Your moms so dumb she stuffed a battery up her butt and said i got the POWA!

How many people does it take to eat an apple ? One, unless it is divided into pieces for everyone to enjoy.

What do you get when you cross a cat with a giraffe? A genetically unstable animal that dies shortly after birth.

A man calls customer service. A man in India helps him with his problem.

Why did the girl not have a good New Year's? She was murdered on Christmas.

An owl and a squirrel were sitting in a tree, watching a farmer. The squirrel turns to the bird and says nothing because squirrels can't talk, and the owl eats the squirrel because it is a bird of prey.

Q: what did the deaf boy get for christmas? A: an ipod shuffle

Roses are red, violets are blue something stinks and I think it's you!

Why are Jewish men circumcised? Because it is the norm with that particular religious group to circumcise male infants shortly after birth.

An Englishman an Irishman and a Scotsman went in a hot air balloon and had a magical afternoon that none of them will ever forget, except the Scotsman because he fell out during take off and is now in a coma.

How many blondes does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Just the 1, Blondes aren't any dumber than anyone else. It's a myth.

What did Jesus say to his disciples at the Last Supper? Go to Hell.

What does a lonely man do on opposite day? Lick his dog's penis.

What's the best anti joke? this one

Knock knock! "Who's there?" "It's me, xx" "Okay, come in."

Who're you gonna' call when you're apartments being ravaged by ghosts? Your doctor, for you might have schizophrenia.

What's as bad as doing something you don't like? Doing another thing you don't like

Why doesn't Mexico have a navy? Because cardboard doesn't float!

A man walks into a bar. He is an alcoholic and it's ruining his life.

waiter: can I get you something to drink? customer: I'll have a coke. waiter: is pepsi okay? customer: is monopoly money okay?

The original Superman: Cruelty! Do you remember the original superman color movies? Like when he just deflected lasers bombs fire and bullets, he threw busses, spun around the world, was completely immune to anything but kryptonite and then... (pls dont hate) ...Fell of a horse and became a complete cripple?

What is worse than finding 10 dead babies nailed to a tree? Finding 1 dead baby nailed to 10 trees.

Whats better than finding a hot girl in your room? nothing

Why did the rabbit cross the road? ..It was stapled to the chicken.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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