Why was the boy with a green and blue collared shirt holding a bottle of rice dead at the bottom of the sea? Because he was pushed of a boat and couldn't swim.

Did you know Helen Keller had a swingset in her backyard Neither did she.

What's the difference between a Elephant? It can neither bike...

Roses are red, violets are blue, I ate your horse.

your mom is so black that it can be assumed she is of african descent

Q: How do you get a kleenex to dance? A: Put a little boogey in it!

Trust me im a doctor but this is pratice

Hey, name is Anita, I am Nero`s nurse, he told me to say that if you wish to speak any further, you are going to have to call him and prove you are not some guy. Say Tifa, do you ever play videogames?

What did the Ethiopian get for christmas? Hepatitis B.

"Knock Knock." "Who's there?" "Banana." "Banana who?" "Knock Knock." "Who's there?" "Banana." "I already asked ''Banana who?'' Is that your real name? Who is this really?" "Knock Knock." "You are upsetting me. I am calling the police now. Please get off my property."

An Irishman, a Mexican and an American sit a test. They all pass.

whats worse than stubbing your toe? being gang raped and then killed

chuck norris's tears cure cancer, to bad chuck norris never cries

1500 Jews were ordered to walk along a straight path whilst in the midst of a blizzard. How close did they ever get to the end? What end? They marched until every last bit of their rotten flesh was driven from their weak bodies. --ZeNaziGermanDoctor

Why did the man get hit by a van? He was blind, and his guide dog was an idiot.

The battle of Troy lasted approximatley nine years.

Woman: If you were my husband, I've give you poisoned wine. Winston Churchill: Madame, if you were my wife, I would hope we could have enough love to attempt marriage counseling so as to work out these issues.

How do you piss off a female archeologist? Kill her dog.

A drunk man walks out of a bar, goes home and abuses his wife.

Polly went out for a cigarette. Then she was raped.

Yo momma is so fat that you should really take her to the hospital, i've become very concerned for her.

knock knock whos there a duck a duck who QUACK!

Why was the boy sad? He had a Ford Taurus stapled to his face.

Why Was my mommy gone last night? -cause I ****ed her

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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