You might be a redneck if you are from a rural area and act as such.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

My Japanese girlfriend left me the other day... I am now depressed and have resorted to comfort eating.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

A woman went out and had a great time with her friends. Then she walked home alone and got viciously raped by 4 large black men.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she's dead!

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Steven bought an apple And then he went home and fed it too his pet Jim (he was a fish and then sadly died from being overfed)

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Q. What is green and has wheels? A. Grass, I was joking about the wheels.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Steven hawking drives into a bar Disability

thumb_up thumb_down +3

There was once a simple man. His life was far from what could be described as extravagant, living alone in a dingy apartment full of leaking taps and insects and lacking a working refrigerator. He wasn't an ungrateful man but he often wondered why life was cruel to him and prayed every night for something magical to happen, whether it be a brand new life, or even something simple like a new fridge. One fateful late afternoon as he staggered along the dim backstreet, partially crippled and pained from his standard day of labour, he came across a brass lamp just laying in the street. Glancing around, the man bent down to pick it up, knowing very well the story of the genie in the lamp having just watched Aladdin the previous night. Peering into its dull surface, he saw eyes staring back at him, eyes he didn't recognise. Anxiously, he ran his hands over the surface of the lamp, feeling the coolness of the metal on his rough blistered hands. But nothing happened! Disappointed but desperate for his dreams to be fulfilled, the man frantically shook the lamp, tears streaming down his face, wonder how life could be so cruel. Then a fridge fell out of the lamp and crushed him and he died the end.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

What did the Atheist say in church? His best friend's eulogy.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

What did Lindsay Lohan wear to her birthday dinner? -An Orange jumpsuit.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

What's worse than dropping your sandwich. Dying of pancreatic cancer.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Why did the Jew cross the road? He was hungry and there was a McDonalds on the other side of the street.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Biggest lie in America: Sorry, that was my last stick of gum.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

A dyslexic Irishman walks out of a bra.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

What's red and smells like blue paint? Red paint.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Dumbledore: Yo mamma's so fat --- her Patronus is a cake! Voldemort: ...bitch!

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Why did the Israeli military stop the helicopter raids to Gaza? They didn't. They continue them until there is nobody left.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

An iguana walks out of a bar

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Yolo: Your Oppurtunity Lies Upon...... oh, wait upon starts with a u... YOLU

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Roses are red violets are blue whats the opposite of skiny again cause i think that's you

thumb_up thumb_down -1

penis

thumb_up thumb_down -1

why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a salad. salads can't fly planes.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Women

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Why did Eve eat the fruit first? Because women are whores.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops