What noise does a dead dog make ? Nothing its dead

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What do you call a strait man that is also gay? Bisexual.

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A black guy, an asian guy, and a white guy jump off a cliff, who lands first? Well, newton's first law states that every massive particle in the universe attracts every other massive particle with a force that is directly proportional to the product of their masses and inversely proportional to the square of the distance between them. So it depends on who weighs the most.

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What do you call a fat Chinese person? A chunk.

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Yo mama so fat, she most likely wont live to 40

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What is worse than 50 dead babies stapled to trees? One baby stapled to 50 trees. What is worse than one baby stapled to 50 trees? One tree stapled to 50 babies.

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What happens when you combine a chainsaw and a baby? 30 years to life

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What do you call a woman who loves sex and food? A fat wh0re.

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whats the difference between a baby and a watermelon? ones delicious and the other is a watermelon

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What's funnier than 24? 25.

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Why did the red head smoke a lot of meth? He had extreme psychological disorders due to years of abuse from peers and even family. He also had severe ADHD and had an extremely addictive personality type which made him succeptable to drug abuse. After years of therapy and failed family interventions, he dies from a meth OD.

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Roses are red Violets are red Daisies are red Tulips are red Magnolias are red Weeds are red Carnations are red Crap, my gardens on fire.

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Is it a sin to love math? Cos I don't. I'm radical about it.

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Why did the bunny eat his food

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Why was the little girl crying? She got slapped with a porcupine.

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Why was the guy on top of the van It was his funeral

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What's the worst thing a 13 year old could do? Have their Bar Mitzvah in Nazi Germany.

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Women's rights.

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Q:why do bananas where sunscreen? A:beacause they peel!!haha

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Yo mama's so fat that when she was diagnosed with a flesh eating disease she was given 10 years to live.

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Roses are red. Violets are red. Everything is red. I soaked it in the blood of small children.

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Whats red and smells like blue paint? Red paint.

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This is'nt a joke but like if it pisses you off when people comment on there own joke pretending to be someone else.

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Incey-wincey Spider climbed up the water spout. Down came the rain and washed the spider out. Out came the sun and dried up all the rain. But sadly, the spider had drowned. [L]

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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