Why do people always walk so slow when your in a rush to get somewhere? They don't it just seems like that

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what happened to the fat lady she went on a diet and is now skinny but she cant resist mcdonalds big macs so she quickly become fat

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How did the dead baby cross the road? stapled to the chickens foot.

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A blonde, a brunette, and a redhead are walking down the street when they find a genie. They run away in fear because finding a genie out of nowhere is kinda freaky.

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What did chuck Norris say to the docter Nothing he never has to go to a hospital

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Tennesse

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cow: MooooooooMoooooooo trafic light: beep beep beep beep beep beep beep beep beep beep beep beep man:AHHHHHHHHHHH GET THIS FAT THING OF, OF ME NOW cow: MOOOOOOO (you shouldnt of said that or i wouldnt of swallowed you) man:TELL MY WIFE I LOVE HER (L.W)

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is mayonnaise an instrument?

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What does an Asian man, Black man, & a Hick all have in common with automatic weapons? The Asian is Vietnamese and fought in the Nam, The Black guy lives in the ghetto and was shot in a drive by, and the hick and his best friend got drunk and shot each other in the foot.

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A plane crashed. The pilot was some sort of food, like a loaf of bread or a salad. Neither of which can fly a plane or do much of anything-- like get a plane to move in the first place, let alone take off.

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3 people walk into a bar. They order the same drinks. Upon receiving these drinks, they all promptly left. This is not a funny joke.

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What do you call a dead black guy? A TERRIBLE CRIME

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Is this a chair?

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why are they called the melbourne storms? Because you turn 360 degrees and walk away

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knock, knock Sho'sthere? Sam who? Sam Butt

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Wanna hear a joke? Women's rights.

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Osama Bin Laden and a monk walk into a bar. Mistaken Identity. It was the Dalai Lama, Osama is dead.

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Jake Bowar

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If I lock you in a room and let a snake in under the door, what do you get? A problem.

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anti jokes are like dogs They both rhyme with Maths

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whats the difference between a jew and a boyscout? A boyscout comes home from camp.

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Knock Knock Come in. Come in who? You're a dumbass.

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A:Will you be my valentine? B:No

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What's worse than finding an apple in your wo- wait, what?!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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