Why do Jews circumcise their children.......because they like everything 10% off

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What did the dog say to his owner? Nothing, dogs do not have mouths that are shaped for forming words. Talking would require too many complex movements of the mouth, and since a dog's brain is very small, it would not have the capacity to hold that much information.

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Two scientists walk into a bar. The first scientist says, "I'll have some H2O." The second scientist says, "I'll have H2O too." The bartender gives them both water, realizing that H2O2 is poisonous and that the second scientist must have simple worded his request poorly.

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1234 5

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a catholic priest and a young boy

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How do you make a teacher cry? Shit in their water bottle.

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What can Harry Potter NOT see with his glasses? His parents...alive.

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Why can't Stevie Wonder read? Because he's black...

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Whats worse than a paper cut? AIDS.

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whats white and sticking?... glue, you dirty bastard

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your joke is so unoriginal. i had heard the joke before.

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what do kallum and joel have in common they both work at club getaway

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Why couldn't the man reach the police on his phone after his leg was hacked off by a serial killer? He had AT&T as a service provider.

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"Doctor," I said while poking my head, "My head hurts!" I poked my knee. "My knee hurts, too!" Then I tried touching my arm. "OW! So does my arm!" I even tried poking my teeth. "OUCH! Even my teeth hurt! What will I do Doctor?" "That's easy," said the Doctor, "I'll fix your finger right away."

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What's the difference between a rooster and a waffle iron? A lot.

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Your mother is so fat that she got diabetes and later died of an unrelated illness.

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Why wasn't the child swimming? It drowned

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Whats worse than 10 dead babies In a tub 10 and 1/2

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Yo momma is so average, she has to maintain her own facebook account...

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What do you call your fist? Trying to talk to an appendage would indicate that you suffer from mental issues stemming from dysentery or lack of oxygen, and as a medical professional, I would recommend seeing a specialist.

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Du bist mein Kampf

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Knock, Knock... Who's there An abandoned baby

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Whats worse than being hit by a bus and dying? Being hit by a bus and listening to Justin Beiber in a hospital bed.

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What did the parrot say to the cow? Moo

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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