Three kids are standing on a corner. They have red hair, blue hair, and green hair respectively. A man asks the kid with red hair "How did you get your hair red?" The kid replies, "I dyed it." The man then asks the kid with blue hair, "How did you get your hair blue?" The kid replies, "I dyed it." The man finally asks the kid with green hair, "How did you get your hair green?" The kid wipes his hand across his nose, gathering green slime and replies, "I dyed it."

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I am not racist, racism is a crime! Crime is for black people.

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How is it possible for a man to get raped? Easy. He lied.

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why did the cookie go to the docter he felt crumpie

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Three children are celebrating Christmas, Joey got a toy train, Janey got a barbie doll, Know what Jimmy got??? Cancer.

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di you hear about the man that got his whole left side cut off? no well he died

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why was the horse sad his wife had terminal cancer

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A soccer player, a basketball player, a football player, a hockey player, and a baseball player all walk into a bar at different time periods of the day

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Why can't Amy Winehouse drive? She is dead.

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Q: What do you call a plane with no wings? A: An unfinished plane.

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Q: What did Mr. Spock say when Captain Kirk was raping him? A: "Ouch! Ouch! Captain, this is so illogical!"

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Dude? What. Dude? What! Wheres my car?

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What is the way to a woman's heart? Through her chest cavity.

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What did the 85 year old man do after having the sex of his life? He found out he had AIDS.

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Why did Jimmy fail his math test? Because he had a mental disability

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why did the man scream? he stubbed his toe on a door

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what is a big jar and has a human in it? A human in a jar.

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Chuck Norris.

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How do you get an elephant in pajamas? Elephants are large mammals with several layers of body fat, and pajamas are for humans. there is no purpose in attempting this feat at all.

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What do you call a dumb Asian? An Asian who lacks education.

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Homework.

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Two black guys jump off of a building; who falls first? The one that jumped first

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Why does a ginger have no friends? Because it is a non sentient horizontal stem and thus incapable of forming complex social and emotional bonds with conscious organisms.

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Trust me im a doctor but this is pratice

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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