How do you stop a clown from laughing? Hit him in the face with an ax.

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why are they called the melbourne storms? Because you turn 360 degrees and walk away

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I scream! You scream! - You've Just Been Rapped

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Q: Who won the fight of two black guys and a white guy? A: The black and white guy because two is better than one.

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Whats worse than the holocaust??having a downstndrome for a child

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If I had a dollar for every funny joke on this site... I would have quite a few dollars. I would't be rich, but I'd have enough money to pay for me and three friends to go see a movie. So I'm talking like $40-$55, give or take. However, do keep in mind that that cost does not include the purchase of any popcorn/food/beverages.

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Q. On a scale of 1-100, how immature are you? A. 69.

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If I lock you in a room and let a snake in under the door, what do you get? A problem.

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A man is on his way home from a business trip and walks into his house. He is quite as to not wake up his wife or kids. He gets to the bedroom to find his wife in bed with the neighbor. He is shocked at what he came home to and decides to file for divorce. She was a stay at home mom and loses everything because of the divorce. The man woke up from his horrible nightmare and kissed his wife on the cheek. She has always been faithful. He decides to tell her about the dream and, for insurance, emphasizes the part where she loses everything in the divorce. They happily live out the rest of their lives together.

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if it takes skill to trip over a flat surface, i have no skill...

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How its supposed to go: Knock knock Who's there? I eat mop. I eat mopwho? How my friend Cassidy did it: Knock knock Who's there? I eat my poo! Oh wait I screwed up.

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What did the little boy with cancer get for Christmas? Death

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What did the black man say to the jewish man? Hello.

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I have alzheimers but atleast I don't have alzheimers

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There are 4 people in a crashing plane, but there are only 3 parachutes. But, the teenage girl says she is depressed and cannot go on. The older woman breaks down into tears because she is reminded of her rough child hood. The two 21 year old twins start crying, too, because they were corrupted by their alcoholic father who would come home and abuse their family. As they were all crying, the two pilots and the flight attendant took the parachutes and jumped. The older woman realized she went to flight school when she was young so she took control. They were are happy and drank a little bit too much alcohol and got drunk. The pilot also drunk and crashed into a huge skyscraper. This catastrophe was later named 9/11.

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Why'd the squirrel fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

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Why did the cancerous elephant cross the road?

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Roses are red Violets are blue I can't rhyme coffee table.

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Knock Knock Who's there? Nobody, you got ding-dong-ditched

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tänk om jag inte vill läga upp en ny

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Chayton

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Q: why couldn't the pirate boy get into the movie? A: the movie was rated R and the pirate boy was only 14 years old, and he didn't have any adult supervision, which prevented him from entering the movie.

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When Life gives you lemons, Make Orange Juice!

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What do you say to a man who isnt funny You're not fuuny

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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