WILSON!!!!!!!!!

What noise does a dead dog make ? Nothing its dead

What did the black man do when i shit in he's pant? Changed pants.

Why was Jimmy so upset? Because both of his parents died.

A: Knock knock. B: <>

A black guy, an asian guy, and a white guy jump off a cliff, who lands first? Well, newton's first law states that every massive particle in the universe attracts every other massive particle with a force that is directly proportional to the product of their masses and inversely proportional to the square of the distance between them. So it depends on who weighs the most.

Knock Knock.... Knock Knock.... Knock Knock.... I guess no ones home.

Cornbread ain't nothin wrong with that.

Roses are red Violets are red Daisies are red Tulips are red Magnolias are red Weeds are red Carnations are red Crap, my gardens on fire.

What did the lady say to her child? Nothing sadly the baby was taken to Timbuktu by the father. Ps: it's a real place look it up

What do you call three black men in a car? One driver, and two passengers.

What's the difference between a wire fence and a wooden fence? You can't see through a wooden fence

A guy walks into a restaurant and sits down only to realize he is not wearing any pants. Immediately the police are called and arrest the man for indecent exposure. Given there were children in the restaurant at the time, the man is also charged as level 3 sex offender and is held on $100,000 bail. His wife commits suicide from embarrassment, leaving her 10 year old son up for adoption who later gets involved with drugs due to his rough childhood.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, I'm a schizophrenic, And so am I.

Knock Knock Who's There? No One You're Crazy

Why was the guy on top of the van It was his funeral

What do you call a bay that got run over by a train? Thomas

A penguin was waddling along one day and saw a seal.. The seal stood up and procceded to talk and jump and even twirled around... The penguin realized this was impossible for a seal to be doing this so he hopped on his unicycle and just rode home because he was going to be late for his piano recital

What does a cupcake get for Christmas? A fat kid.

What did the cat say to the dog? "Meow."

Why does Kony kidnap infants? To create an Infantry

What do you get when you cross a dog and a cat? A hybrid animal that can never exist to do each species own genetic make-up which would subsequently reject the other's. I.E. The cat would reject the dog sperm from ever fertilizing and the dog would reject cat sperm.

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? I threw a refrigerator at it

Wanna hear something half funny 34.5

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...