Roses are red, Violets are blue, I have 5 fingers, The middle one's for you!

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What did the deaf guy say to the other deaf guy? What?

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A penguin was waddling along one day and saw a seal.. The seal stood up and procceded to talk and jump and even twirled around... The penguin realized this was impossible for a seal to be doing this so he hopped on his unicycle and just rode home because he was going to be late for his piano recital

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Women's football

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How did the stapeler disappear? I ate it.

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you know what hurts.... PAIN

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what did the cancer patient get for christmas. -an amputation. Luckily, he was cured of cancer due to the amputation, but died 3 days later in a tragic car accident

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See you ******* dogface! All right? You're a compulsive *********** sit on that swivel! Stop swearing!

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Little Miss Muffet Sat on a tuffet, Eating her curds and whey; Along came a spider, Who sat down beside her But was offered the window seat, Because this was Little Miss Muffet's stop

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Black Veil Brides.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it was an animal of minimal intelligence and didn't know of the underlining risks involved in crossing a high speed passage for cars and other road baring vehicles, the presence of the chicken in the road also prompted further danger for the drivers involved in the situation. This resulted ultimately in not only the death of the chicken in hand, but also caused two cars, one with a male driver aged 35 and the other with a female driver aged 42 and her two children, to collide. This cost hundreds of pounds in damage for the male driver, who escaped with minor injuries, and the death of one of the woman's children. The whole event was an unnecessary disaster.

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A Jew picked up a penny. He thought his beard matched the guy on the coin.

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Knock knock. Who's there? You're adopted.

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Who broke into the village's homes and smashed all of the vases? Link did.

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Cows go moo.

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Why was the blonde crying? Because she just watched her infant get sucked into a jet engine and she was very sad.

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Japan called... They need help.

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Your social life

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Wikipedia has no entry on "gullibility."

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Knock knock Who's there? 7. And if that's you in there, 6, you better start praying.

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What's yellow and can't Swim? A bulldozer

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A seven year-old boy was jumping on a trampoline. He landed awkwardly and broke his ankle. This then became infected and caused him to be permenantly paralysed.

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What did they farmer say when he lost his tractor? Where is my tractor?

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whats small and has four hoofs? A sow

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops