A robbery occurred at Temple University, the perpetrator is an African-American male, 5'11", wearing jeans and a black sweatshirt. Be on the look out and notify the police if seen

Tennesse

whats pink and fluffy? pink fluff. whats blue and fluffy? pink fluff holding its breath.

why are they called the melbourne storms? Because you turn 360 degrees and walk away

*you're

Why did the chicken cross the road? To escape her abusive father

Frown is a four letter word.

What is green and red all over? The Hulk's Penis in a blender

im a selling a car

A blonde read the newspaper the other day and she saw "Sarah Piplin-laid by 5000 men" She reported it to the owner of the company as I felt it was not appropriate for a family newspaper. The person at the other end of the line asked the blonde, "are you blonde?" "Yes, how do you know?" she replied. "Because it says Sahara Pipeline, you idiot!"

Why can't Hellen Keller drive? Because she is dead.

How do you make Lady Gaga cry? You set her on fire.

A man walks into a doctor's office and says, "Doctor, help! My hair is falling out! I need something to keep it in!" The doctor says, "sure. Here's some medicine."

An elephant and a rabbit sit on the forest floor and poop. The elephant asks the rabbit " doesn't it annoy you when the poop sticks to your fur?" "no" replies the rabbit. So the elephant picks up the rabbit and wipes his but with him.

Why couldn't the duck get his driver's license? Well, it was a duck and as far as we're concerned they don't have thumbs or arms and are therefore incapable of driving.

whats the difference between a jew and a boyscout? A boyscout comes home from camp.

Hey, we're both lawyers.

-Knock knock -Go away -*Breaks door and shoots*

If I lock you in a room and let a snake in under the door, what do you get? A problem.

A man is on his way home from a business trip and walks into his house. He is quite as to not wake up his wife or kids. He gets to the bedroom to find his wife in bed with the neighbor. He is shocked at what he came home to and decides to file for divorce. She was a stay at home mom and loses everything because of the divorce. The man woke up from his horrible nightmare and kissed his wife on the cheek. She has always been faithful. He decides to tell her about the dream and, for insurance, emphasizes the part where she loses everything in the divorce. They happily live out the rest of their lives together.

Teacher- "Sally Sue, a sentence that starts with I, please."\ Sally Sue- "I is..." Teacher- "no, no, Sally Sue, when you start with I, you must follow it with am." Sally Sue- "I am the 9th letter of the alphebet."

Norm Macdonald's roast of Bob Saget.

Roses are red Violets are blue I can't rhyme coffee table.

What does the Jewish man and the Atheist have in common? They both believe in a god. Except the Atheist.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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