Stephen Hawkings walks into a bar and orders a beer. Just kidding, he can't walk.

What's easier to get than a broke prostitute on the side of the street? Osama Bin Laden.

what do you get when you throw a refrigerator at a boy on a bike? a severely injured boy, a lawsuit , a police record and a prison mate

Why can't helen keller skii? Because she's dead

Why did the baby cross the road? His parents were drug addicts, and didn't pay him any attention.

Hello

Roses are red, violets are blue That's a fact.

Why did the girl fall off the swing? Because she didn't have any arms.

How many people with ADD does it take to...Oh look! Shiny!!!

What is worse than getting a virus on your computer? Having your mother die of malaria

Immediately following his inauguration, Bush called Obama into the oval office for a private meeting and some words of advice. Bush and Obama shook hands as gentlemen do and then Bush asked if Obama wanted to hear a joke. Obama eagerly said yes, "Good..." Bush said, handing Obama a battered copy of the United States Constitution, "...the joke is in your hands", and with that Bush turned and left.

What's the difference between difference and between? One is different and the other between.

Comment is abusive and has been removed.

What did the mushroom say to the pretty lady? Nothing, because it's a mushroom.

Sarah Palin is President

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? The Holocaust.

Where do farmers retire their used farm equipment? The tree in their backyard.

How many blondes does it take to dye their own hair black and act in an intelligent, sensible manner?

Why are asians so good at maths? Because their culture exercises a hard work ethic in order for many of them to achieve high ranking jobs in order to support their families

What is worse than a paper cut? two paper cuts What is worse than two paper cuts The Holocaust What is worse than The Holocaust Three paper cuts

boy1: whats blue and goes blub blub? boy2:i dont know boy1:a blue blub blub boy1: whats green and goes blub blub? boy2:a green blub blub boy1:no. there is no such thing called a green blub blub

Why can't an elephant smoke cigarettes? They do not posses the fine motor skills.

What's the worst thing a 13 year old could do? Have their Bar Mitzvah in Nazi Germany.

Why wasn't Justin Bieber allowed in the men's bathroom? It was closed for maintenance.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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