctors did their best to save him. He ended up having to go on life support for three years until his family members finally decided to pull the plug. The medical insurance didn't cover life support and the family went broke because of it.

thumb_up thumb_down +43

you know what hurts.... PAIN

thumb_up thumb_down +43

Women's rights.

thumb_up thumb_down +43

This is'nt a joke but like if it pisses you off when people comment on there own joke pretending to be someone else.

thumb_up thumb_down +41

What did the Polar Bear say when he slid off the iceberg? Radio

thumb_up thumb_down +41

2 black guys and a Mexican are in the backseat of a car. Who's driving. The cops

thumb_up thumb_down +41

Whats worse than being arrested for a crime you didn't commit? Teenage pregnancy.

thumb_up thumb_down +41

What's worse than getting hit by an arrow in the knee? Being kidnapped for 10 years and finally getting free only to find out your whole family was murdered by the person who kidnapped you.

thumb_up thumb_down +41

What do you call a black guy with a fan? An African American male Homo Sapien who is most likely hot and sweaty and is probably trying to create cold air and then reduce how hot they are likely reducing the sweat glands natural instict to create ameliorate of sweat and then make him feel better.

thumb_up thumb_down +39

How many kids with ADHD does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Popsicle!

thumb_up thumb_down +39

What did santa claus say when he saw a girl standing on the corner? Ho Ho Ho... ;)

thumb_up thumb_down +39

There are two gingerbread men in an oven and the one says " it's hot in here" the other says "holy crap it's a talking cookie!!!!!!!!"

thumb_up thumb_down +39

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops