Me: Hello. You: Oh, hi. Me: How are you today? You: I'm fat.

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-When is a door not a door? -Never

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What happens when you throw a green rock into the Red Sea? It gets wet.

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A man was walking on the sidewalk until he saw a bird. He said, "Is that a bird?", and it was a bird.

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Why doesn't Bella like airplanes? Because her family crashed in one....

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Why do blondes like cheez whiz? Because it tastes good

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What is black, white, and red all over? An interracial couple being murdered

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What is Beethoven's favorite fruit? While Beethoven enjoyed many different varieties of fruit, he found strawberries the most appealing.

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Why was the black man hanged? He was charged with piracy in the 1500s..

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How do you stop a clown from laughing? Hit him in the face with an ax.

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What do call someone who kills their own children? Casey Anthony

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Roses are red Violets are blue I can't rhyme coffee table.

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jeremie er en ape hvorfor er han det? Who cares!

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What percentage of her brain does Sarah Palin use? 100%. That humans use only 10 or 30% of their brains is a myth.

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omg this doesn't work 1.hold breath for 5 minutes 2.die it doesn't work cause you would just knock yourself unconconsiuse and your body will start breathing for you again until you wake up

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A drunk man walks out of a bar, goes home and abuses his wife.

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What does Free Candy and a Free game online have in common? They both have viruses

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Want to see a funny movie? -Watch Schindler's List

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Roses are red Violets are blue Its just a bulge I swear its not a bomb

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What's pink, wrinkly and hangs out your trousers? Your nan.

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A: Knock knock knock B: "Who's there?" A: Knock knock knock B: "Who's there!?" A: Knock knock knock B: "God dammit who's there!?" A: "Penny?"

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a dude goes to vegas and loses his money, the moral of the story is not to trust the internet this story was written by The Internet

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Y did a fat woman cross the rode? To get to McDonalds

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A man fuffers srom lysdexiea

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops