When Life gives you lemons... Squeeze the juice right back into Life's eyes!

why cant Joey jump for joy? beacause hes dead

What's up? A direction...

Why can't Billy ride the bicycle? Billy's a fish.

Wanna hear a funny story? Sure. Ok.

Q:When a terrorist attack happened what did the woman with the 1 leg say? A: HOP for your lives!!!!

How do you jump off a bridge? You jump

Q: Why is it sad that nobody was injured in a train crash? A: Because everyone died

Good.

Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: Ronald McDonald was chasing him.

Why did Sally not get her permission slip signed? Because her parents where murdered. Why did Sally not think to ask her grandparents? Because there in jail for killing her parents.

How do you confuse Hellen Keller? Put her in a circular room and tell her to find the corner.

-What's the difference between 100 dead babies and a Ferrari? I don't have a Ferrari in my garage. _________________________________________________________________ -What's the difference between 1,000 dead babies and a Lamborghini? I don't use a pitch fork to move my Lamborghini.

Knock knock. Who's there? Black guy. Due to your skin tone I feel you may cause potential danger to me and my family, so for that reason I will not allow you to enter my home.

How many dead babies can you fit in a bath tub? 17

OBAMA

Roses are red Violets are penis

dfghfgdfhfdhfgdfghdfh

There are two muffins sitting in an oven the first muffin turns to the other and says "Its pretty hot in here." the second muffin jumps back and yells "HOLY SHIT A TALKING MUFFIN!!!"

Knock Knock Who's there? Doctor Doctor who Doctor Octagonapus! BLAAAUUUUGGGHHHH

What's worse than 100 babies tied to a tree. 1 baby tied to 100 trees

You smell bad? Cool.

How do you tell if a politician is lying? You make him take a polygraph test.

what do you call someone that works in a corner shop? Mohamed

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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