What is worse than finding a worm in your apple? Me.

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A man was drinking vodka at his friends party. He got a headache. He told his friend, and his friend said that there was asprin in the cabinet. The man ate some. He died. He was stabbed from behind, and the blade pierced his lungs.

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What did my mom get for christmas? My dad, Dick in a box. My dad's name is Richard.

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Chuck Norris' farts are silent and deadly. Deadly because he's Chuck Norris, silent because his butthole is extremely loose

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"Billy Mays here!" No he's not. He's dead.

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http://anti-joke.com/

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What do you do when the dishwasher is broken? Fix it, call a repair man, call the landlord, do the dishes by hand or don't do them at all... your options are endless.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? The Holocaust.

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Why did the boy fall of the swing? Because he had no arms

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What do you call a woman who loves sex and food? A fat wh0re.

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Whats a dwarf running A running dwarf

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the guy on tv right now isnt funny. i blame canada

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A guy walks into a restaurant and sits down only to realize he is not wearing any pants. Immediately the police are called and arrest the man for indecent exposure. Given there were children in the restaurant at the time, the man is also charged as level 3 sex offender and is held on $100,000 bail. His family receives the news and become the talk of the town. His wife commits suicide from embarrassment, leaving her 10 year old son up for adoption who later gets involved with drugs due to his rough childhood.

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What do you call an anti joke with no punchline?

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What do you call three black men in a car? One driver, and two passengers.

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Sometimes people get confused when sentences don't end the way they elephant.

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why did little marwisheafuck want a cat for hanukock because her dad had ciilled a black priest that ate free mdicks out of a mshitfuck

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A guy walks into a restaurant and sits down only to realize he is not wearing any pants. Immediately the police are called and arrest the man for indecent exposure. Given there were children in the restaurant at the time, the man is also charged as level 3 sex offender and is held on $100,000 bail. His wife commits suicide from embarrassment, leaving her 10 year old son up for adoption who later gets involved with drugs due to his rough childhood.

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Why was the little girl crying? She got slapped with a porcupine.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I'm a schizophrenic, And so am I.

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How does a blind bit of difference differ from one that can see?

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What do you call a bay that got run over by a train? Thomas

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knock knock whos there? how should I know?

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I have 5 fingers, The middle one's for you!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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