Penis!

What do you get when you mix a bulldog with a shih-tzu? Dogs are large and solid objects and therefore cannot be mixed together.

The grass is always greener on the give me a blowjob.

There once were two muffins in an oven, and one definitely did not start talking to the other

why did the man crash a plane into the twin towers? he was a clumsy terrorist going for the sears tower

Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't.

What was the dying Raccoons last words? I don't want to die.

Why God isn't a woman? Because Moses wouldn't last it 40 days on the mountain if that was true. And he also wouldn't come back with only 10 rules.

Do you know whats not funny black jokes that arent racist. You belendo!!!

Why was the little boy crying? He had a frog stapled to his face.

A man walks into a bar. He orders a few drinks, and goes home an hour or so later.

Why did the man have a bad day? Well first of all, his wife left him, then his two kids both committed suicide, then a large falcon pecked at him genital area. After that he proceeded to be hit by a car, and soon after he was hit by a bus. Following this, his corpse was raped by a transvestite pig, and then finally his spirit got hit by a plane on its way up to heaven, knocking it to Hell.

a chinese man and an irishman walk into a bar. This is odd because these men are from countries extremely far apart from one another

Why did the asian die? he was driving

A gay man walks into a bar has a few drinks then goes home without being recognized as a homosexual.

So a disabled man walks into a bar...

What is the difference between a hore and a wife? The hore serves you...

John Hammond from 'Jurassic Park' looks like KFC's Colonel Sanders. Which is ironic, since chickens are descended from dinosaurs...

So a seal walks into a bar... ...seals can't walk.

A man walks into the local grocery store on his way to work. He stops by the pastry section to buy a bagel. As he is paying, the cashier says "and here's some blueberries, they're complimentary." The man looks at the blueberries expectantly. When they don't say anything he looks up, feeling foolish, pays for his bagel and heads off to work as a partner in a lawyer firm.

why was the boy so ugly, because he had downs

What did chuck Norris say to the docter Nothing he never has to go to a hospital

A seal walks into a club.

A woman leaves the kitchen.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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