Du bist mein Kampf

What do you get when Chuck Norris meets Chuck Norris? A bad joke.

cow: MooooooooMoooooooo trafic light: beep beep beep beep beep beep beep beep beep beep beep beep man:AHHHHHHHHHHH GET THIS FAT THING OF, OF ME NOW cow: MOOOOOOO (you shouldnt of said that or i wouldnt of swallowed you) man:TELL MY WIFE I LOVE HER (L.W)

Her lips aren't proportionally fit to her face

Why did the man have a bad day? Well first of all, his wife left him, then his two kids both committed suicide, then a large falcon pecked at him genital area. After that he proceeded to be hit by a car, and soon after he was hit by a bus. Following this, his corpse was raped by a transvestite pig, and then finally his spirit got hit by a plane on its way up to heaven, knocking it to Hell.

what happened after 9/11?? 9/12.

what do you call a dog with no legs? doesnt matter what you call him, he aint coming!

Want to hear a joke about my penis? Nevermind it's too long.

Frown is a four letter word.

A plane crashed. The pilot was some sort of food, like a loaf of bread or a salad. Neither of which can fly a plane or do much of anything-- like get a plane to move in the first place, let alone take off.

So a woman is in the kitchen. And she makes the most delicious turkey salad for her 4 hungry children and her husband. They love Jesus

What do you call bad anti-jokes? Suckish comedy What do you call suckish comedy? Bad anti-jokes

One time a man cut off Chuck Norris while driving, and Chuck Norris kindly excused the man's lack of consideration for his fellow drivers.

Today, we will be identifying power tools. This is not a drill.

What do you call a dead black guy? A TERRIBLE CRIME

Why was the crocodile depressed? It wasn't; given the primitive anatomy of the reptilian brain, modern biopsychoneurological evidence suggests that reptiles feel only basic emotions such as fear or anger.

What do you call a man who has no heart? Dead

Your mom is so fat because she ate her emotions when your dad walked out, not to mention her history of bulimia as a teenager.

Knock knock Who's there? I don't know go check.

anti jokes are like dogs They both rhyme with Maths

What did the homeless man get for Christmas? Nothing, he's Jewish.

Why couldn't Helen Keller drive? Because she was a woman...

Why couldn't the duck get his driver's license? Well, it was a duck and as far as we're concerned they don't have thumbs or arms and are therefore incapable of driving.

Grandma got ran over by a reindeer. She died.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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