Not an anti-joke, but an anti-pick-up-line: How much does a polar bear weight? Not as much as you!

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A penguin was waddling along one day and saw a seal.. The seal stood up and procceded to talk and jump and even twirled around... The penguin realized this was impossible for a seal to be doing this so he hopped on his unicycle and just rode home because he was going to be late for his piano recital

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Yo mama is so fat that: it is ruining her self esteem and she worries about her health.

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Twisty Snake bite: Doctors office. Patient: Err Doc, a snake bit me in the err, private area... Doctor: I must suck out the poison immediately! Patient: What? Man! Are you sick? How do I even know if the snake was poisonous? Besides they only do that crap in bad jokes! Doctor: Yeah but this is an anti joke so drop em! Later at home: Wife: So did the Doctor help you dear? Patient: Worst doctor ever, he really sucked!

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Did you hear that joke about Helen Keller? Neither did she.

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What do you call a lawyer who came from the ghetto? Someone who did quite well for themselves despite coming from a tough area.

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A person walked into a bar, he saw it was the wrong bar so he leaves...

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A squirrel walks up to a tree and says, " I forgot to store nuts for winter and now I am dead." Its funny because the squirrel gets dead.

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how do you make money? you roba bank! :)

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What did the black father say to his daughter? you're adopted

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Your social life

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Why do they call it a clock radio?... because it's both.

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whats pink and fluffy? pink fluff

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roses are red, violets are violet

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Bob Bob Bob Bob Bob Bob Bob Bob What What the hell are you doing here

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Two cougars are at a nightclub. Suddenly, they attack and 8 patrons are mauled to death.

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Roses are red. I had no clue. I like pie. So screw you.

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RULES: #1) have fun #2) safety first

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Miranda Lorenz is a WHORE!!! She has slept with three guys while in a relationship!! then when he broke up with her for cheating on him, she keyed his car!! Psycho Bitch!!!

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What's the difference between Jews and boy scouts? Boy scouts come back from camp.

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What did Batman say to Robin before the got into the Batmobile? - Come on Robin, get into the Batmobile.

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What's 17 times worse than a 3? I don't know, personally I don't think 3's are so bad.

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Why did John fall off the tree? We were throwing rocks at him.

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Whats9+10 19

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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