How many feminists does it take to change a lightbulb? They can't change anything.

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No it isn't.

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One day I was hungry. I ate. I wasn't hungry anymore. Penis.

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have you tasted chocolate flavoured slurpee? no. i haven't either

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What do you call a baby who was raped and murdered? Funny

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An owl and a squirrel are sitting in a tree, watching a farmer go by. The owl turns to the squirrel and says nothing, because owls can’t talk. The owl then eats the squirrel because it’s a bird of prey.

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What did the leper say to the prostitute? Hello Prostitute.

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Ham sandwich

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If you give a mouse a cookie... ...you're destroying its natural diet. It might die.

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What did the Anti-Semitic man say to the Jewish man beside him? Hello.

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A duck flies to someone's backyard pool. Moments later it takes a dump , then suddenly flies away.

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Q: What do you get when Justin Bieber gets his own tv show? A: suiside!

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The horse said "nay."

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what happened to the chicken that crossed the road? it got hit by a taco truck

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KEVIN HART

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What did the scientist have to say about religion when he was asked by a local reporter? He said that it is a cultural system that creates powerful and long-lasting meaning, by establishing symbols that relate humanity to truths and values.

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A white police officer pulled over a black guy on the highway. The cop asked him for license and registration. The black guy had a tail light out, and was very polite and cooperative. The two became close friends, but then one night, the black guy went to the house of the white cop. The black guy brought his wife and daughter over for a dinner party, eating grilled turkey sandwiches with mayonnaise. When the cop's attractive wife asked the black guy if he would like some fresh watermelon from the patch in their back yard, he respectfully declined, for he needed to return to his own home to patiently wait for a business call from one of his employees, who was also a very intelligent and hard working African male. Once home, the black guy turned on his stereo, to listen to some calming country music at an appropriately low level of volume, as his daughter and wife had gone to sleep, for the wife also had work in the morning, at her law firm, and her daughter had a job interview after her day of classes at Dartmouth were out for the day... then Martin Luther King Jr. woke up from his dream, and was soon thereafter assassinated.

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Hey, we're both lawyers.

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A snake walks into a bar

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Whats Funnier than 24?........ 25

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A man walked into a bar. Ouch.

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What is the biggest fictional book ever made? Either the Bible, or the Dictionary.

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Your momma is so dumb, that when she took the IQ test her scores were considerably lower then average.

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no pen = no studying no studying = bad grades bad grades = no job no job = no money no money = no food no food = death DON'T LOSE YOUR PEN

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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