-Knock knock -Go away -*Breaks door and shoots*

why did the mexican cross the road? To get into America. Why did the chicken cross the road? It was on its way to warn everyone that the sky was falling Why did the horse go to the other side of the field? He liked green grass. Why did Chuck Norris cross the road? cause he's Chuck Norris. What do you call a man who gets a check in the mail every month for nothing? black

Two Penn State administrators walk into a butt.

whats the difference between a jew and a boyscout? A boyscout comes home from camp.

Why do people play video games? Because audio games are not as fun.

What's the difference between Michael Jackson and Michael Jordan? Their last names.

Why are black people good at basketball? They practice

You might be a redneck if you are from a rural area and act as such.

What did the homeless man get for christmas? NOTHING, he died.

What happens when you pour Red Bull on a butterfly without wings? It drowns......

How come George hit his face when he fell? He had no arms.

There was once a simple man. His life was far from what could be described as extravagant, living alone in a dingy apartment full of leaking taps and insects and lacking a working refrigerator. He wasn't an ungrateful man but he often wondered why life was cruel to him and prayed every night for something magical to happen, whether it be a brand new life, or even something simple like a new fridge. One fateful late afternoon as he staggered along the dim backstreet, partially crippled and pained from his standard day of labour, he came across a brass lamp just laying in the street. Glancing around, the man bent down to pick it up, knowing very well the story of the genie in the lamp having just watched Aladdin the previous night. Peering into its dull surface, he saw eyes staring back at him, eyes he didn't recognise. Anxiously, he ran his hands over the surface of the lamp, feeling the coolness of the metal on his rough blistered hands. But nothing happened! Disappointed but desperate for his dreams to be fulfilled, the man frantically shook the lamp, tears streaming down his face, wonder how life could be so cruel. Then a fridge fell out of the lamp and crushed him and he died the end.

What's worse than dropping your sandwich. Dying of pancreatic cancer.

why was the black man in jail? He stole food from a store due to the fact that his family was very poor and could not afford to fend for themselves.

Q. What is green and has wheels? A. Grass, I was joking about the wheels.

Steven bought an apple And then he went home and fed it too his pet Jim (he was a fish and then sadly died from being overfed)

A dyslexic Irishman walks out of a bra.

Q: What's funnier than a dead baby? A: Two dead babies.

What's red and smells like blue paint? Red paint.

Roses are red Violets are blue Its just a bulge I swear its not a bomb

Why did the Israeli military stop the helicopter raids to Gaza? They didn't. They continue them until there is nobody left.

Biggest lie in America: Sorry, that was my last stick of gum.

Q.Why did the chicken cross the road? A.forty-two

An iguana walks out of a bar

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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