Yes, finally caught that mouse!

A guy walks into a bar with a sad and depressed look on his face. the bartender says why the long face. The depressed guys think "how bad of eye sight he has my face is the average diameter of about 20 cm long"

What's the difference between a wire fence and a wooden fence? You can't see through a wooden fence

Goats are like mushrooms. If you shoot a duck, I'm scared of toasters

What's the difference between Santa and Tiger Woods? Santa is a jolly Christmas figure that delivers presents to children and Tiger Woods is a professional golfer.

Waiter, waiter! There is a fly in my soup. Sorry about that sir, we will replace your order and make your meal complementary.

Knock Knock Who's There? No One You're Crazy

you know what hurts.... PAIN

What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

do you like fishsticks? yes they are quite delicious

what do you get when you get when you cross a chicken and a mad scientists a mutant chicken

How many years old is Chuck Norris? The same amount of years that it has been since he was born.

Chapter 6 : The pimp ``scooby`` tells how delivered the poor young people to people with money.

Whats the difference between a blonde and a mosquito? A mosquito (from the Spanish or Portuguese word for little fly) is a common insect in the family Culicidae (from the Latin culex meaning midge or gnat). Mosquitoes resemble crane flies (family Tipulidae) and chironomid flies (family Chironomidae), with which they are sometimes confused by the casual observer. A blonde on the other hand is a Homo sapiens (Latin for knowing man), a primate species of mammal with a highly developed brain, belonging to the family of great apes, along with chimpanzees, bonobos, gorillas, and orangutans.

Why did the cookie go to the docter? Because he was dieing of terminal cancer.

Nah

Black Veil Brides.

Roses are red, violets are red, daffodils are yellow, and pansies are pink.

What do you call a lawyer who came from the ghetto? Someone who did quite well for themselves despite coming from a tough area.

whats worse than having your bike stolen? Getting raped

sdrawkcab ekoj siht tleps I whether you like it or not

What did the squirrel say to the owl? Nothing, because owls and squirrels don't talk, but the owl ate the squirrel because it's a bird of prey.

Why do reindeer pull Santa's Sleigh? Because Santa won't feed them if they don't.

One time I went into a haunted house. It was just pretend ghosts but then I saw a real ghost there. It was scary.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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