what happened after 9/11?? 9/12.

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How did the dead baby cross the road? stapled to the chickens foot.

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ABCDEFGHIJKLMNOPQRSUCKMYDICK

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Frown is a four letter word.

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What is the answer to the universe? I would tell you but you would get board.

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How are cherries and kittens different? They're both fun to cut up.

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On the first day of Christmas, my true love gave to me... Nothing, because I'm single.

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Whats long and hard on a black man..... 2nd grade

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Why do people always walk so slow when your in a rush to get somewhere? They don't it just seems like that

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Mary had a little lamb, the doctor fainted.

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So a seal walks into a bar... ...seals can't walk.

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So a woman is in the kitchen. And she makes the most delicious turkey salad for her 4 hungry children and her husband. They love Jesus

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ugh good riddance

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A police man, doctor and stage actor walk into a bar. They're identifying the corpse of the stage actor's brother.

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How do you wake up Lady Gaga? Say, "Wake up!"

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An Asian woman is driving home from work. She gets in an accident and is killed instantly. Her family is traumatized.

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Martin Luther King Jr. had a dream..... But Leonardo DiCaprio had a dream within a dream within a dream within a dream.

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A man is on his way home from a business trip and walks into his house. He is quite as to not wake up his wife or kids. He gets to the bedroom to find his wife in bed with the neighbor. He is shocked at what he came home to and decides to file for divorce. She was a stay at home mom and loses everything because of the divorce. The man woke up from his horrible nightmare and kissed his wife on the cheek. She has always been faithful. He decides to tell her about the dream and, for insurance, emphasizes the part where she loses everything in the divorce. They happily live out the rest of their lives together.

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Bert: Hey, what you got there? Sal: Nothing.

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If I lock you in a room and let a snake in under the door, what do you get? A problem.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I'm horny and your bodily figure is very attractive Get naked

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What do you call a man who has no heart? Dead

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Two Penn State administrators walk into a butt.

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Why was the crocodile depressed? It wasn't; given the primitive anatomy of the reptilian brain, modern biopsychoneurological evidence suggests that reptiles feel only basic emotions such as fear or anger.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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