Roses are red Violets are blue Its just a bulge I swear its not a bomb

Six million.

why was the snowman so happy? because a child placed pieces of coal in a "u" shape on it.

WOMAN! I am not a sweetheart at the core, I am slightly sweet on the outside and really really dark and cruel on the inside, so I can trick people into loving me before I consume them! Anyway, sure, I will get to it, first thing when I wake up, like 8 hours from now okay? Moral: Seriously? Are you hoping to see a sweetheart at my core?

slow down! you move too fast. you gotta make the morning last. just tripping down the cobblestones. looking for fun and feeling grovvy.

The battle of Troy lasted approximatley nine years.

There's some good news and some bad news. The bad news is there isn't any good news.

How do you pleasure your grandmother? Ask your brother

Polly went out for a cigarette. Then she was raped.

How do you get all the apples off of an apple tree? You pick them

A: Knock, Knock! B: Who's there? A: Boo B: Boo, who? A: Don't cry, it's only me!

How many Jews can you fit into a car? Well, it depends on how many Jews there are and what kind of car it is.

What's worse than death? Not a lot!

"Knock Knock" "Who's There?" "Sara" "Come in, we will have a cup of coffee in the good company of each other."

who eats pencils asians

whats young and never moved? still born baby

A man is walking down the street when a woman asks "excuse me, have you got the time?" to which the man replies "Yes..yes i do" the woman thanks him, and continues with her time constricted shannigans.

what do snozberries taste like? Lama

my computer crashed because i never quit... out of anything

2 Jews walk into a bar. They have a couple drinks and call a cab to get home

How do you get twenty black men in a tiny car? Saw them into pieces.

Destiny was calling me, so I picked up the phone.

What was the beauty pageant contestant with a bladder control problem told by the judges? You’re an 8.

Why did the Chicken commit suicide Because he Ms. Reed

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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