What did the dogs say to Michael Vick? Arf Arf Arf, woof woof woof

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You best friend has a bladder disease. You ask him how he got it. He says " I was watching the superbowl and had to go, but I didn't want to miss the commercials. So it was either watching the game and getting a bladder disease that would end up killing me or going to the bathroom . Now you know where i went wrong."

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Here's the senario, There are 2 astronauts kayaking in the Sahara dessert. the question is how many pancakes does it take to shingle a dog house? The awnser is purple because ice cream has no bones.

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What's big, brown, and barks? Tree

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How many Jews can you fit into a car? Well, it depends on how many Jews there are and what kind of car it is.

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What is brown and sticky? A Stick

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What's the difference between a lawyer and a shark? One is a person and one is a fish. Other than that, not much at all.

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What's up? A direction...

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Hi Jacob You cool

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How do you wake up Lady Gaga? Poker face pa pa poker face!!!

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so there are two muffins in an oven. one muffin says to the other muffin, "hey is it hot in here or is it just me?" the other muffin says, "holy sh*t your a talking muffin."

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My Japanese girlfriend just broke up with me. It's okay, there's more of them in the sea.

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Destiny was calling me, so I picked up the phone.

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Why did alfred crap his pants? because he had downs

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Knock knock. Who's there? Black guy. Due to your skin tone I feel you may cause potential danger to me and my family, so for that reason I will not allow you to enter my home.

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They give psychiatric patients acting classes in order for them to express and as such heal themselves? Excuse me fucktard! A guy that has deluded himself into believing he is the 11.356th Napoleon does not require further acting classes!

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"Have you heard the skyscraper joke?" "No." "Oh. Well I don't feel like telling it to you."

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What did the black kid get for Christmas? Your TV

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ss sa asd g dg asd g asd g sdg s dg sad g ads g s dg sad g sadg as dg as dg sdg ds gs dg sdg sd g sdg sd g sdg ds gsd g ds g sdg sd g sdg sd g sdg as sdg know i'm sayin?

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What's worse than 100 babies tied to a tree. 1 baby tied to 100 trees

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What did one mail box say to the other? NOTING! In-animate objects cannot speak...

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Why did the Koala fall out of the tree? It was dead. Why did the second Koala fall out the tree? Hit by the first Koala. Why did the third Koala fall out the tree? Peer pressure

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What do you call a drunk cannibalistic Jew? A HeBrew!

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A white man and a black man play a game of basketball, who wins? It depends who's better

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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