How many years old is Chuck Norris? The same amount of years that it has been since he was born.

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Yo' momma's so fat, she has an increased risk of cardiovascula disease and may die.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? I threw a refrigerator at it

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Wanna hear something half funny 34.5

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Why did the monkey fall off his tricycle? He got hit by a fridge.

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Why couldn't Larry walk his dog? Larry doesn't have a dog.

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whats black and yellow and makes you smile? a bus full of black people going off a cliff. do you shame is? there was three empty seats.

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First kid: my name is bob second kid: ok First kid: Now tell me what my name is?? second kid: bob First kid: HOW did you know???

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a redheaded man walks into a bar. he is wanted for raping and murdering 13 children

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Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she's a woman.

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A squirrel walks up to a tree and says, " I forgot to store nuts for winter and now I am dead." Its funny because the squirrel gets dead.

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Japan called... They need help.

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What is so sad about 5 black people going over a cliff in a Cadaliac? That was my Cadaliac

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A man was building a new kitchen for his wife. Just as he was installing the sink, his wife comes running into the kitchen and starts cursing. "What's the matter?" he asks. "Don't you like the new sink?" His wife replies, "I love it. But come quick, there's a spider in the living room!" The man walks over with a paper towel, grabs the spider, and throws it into the garbage. The wife looks at the husband, smiling, and says, "Thanks."

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A student goes up to the teacher because he has to go to the washroom. The teacher tells him that he has to sing the ABC's before he can go. So the boy sings, "ABCDEFGHIJKLMNOPQRSTUVWXYZ." The teacher said he did a perfect job and could go to the washroom. The boy went on to become a billionaire. Congrats!

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Why did the blind man commit suicide? Cause his wife was so ugly he went blind and become depressed a shot himself...twice.

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Roses are red, violets are blue. I have a gun, get in the van!

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That didn't hurt.

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how many babies can you fit in a bass drum? 19.

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What do you call someone with no legs? whatever their name is, physical appearance should have no bearing on someones title.

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What do you get when you cross a cat with a log? I think the better question is why are you mixing those two things together?

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If a tree falls in the woods, and no one is around to hear it - Is there still a woman in the kitchen?

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How do you make a clown cry? You kill his family and chop off his legs.

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Have you ever met a black man who wasn't good at basketball? I have, quite regularly.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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