Three children are celebrating Christmas, Joey got a toy train, Janey got a barbie doll, Know what Jimmy got??? Cancer.

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There is a knock on the door. Little Jimmy comes dowstairs opens the door and standing in the door way is the axe wielding manic fromTexas Chainsaw.

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How is it possible for a man to get raped? Easy. He lied.

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What did Lindsay Lohan wear to her birthday dinner? -An Orange jumpsuit.

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Is this a chair?

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Where did Lucy go after being hit by a train? Well, the results of this question are somewhat difficult to pinpoint, but here is a generalized ratio model. 47% of Lucy went underneath the trains wheels and was left behind, crushed into the railway sleepers. 33% was thrown aside and discarded around the SIDES of the track. 19% was carried on the front of the train, into the next station where it fell off as soon as the train stopped. 1% was found in Mount Everest.

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What did the little girls who's parents died in a car accident get for her birthday? Foster Parents

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What walks like a duck, talks like a duck, but doesn't look like a duck? A horse named Quackie

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Q: What did Mr. Spock say when Captain Kirk was raping him? A: "Ouch! Ouch! Captain, this is so illogical!"

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A Muslim get's on a plain. He is heading to Spain, and has a lovely time.

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Steven bought an apple And then he went home and fed it too his pet Jim (he was a fish and then sadly died from being overfed)

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Why Do Indians Not Like Snow? Because it is white and on their land

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Did you know Dr Pepper isn't really a doctor?

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Star Wars

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Why did the Israeli military stop the helicopter raids to Gaza? They didn't. They continue them until there is nobody left.

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Not at all, I find your perception of things like that quite pleasing, you obviously care about me, and care about your wife, that's nice.

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Whats brown and sticky? Anal sex

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What's big, red and eats rocks? A big, red Rock-Eater

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What is the way to a woman's heart? Through her chest cavity.

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A: Knock knock knock B: "Who's there?" A: Knock knock knock B: "Who's there!?" A: Knock knock knock B: "God dammit who's there!?" A: "Penny?"

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A fire at a chinese high school caused the death of many children. The drill was unsucessful.

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What did the man say to the bartender when he wanted a beer? Get me a beer.

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What do you call a horse and a donkey mixed together? A mule.

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Why did your mum have sex with my mum? Because they're lesbian.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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