Why do black people call white people "Niggas"? Because they took an overdose of KFC and watermelon, they're actually just insulting themselves.

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how do you make a plumber cry Kill his family

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What's the difference between jelly and jam? Jelly doesn't contain pieces of fruit.

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what do u call a person who reads anti.jokes a hipster

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A Priest, a Rabbi, and an Orca Whale walk into a local eatery to discuss what is on their mind. The Priest says he is proud that even though their community is comprised of people residing in many different religions, they still work together to strive for a better tomorrow. The Rabbi nods his head in agreement,he states that he is proud of all the hard working men in their community that are willing to make sacrifices for the needy. The Orca Whale also nods in agreement and pauses for a moment to think while he insight-fully gleams at his two other friends. The Mighty Orca Whale then contributes to the conversation by saying eeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuurrrr!

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what did the frog say to the princess? nothing because frogs do not possess sufficient linguistic skills to communicate with humans

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Why are we on a roof? Becuse some idiot gave us all roofies.

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That guy is so lame, he needs a wheelchair to go places.

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What's the same between a plane a bird and a piece of celery? They all fly except the celery

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How many blonds does it take to kidnap a child? One.

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A guy walks into a bar. He puts an icepack on his head so it doesn't swell, and decides to go out for a drink. He walks into a bar and thinks to himself, "that's twice today, maybe I should just go home."

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Why did the man float in the lake? Because he had more fat than average, so he was very buoyant

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What's funnier than a dead baby? A dead baby in a clown suit

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Knock Knock Who is it? Me, I forgot my keys on the way out oh ok...

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Q:Why did the man rob the bank? A:He needed money.... duhhh -Ryan Vallee

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I wish you were here, To get to the other side!

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What do you call a muslim behind the controls of an airliner? A pilot you rascist.

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Why do white people wear black shirts? Why do black people wear white shirts?

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When life gives you lemons...you probably just found lemons.

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That's Racist

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Q:Why couldn't the baby walk down the hall way? A: It had a javelin stuck in its head.

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What did the homosexual say to the purse walking down the street? - I'm a homosexual.

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What's worse than getting one of your hands cut off? Getting both of your hands cut off.

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How do you get a guitar player to play softer? Ask them politely to turn down their volume.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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