whats worse than your brother dying in a car accident? finding out the rest of your family was in there

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What do you call a dog with no arms or legs? It doesn't matter what you call him. He won't come.

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whats the difference between a nigga and a bucket of shit? the bucket

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Whats worse than getting mugged? Getting mugged twice.

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Roses are red. I had no clue. I like pie. So screw you.

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knock knock

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I cat tried to jump over a fence It was electrified

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what did the frog say to the princess? nothing because frogs do not possess sufficient linguistic skills to communicate with humans

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You know what's never heard of? Father's Day in Camden.

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Whats gay and smells like straight girls? An envelope.

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Two scientists walk into a bar. The first scientist says, "I'll have some H2O." The second scientist says, "I'll have H2O too." The bartender gives them both water, realizing that H2O2 is poisonous and that the second scientist must have simple worded his request poorly.

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I was trying to think of a joke to write, but then I became unsatisfied with my creativity and began to spiral into a depressing tangent of thoughts. I just took 37 Ambien, and have approximately ten minutes to live. Instead, I will spend my last moments writing goodbye messages to friends on Facebook and longingly looking at images of the past. Goodbye, world.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was hit by a large refrigerator Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? The two of them were stapled together Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? Peer pressure

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Albert and Hunter, Forever in love < 3

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Why did the black man die? Why didn't the black man die?

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Why did the gambling addict go into the casino? To use the bathroom

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h

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Did you see Ray Charles's house? No. Yeah, neither did he.

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Why did the black guy smell so bad? Because he accidently jumped into a pool of garbage disposal.

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What's the difference between a rooster and a waffle iron? A lot.

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Jacob Black and Edward Cullen show up at your house. You tell your best girl friend and she has you admitted to a psych ward because everyone knows they are fictional characters!

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Knock knock Who's there? Alzhiemers guy Alzhiemers guy who? Knock knock

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what do you call a dog with no legs? doesnt matter what you call him, he aint coming!

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You are short with no perm, you will never be Kat Willams.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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