What has two feet and cant walk? a cripple

Yo momma is so fat that you should really take her to the hospital, i've become very concerned for her.

WOMAN! I am not a sweetheart at the core, I am slightly sweet on the outside and really really dark and cruel on the inside, so I can trick people into loving me before I consume them! Anyway, sure, I will get to it, first thing when I wake up, like 8 hours from now okay? Moral: Seriously? Are you hoping to see a sweetheart at my core?

a dyslexic Satan worshiper sold his soul to Santa

A married man, just realizes that his wife is cheating on him while he's away. But just to make sure, he goes into a spy shop to look for a camera to look in on his wife while he's not there. so he goes up to the shop keeper and asks " do you have any video camera's that record in on any place in a house?" the shop keeper says no and the man walks out of the store.

why was the man masturbating? his wife needed a break

Why did the cow have to travel everywhere by an electric scooter? It had motor neurone disease.

Chuck norris walked into a bar. He went up to the bartender, clenched his fists and gave him some money

Why did the girl fall out of the swing? Because she had no arms. They were lost in a tractor accident.

What's worse than dropping your sandwich. Dying of pancreatic cancer.

How do two blondes stay alive at the bottom of a pool for 30 minutes? They don't and they died

whats short and has spots? A mouse with the chicken pocks.

What is blue and smells like red paint? Blue paint!

A guy is in Weekends Millionaire. He says: I could use a lifeline. Quizmaster: Which one would you like? Guy: Anyone, I have AIDS

What looks like a jew, smells like a jew, but claims he isn't jewish? Fletcher Phillips

Sonic

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? The Holocaust What's worse than the Holocaust? Finding two worms in your apple. What's worse than that? Dying. What's worse than dying? Finding three worms in your apple.

Doctor: your mom has cancerous aids Me:*sob*

An Irishman, a Mexican and an American sit a test. They all pass.

How did the dragon get AIDS? He had sex with an HIV positive dragon months prior.

Why did the boy die at his Halloween party? He was the victim of a drive-by.

Q: You know what's better and funnier than reading all these jokes A: GLEE and thats like singing and dancing :p JK it HAPPy tree friends LOOK IT UPPP!!!

How much wood could a wood chuck chuck if a wood chuck could chuck wood?.....Why the **** do you care?

Whats worse that biting into an apple with a worm in it? The Holocaust.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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