What has two wheels, two arms, and a head? A man in a wheelchair. Why was he in a wheelchair? He stepped on a landmine. A man walks, I'm sorry rolled, into a bar.

If you added up all of the grains of sand in all the beaches of the world, how many would there be? Anyone?

Today, we will be identifying power tools. This is not a drill.

why did model 602734 have tests? he didn't

Do you want to hear a joke? Well, I do too.

I cat tried to jump over a fence It was electrified

A gay man walks into a bar has a few drinks then goes home without being recognized as a homosexual.

yo mama is so fat she went to the doctor and the doctor told her she had diabetes

What did Dela Ware? Nothing.

Why did the chicken cross the road? -because chickens have a free ability to walk and this chicken felt the urge to walk across the road. Why not?

If I had a dollar for every funny joke on this site... I would have quite a few dollars. I would't be rich, but I'd have enough money to pay for me and three friends to go see a movie. So I'm talking like $40-$55, give or take. However, do keep in mind that that cost does not include the purchase of any popcorn/food/beverages.

Three kids are standing on a corner. They have red hair, blue hair, and green hair respectively. A man asks the kid with red hair "How did you get your hair red?" The kid replies, "I dyed it." The man then asks the kid with blue hair, "How did you get your hair blue?" The kid replies, "I dyed it." The man finally asks the kid with green hair, "How did you get your hair green?" The kid wipes his hand across his nose, gathering green slime and replies, "I dyed it."

I am not racist, racism is a crime! Crime is for black people.

What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? Nothing...he found it.

How can you confuse a blonde? Give her a calculus worksheet that she hasn't learned how to do.

What do you get when you cross corn with more corn? A devestating force that will make you live on a rowboat and perform demeaning puppet shows you will not Even enyoy!!!!

Why did he walk the dinosaur He took an arrow to the knee so much the DJ didn't was paper-plates.

Roses are Red Violets are Blue you have hemroids

Roses are red Violets are blue Some poems rhyme This one doesn't

what is the difference between oral sex and anal sex? one has to deal with a butt

why was the horse sad his wife had terminal cancer

Three children are celebrating Christmas, Joey got a toy train, Janey got a barbie doll, Know what Jimmy got??? Cancer.

A soccer player, a basketball player, a football player, a hockey player, and a baseball player all walk into a bar at different time periods of the day

Why can't Amy Winehouse drive? She is dead.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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