What did the lady say to her child? Nothing sadly the baby was taken to Timbuktu by the father. Ps: it's a real place look it up

Roses are red Violets are red Daisies are red Tulips are red Magnolias are red Weeds are red Carnations are red Crap, my gardens on fire.

Is it a sin to love math? Cos I don't. I'm radical about it.

Why was the little girl crying? She got slapped with a porcupine.

Why did the bunny eat his food

Knock Knock Who's There? No One You're Crazy

Roses are Red Violets are Blue I have five fingers and one of then is poking at you

Knock knock (No one is home)

Goats are like mushrooms. If you shoot a duck, I'm scared of toasters

How do you know a man is Jewish? Because he told you or you met him in a synagogue.

Canada

knock knock whos there? how should I know?

What did the cat say to the dog? "Meow."

What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

What happened to the guy who ate an alarm clock at 6 o'clock in the morning? He nearly died, and was diagnosed with numerous dietary problems.

Did you hear that joke about Helen Keller? Neither did she.

This is'nt a joke but like if it pisses you off when people comment on there own joke pretending to be someone else.

why did the chicken cross the road?? to go shopping for some aspirin because one of his children recently developed a raging headache and it was only logical for him to go to the pharmacy that was conveniantly placed across the road.

a redheaded man walks into a bar. he is wanted for raping and murdering 13 children

Why couldn't the boy play catch with his dad? His Dad is dead.

What's green and has wheels? Grass. I lied about the wheels

Roses are red, violets are red, daffodils are yellow, and pansies are pink.

Nah

How do you determine the population of mexico? Send out a census every 4 years.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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