Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: 9/11

thumb_up thumb_down +15

A guy is taking a pee in the ocean and a fish swims up and drinks the pee. The fish says "thanks for the lemonade."

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Cassie Mills you are gay stop being silly in class you're not funny.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

what do u call a person who reads anti.jokes a hipster

thumb_up thumb_down +15

JESUS SAYS PICTURE HERE ..... Throws a party for 12 people the world still talks about 2012 years latter !

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Whats worse than finding a jew in your bed. Jake skellern

thumb_up thumb_down +13

What happen to the boy who poured water on his head? He got wet.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

A Jew walks into a bar. He sits down for about half an hour, enjoys some drinks and calls a taxi to take him home.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Q: Why didnt the dinosaurs cross the road? A: Because theyre all dead.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it saw an eatable life form.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

How do you make Lady Gaga cry? You set her on fire.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

A jew, a catholic and an atheist are in the desert. They see a dusty lamp. They take it and rub it. Once the lamp is clean, they put it back on the sand and kep walking.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Period Blood

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Don't go to the last anti-joke page, they're all terrible or repeated I hope this isn't one of them

thumb_up thumb_down +11

How do you keep an extraordinary magician from performing his show? Replace his shampoo with battery acid

thumb_up thumb_down +11

If I had a dollar for every funny joke on this site... I would have quite a few dollars. I would't be rich, but I'd have enough money to pay for me and three friends to go see a movie. So I'm talking like $40-$55, give or take. However, do keep in mind that that cost does not include the purchase of any popcorn/food/beverages.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

What is Beethoven's favorite fruit? While Beethoven enjoyed many different varieties of fruit, he found strawberries the most appealing.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Wanna hear a joke about a germ? Sorry I don't want to spread it! -LEts Go Mets!

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Jake Bowar

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Your mother is so fat that when she passes in front of the tv, I lose 3 seasons of the series

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Why did the boy commit suicide? Because he was bullied at school and felt it was the right decision.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Why did Johnny buy the strawberry ice cream? Because when he gets the chocolate he vomits and bleeds out of his asshole.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Q: What is so funny about a dog chasing his tail? A: The dog cannot figue out that it his own tail, and every time he moves so does the tail. Therefore never reaching a satisfying end for the mentaly chalanged mutt.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

There are 4 people in a crashing plane, but there are only 3 parachutes. But, the teenage girl says she is depressed and cannot go on. The older woman breaks down into tears because she is reminded of her rough child hood. The two 21 year old twins start crying, too, because they were corrupted by their alcoholic father who would come home and abuse their family. As they were all crying, the two pilots and the flight attendant took the parachutes and jumped. The older woman realized she went to flight school when she was young so she took control. They were are happy and drank a little bit too much alcohol and got drunk. The pilot also drunk and crashed into a huge skyscraper. This catastrophe was later named 9/11.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops