YOLO

Why didn't Tommy walk to school? 'Cause he was in a wheelchair..

"Why is Barney green and purple?" "Because the producers of the show decided to make him that way."

How come George hit his face when he fell? He had no arms.

What's orange and hurts when you get it in your eye? An orange knife.

What did the man say to the bartender when he wanted a beer? Get me a beer.

How do you starve a black family? Hide there government assistance card under their work boots!

Why couldn't the black man sleep at night? His eye lids were cut off

AHHHHHHH OMGOMG OMG I SAY TO MY MUM SHE RUNS INTO THE ROOM SCREEMING AND SAYS WHAT HAPPEND I SAY ....................... i forgot now (k.c)

A man walks into a bar. He says ow

Y did a fat woman cross the rode? To get to McDonalds

Why did the Jew cross the road? He was hungry and there was a McDonalds on the other side of the street.

Women

You know what is better than winning a race in the Special Olympics? Winning two races.

Uh, if I say that I am that girl, am I going to be safe?

WOMAN! I am not a sweetheart at the core, I am slightly sweet on the outside and really really dark and cruel on the inside, so I can trick people into loving me before I consume them! Anyway, sure, I will get to it, first thing when I wake up, like 8 hours from now okay? Moral: Seriously? Are you hoping to see a sweetheart at my core?

How do you pleasure your grandmother? Ask your brother

Roses are red Violets are Blue Little Timmy died yesterday

How do you kill somebody instantly? Make them smell Smelly mcD's socks.

How did the fat man die? Type 2 diabetes

Q. Why did the Mexican have to go back to Mexico? A. His mom died in an auto accident and no one in her village could afford to organize a proper funeral.

What's red, loose, and easy to wear? A rock. I lie about everything.

Have you seen Stevie Wonder's new house? No. Well neither has he.

What's easier to get than a broke hooker on the side of the street? Osama Bin Laden.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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