What did the dogs say to Michael Vick? Arf Arf Arf, woof woof woof

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An abortionist secretly fancies himself pro life, with reservations. Overwhelmed, and utterly fed up, with the burden of carrying on the family business, he aborts himself. Although he was only 46, his frail mother was nevertheless proud of his decision to succeed where she had failed 46 years ealier.

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Why did the Nazi not help the black man up after he had been badly injured? The Nazi was in a wheelchair.

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Why did tigger look in the toilet? Because he dropped his phone fell in.

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What did the man say to the homeless child. Where's you parents?

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Doctor, doctor! I think I'm a pair of curtains... Well don't worry, you've come to the right place. We'll get you the help you need.

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Who wakes up in the morning feeling like P. Diddy? P. Diddy.

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hey i just meet you and this is crazy but i picked out our wedding cake and named our 4 future children :-)))))))

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What was the biggest party of 2010? The Democrats.

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- Mother, where's my bread? - It's in the living room.

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Whos breath stinks and mas in jail. Bomber Neville

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Two Jews are on their way to the giant oven, one looks back at the other in fear and says, "I think I overcooked the lasagna."

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A moth walks into a podiatrist's office, the podiatrist rubs his eyes and looks again and realizes it was just a man taking off his coat in a grandeur fashion.

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why did the small child drop his icecream? he was hit by a bus

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Why did the Chicken cross the road? Because chickens can move and the road just happened to be in its path.

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Why did the Koala fall out of the tree? It was dead. Why did the second Koala fall out the tree? Hit by the first Koala. Why did the third Koala fall out the tree? Peer pressure

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Why, if you are blending a baby, should you put it in feet first? So you can look in to it's eyes when masturbating.

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Q: Why did the plain crash? A: Because the pilot was a loaf of bread. By: LV

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What's worse than 100 babies tied to a tree. 1 baby tied to 100 trees

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Friends are like trees, they fall down when you hit them multiple times with an axe. N

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Timmy heard that Red Bull gives you wings. He drank one and waited. No wings. He drank another and waited. No wings. Timmy drank 3 cases of Red Bull trying to get wings. Timmy died. The end.

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WILSON!!!!!!!!!

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YOU IS DUM

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Why Can't Asian women drive? a: Cause they are chink assholes who have only peripheral vision

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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