Knock Knock Who's there? The mailman The mailman who? How dumb are you?

What did the sea say to the sand? Nothing, he just waved.

Whats big, ugly, and sucks? Death.

A man is cheating on his wife. His wife finds out and is instantly distressed and begins to cry.

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You best friend has a bladder disease. You ask him how he got it. He says " I was watching the superbowl and had to go, but I didn't want to miss the commercials. So it was either watching the game and getting a bladder disease that would end up killing me or going to the bathroom . Now you know where i went wrong."

Here's the senario, There are 2 astronauts kayaking in the Sahara dessert. the question is how many pancakes does it take to shingle a dog house? The awnser is purple because ice cream has no bones.

What did the dogs say to Michael Vick? Arf Arf Arf, woof woof woof

why did the bear go into the woods to get shot

How many Jews can you fit into a car? Well, it depends on how many Jews there are and what kind of car it is.

What's big, brown, and barks? Tree

What is brown and sticky? A Stick

Hi Jacob You cool

What's the difference between a lawyer and a shark? One is a person and one is a fish. Other than that, not much at all.

What's up? A direction...

How do you wake up Lady Gaga? Poker face pa pa poker face!!!

so there are two muffins in an oven. one muffin says to the other muffin, "hey is it hot in here or is it just me?" the other muffin says, "holy sh*t your a talking muffin."

My Japanese girlfriend just broke up with me. It's okay, there's more of them in the sea.

Knock knock. Who's there? Black guy. Due to your skin tone I feel you may cause potential danger to me and my family, so for that reason I will not allow you to enter my home.

Why did alfred crap his pants? because he had downs

Destiny was calling me, so I picked up the phone.

What's worse than 100 babies tied to a tree. 1 baby tied to 100 trees

What did the black kid get for Christmas? Your TV

They give psychiatric patients acting classes in order for them to express and as such heal themselves? Excuse me fucktard! A guy that has deluded himself into believing he is the 11.356th Napoleon does not require further acting classes!

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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