what did the ugly girl get on valentines? A paper bag

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Why did the Israeli military stop the helicopter raids to Gaza? They didn't. They continue them until there is nobody left.

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Your mom is so black that her skin tone is darker than most people

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YOLO

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What's big, red and eats rocks? A big, red Rock-Eater

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Why did the Jew cross the road? He was hungry and there was a McDonalds on the other side of the street.

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What's the difference between a watermelon and a baby? One of them I can whack with a hammer, the other is a watermelon.

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Q: What's funnier than a dead baby? A: Two dead babies.

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what do you call someone who kills jews? a life saver

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How do you starve a black family? Hide there government assistance card under their work boots!

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There was once a simple man. His life was far from what could be described as extravagant, living alone in a dingy apartment full of leaking taps and insects and lacking a working refrigerator. He wasn't an ungrateful man but he often wondered why life was cruel to him and prayed every night for something magical to happen, whether it be a brand new life, or even something simple like a new fridge. One fateful late afternoon as he staggered along the dim backstreet, partially crippled and pained from his standard day of labour, he came across a brass lamp just laying in the street. Glancing around, the man bent down to pick it up, knowing very well the story of the genie in the lamp having just watched Aladdin the previous night. Peering into its dull surface, he saw eyes staring back at him, eyes he didn't recognise. Anxiously, he ran his hands over the surface of the lamp, feeling the coolness of the metal on his rough blistered hands. But nothing happened! Disappointed but desperate for his dreams to be fulfilled, the man frantically shook the lamp, tears streaming down his face, wonder how life could be so cruel. Then a fridge fell out of the lamp and crushed him and he died the end.

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why did the chicken cross the street? it didn't.

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what did the scientist say in Siberia? burrrrrrrrrrilium

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Yo momma is so fat that you should really take her to the hospital, i've become very concerned for her.

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What did the sea say to the sand? Nothing, he just waved.

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Knock Knock. Who's there? Your doctor. The results came back, and you have brain cancer.

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Whats fat, brown and on the ground? A chubby indian kid

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Chicken

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What did the pet lion say to its owner? Nothing. The lion then proceeded to hunt down its owner, pin him down and rip out his insides. Besides, the likelyhood of owning a lion as a pet is very slim, and even if one did, this act would be highly illegal in most parts of the world.

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What do you call a black priest? HOLY SHIT!!!

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what happend when the car hit the wall? it exploded and 4 people were injured, 2 were bystanders

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69

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Knock knock Who's there? Knock knock Knock knock who? Knock knock

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Did you know, that every 60 seconds in Africa, a minute passes?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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