What did Jeff say to the guy who stole his car? Can I have my car back.

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penis hehehehe

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what's worse than a hole in your sock? Getting raped!

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What is worse than a Catholic priest being caught red handed raping 7 kids? 1. Thou shall not steal. 2. Thou shall be kindeth to thy neigbour... 3. Not attending to church is a sin... Moral: Catholic priests need to get their priorities straight... or gay, just not pedo!

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Roses are gray Violets are gray I am a dog

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Women's rights.

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Knock knock. Who's there? Becca. I just found out i have aids, so you should probably get yourself checked out.

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Whats red and smells like blue paint? Red paint.

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Why can't Stevie Wonder drive? There is no steering wheel at the back of the bus.

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? She has no arms or legs. Knock knock Who's there? Not Sally

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whats black and yellow and makes you smile? a bus full of black people going off a cliff. do you shame is? there was three empty seats.

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Why did the bird fall out of the tree? Because it was dead. Why did the squirrel fall out of the tree? Because he was stapled to the bird

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Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she's a woman.

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How do you kill a dinosaur? You don't. It's already dead.

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What do you call a one eyed hippo? A do-you-think-he-potamus

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What did Sarah Palin say to her daughter on Christmas? Merry Christmas

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A student goes up to the teacher because he has to go to the washroom. The teacher tells him that he has to sing the ABC's before he can go. So the boy sings, "ABCDEFGHIJKLMNOPQRSTUVWXYZ." The teacher said he did a perfect job and could go to the washroom. The boy went on to become a billionaire. Congrats!

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I always tell people " I have the heart of a child! " Then I continue "It's in a jar on my desk"

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That didn't hurt.

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What's red and bad for your teeth? A brick

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What do you get when you cross an elephant and a rhino? Photoshop

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Roses are red, Sometimes they're thorny, When I'm around you, I get kind of Horny

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What does your girlfriend eat every morning that is white, warm and sticky? Oatmeal

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two guys are waiting at a train station...6 hours later one guy turns to the other and says "train aint coming"

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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