How do you put 100 babys in a bucket? A blender

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't.

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How many Jews can you fit in an ash tray? 1 million.

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So a disabled man walks into a bar...

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Why did the man have no head? He did it was under his shirt

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How do you confuse a blond? Ask her to solve ( [3x - 3x^2 +1]^744 ) x ( [- 3x + 3x^2 +1]^745 )

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That's Racist

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How many testicles did Adolph Hitler have? Two.

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who is lanky? Theo Kingdom

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Her lips aren't proportionally fit to her face

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What did the blind man say to the librarian? Hello, I am looking for books that are published in braille.

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Wanna hear a joke about a germ? Sorry I don't want to spread it! -LEts Go Mets!

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is mayonnaise an instrument?

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What do you see when the Pillsbury Dough Boy bends over? I don't know, I don't look when he bends over because I don't like him like that. He's just a friend, that's all.

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What did the Catholic Priest do to the 9-year-old boy? He ate him. The priest was actually Jeffery Dahmer.

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Why is Alan in the hospital? Because he got cancer.

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A man is on his way home from a business trip and walks into his house. He is quite as to not wake up his wife or kids. He gets to the bedroom to find his wife in bed with the neighbor. He is shocked at what he came home to and decides to file for divorce. She was a stay at home mom and loses everything because of the divorce. The man woke up from his horrible nightmare and kissed his wife on the cheek. She has always been faithful. He decides to tell her about the dream and, for insurance, emphasizes the part where she loses everything in the divorce. They happily live out the rest of their lives together.

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Hey, name is Anita, I am Nero`s nurse, he told me to say that if you wish to speak any further, you are going to have to call him and prove you are not some guy. Say Tifa, do you ever play videogames?

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How do you make a fat kid cry? You hold an onion up to their face.

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What do you get when you cross corn with more corn? A devestating force that will make you live on a rowboat and perform demeaning puppet shows you will not Even enyoy!!!!

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Your mom is so fat because she ate her emotions when your dad walked out, not to mention her history of bulimia as a teenager.

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Knock knock Who's there? I don't know go check.

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When the clock strikes the bell at elephantasourous during my erectionn i screw myself CC

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How much cocaine did Charlie Sheen snort? Enough to kill 3 and a half men.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops