Knock Knock Who's there? Gestapo.

what do you call a Ukranian woman without a visa? my maid

What did the black father say to his daughter? you're adopted

Japan called... They need help.

A man, trying to be polite, asks his irritating coworker, "Did you get a haircut?" His coworker responds, "No, I got them all cut!" The man groans and shakes his head.

What do you call a pig with 57 nipples? 3 more nipples and you can call it a 60 nippled-pig

What did the boy do when he got locked out his house go on anti joke and make a stupid joke about him being locked out

Roses are red, violets are blue. I have a gun, get in the van!

how many babies can you fit in a bass drum? 19.

why did santa fall of the roof? Because the roof was slippery from the ice.

whats pink and fluffy? pink fluff

What is Helen Keller's dogs name? She had fish.

Roses are Grey, Violets are Grey, Everything's Grey, I am a Dog.

What does your girlfriend eat every morning that is white, warm and sticky? Oatmeal

What's red and bad for your teeth? A brick

The duck says do you smell poop. Ya says the chicken, it wasn't me It was the turkey

oh hiya come in

What did they farmer say when he lost his tractor? Where is my tractor?

How do you get a giraffe in a fridge? Open the Door, put the giraffe in, close the door How do you get an elephant in a fridge Open the door, take the giraffe out, put the elephant in, close the door There is an animal meeting, one animal doesn't show up. Which animal didn't come? The Elephant, it's still in the fridge You come across a crocodile infested river, how do you get across? You swim across, the crocodiles are at the meeting, Weren't you listening?

a man runs into a bar and screams, he is sent to a doctor for a minor concussion and receives some stitches. He recovers over time and gets on with his life.

Roses are red Violets are blue I am a cactus and you are a Jew EJ

what do you call a animal with 3 horns. a triceratops

I have no ideas.

A man and woman are out to eat on their first date. When the woman goes to pay, the man explains that he will cover the cost of the meal. That's a good thing because the woman didn't actually have any money. This happens all the time.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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