Knock Knock.... Knock Knock.... Knock Knock.... I guess no ones home.

Why did the pig fly cuz his wife is a bitch

What do you call a woman who loves sex and food? A fat wh0re.

whats made of wood and floats? everything made of wood floats

Did you hear about the boy who got an AM radio? It took him a month to realize that he can play it at night too.

What do you call three black men in a car? One driver, and two passengers.

What did Jeff say to the guy who stole his car? Can I have my car back.

The burgler walked into the house. Nobody noticed the initial intrusion. The burgler quickly left. The family of which was stolen from woke up the next day and enjoyed a hearty breakfast of grains, oats, and barley without a worry on anyone's mind.

Why was the little girl crying? She got slapped with a porcupine.

Why was the guy on top of the van It was his funeral

Canada

what do you get when you get when you cross a chicken and a mad scientists a mutant chicken

What did the black man, chinese man, and mexican man all have in common? They all happened to enjoy cantaloupe.

Women's rights.

Q:why do bananas where sunscreen? A:beacause they peel!!haha

Two hunters are out in the woods when one of them collapses. He doesn't seem to be breathing and his eyes are glazed. The other guy whips out his phone and calls the emergency services. He gasps, "My friend is dead! What can I do?". The operator says "Calm down. I can help. First, let's make sure he's dead." There is a silence, then the man said "he has a pulse". The operator then calmly stated "we are sending a helicopter to air lift him out of there as we speak". The man got helicoptered to the nearest ER, and the doctors did their best to save him. He ended up having to go on life support for three years until his family members finally decided to pull the plug. The medical insurance didn't cover life support and the family went broke because of it.

What's worse than getting hit by an arrow in the knee? Being kidnapped for 10 years and finally getting free only to find out your whole family was murdered by the person who kidnapped you.

2 black guys and a Mexican are in the backseat of a car. Who's driving. The cops

Roses are red. Violets are red. Everything is red. I soaked it in the blood of small children.

Roses are red, violets are red, daffodils are yellow, and pansies are pink.

There once was a man from Bangkok, who hated limericks.

What do you call a lawyer who came from the ghetto? Someone who did quite well for themselves despite coming from a tough area.

What did santa claus say when he saw a girl standing on the corner? Ho Ho Ho... ;)

Why was jimmy crying? He had a frog stapled to his face

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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