- I did your mom last night! - Thanks, Dad.

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Why was Abraham Lincolin President. He was elected by the people of the united states.

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You're an Irish male that walks into a bar full of Mexicans. Upon entering you are approached by two topless women. ....You realize you have been coming to the same sleazy strip club on the edge of town every night after work for the past few years. After seeing that you have gradually become completely bald and neglect your two children and wife, you recognize your extreme depression. Strippers now see you as a consistent, "paying customer" and you proceed seek psychiatric care, while being prescribed anti-depressants. The Mexicans at the bar are hard working, tax-paying citizens that would like to provide an education for their children.

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Why did the chicken cross the road it was out of its coop

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Sea World Japan.

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what do you call a gay guy in a sleeping bag? a fruit roll-up. GET IT? because gay guys like fruit roll-ups.

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How many light bulbs does it take to screw in a dyslexic child.? DAMN

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock knock. Whos there? NOT SALLY.

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Why should people with Alzheimer's not tell jokes? To get to the other side.

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How do you know a dude is dead? He doesn't breath, he has no color in the face and his heart has stoped.

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What's faster than a black man with a TV? Light.

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Why do showers in Germany have 11 holes? Because a regular human on has 10 fingers.

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Why did Billy want cancer? So he could be like his parents.

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What did the black kid get for Christmas? A Derrick Rose jersey.

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What would Walt Disney be if he were still alive today? Still anti-semetic

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READ IT ALL> whats the difference between a jew and a pizza...the jew is a human with living features and organs that keep his body hydrated while also keeping his blood pumped throughout him, otherwise the pizza is a circular, doe based cake like food topped with a fine layer of cheese and in some cases topped of with other substances such as pineapple or ham :)

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Womens Rights.

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Homework.

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Q: How much wood could a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood? A: None. Woodchucks have herbivorous diet mainly consisting of wild grasses, berries, as well as agricultural crops when they are available.

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why is 5 afraid of 6? it isnt

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sticks and stones may break my bones but hemophilia will make me bleed to death

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Why did the man put his penis in the baby? Because it's warmer than a watermelon.

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Why do they call it a clock radio?... because it's both.

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A priest enters a bar moments after a young teen walks into the same bar. The priest scolds the teen, warning him of the possibility of arrest, alcoholism, and other bad life consquences. The teen apologizes to the bartender, and much later in life, he thanks the priest.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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