A man walked into a bar and it hurt.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Hey guys wanna here a joke? Never mind it was a gay joke but f**k it.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

What's worse than getting one of your hands cut off? Getting both of your hands cut off.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

What did chuck Norris say to the docter Nothing he never has to go to a hospital

thumb_up thumb_down +12

what is the difference between a Jew and a pizza? -one is the chosen people of Isreal and one is a food that was founded in Italy

thumb_up thumb_down +10

-Knock knock -Go away -*Breaks door and shoots*

thumb_up thumb_down +10

JESUS SAYS PICTURE HERE ..... Throws a party for 12 people the world still talks about 2012 years latter !

thumb_up thumb_down +10

What happens when you throw a green rock into the Red Sea? It gets wet.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

anti jokes are like dogs They both rhyme with Maths

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Where do rabbais go to shop? At the supermarket like everyone else.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

How do you know if it's to late to turn your homework in? When the time allotted is up.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

why did the mexican cross the road? To get into America. Why did the chicken cross the road? It was on its way to warn everyone that the sky was falling Why did the horse go to the other side of the field? He liked green grass. Why did Chuck Norris cross the road? cause he's Chuck Norris. What do you call a man who gets a check in the mail every month for nothing? black

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Why do people play video games? Because audio games are not as fun.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

What's the sound of victory? The sound of a knife cutting into a baby.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Why can't the dinosaur eat M&M's? He is dead. He used to rule the Earth 65 Million years ago, though. Dinosaurs are reptiles. Whales are not. Meow?

thumb_up thumb_down +8

What's the difference between black people and dog shit? One of them eventually turns white and stops smelling.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Whats the different between a black man and white man...... the different levels melanin in the skin that results in pigment

thumb_up thumb_down +6

What did the apple say to the orange? Nothing. Fruits can't talk.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

the website says jokes, yet these are all facts.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Why did the tree cross the road? A woman crashed into it.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Why did the manager fire his black employee? Because he was stealing office supplies. Why was he stealing office supplies? Because he needed the money for his family. Why did he need that money? Because he wasn't being paid his full wage. Why wasn't he being paid full wage? Because his employer was a racist. Upon this analysis, the state of California ruled the case of Jones vs. Smith in favour of Mr. Jones, and ordered Mr. Smith to give Mr. Jones a cash settlement of $500,000. However, Mr. Jones was still convicted with a single charge of petty theft and was sentenced to six months in prison. His family was still awarded the settlement of $500,000. Mr. Jones made parole three months early for being an "idol inmate."

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Why did Jimmy fail his math test? Because he had a mental disability

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Funny joke to play on an elderly woman: Take her cane and push her In front of a bus.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Why did the chicken cross the road? It had the utmost desire to.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops