what do kallum and joel have in common they both work at club getaway

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roses are red, violets are blue, i have a gun, shut the **** up.

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John Hammond from 'Jurassic Park' looks like KFC's Colonel Sanders. Which is ironic, since chickens are descended from dinosaurs...

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How many testicles did Adolph Hitler have? Two.

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whats funny? ebola and 911

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What's small, yellow and great with numbers? A yellow calculator

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What do you call a deer with no eyes? Blind.

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A man walks into a bar. He orders a few drinks, and goes home an hour or so later.

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Me: "Dad! Can you make me a sandwich?" Dad: "Poof! You are now a sandwich."

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A woman leaves the kitchen.

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Don't think of granny porn

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Why did the cow stop running? - He ran out of breath

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What's the difference between a jew and a pizza? A pizza doesn't scream when you put it in an oven.

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Womens Rights.

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where do you get virgin wool from? ugly sheep.

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What happened to truck full of watermelons careening down the hill? After panicking, the driver was able to gain composure, and shifting the truck into a lower gear, was able to deliver the track safely to the side of the road at the bottom of the ill, where he sat down alongside of the road under the shade of an apple tree, sucking on delicious watermelon.

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Roses are red Violets are blue You think this will rhyme But it ain't gonna.

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What do you see when the Pillsbury Dough Boy bends over? I don't know, I don't look when he bends over because I don't like him like that. He's just a friend, that's all.

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Why'd The Chicken Cross The Road? He Crossed The Road To Stand In An Icecream Line , Where A Little Boy Stood Infront Of Him, The Chicken Was Scared To Cross The Road Again To Get To The Other Side Because He Saw The Little Boy Get Hit By A Bus. So The Chicken Decided The Best Thing To Do Was To Sit Under A Tree , Where A Big White Thing Fell On Him , It Was A Fridge, Once The Fridge Hit The Ground Mexicans Ran Out And Then Explained To There Local Chickens What Crossing The Street Can Cause Them. To Be Dead. Moral: Dont Let A Chicken Cross The Road. :)

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Why doesn't Michael Jackson sleep with boys anymore? -Because he is dead.

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What do millions of men give their girlfriends every Christmas? AIDS.

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Why'd Sam run away Because charlie bit his finger

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Q. What's the difference between a movie star and a manikin? A. Nothing.

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What do you call a man who has no heart? Dead

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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