John Hammond from 'Jurassic Park' looks like KFC's Colonel Sanders. Which is ironic, since chickens are descended from dinosaurs...

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What did the town guard say to the adventurer? "I used to be an adventurer like you, but then I got a full-time job so that I could support my family and spend more time with my children."

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Noobz -wondering why your valid anti-joke is getting voted down? Simply because it's a repeat, someone else has already submitted it. Only the original is valid for positive to votes. The regulars on here willallvote a repeat down immediately. I have 3 accounts set upwith different IP's just to do that. You have been warned. Search first mo fo's

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People with the best sense of humor visit anti-joke.com.

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How do you stop a clown from smiling? Hit him in the face with an axe.

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What call a black man flying a plane? A pilot you racist.

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what do you call a dog with no legs? doesnt matter what you call him, he aint coming!

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¸Knock Knock whos there Penis penis who your family has penis cancer

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What did Dela Ware? Nothing.

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Q:Why did the man rob the bank? A:He needed money.... duhhh -Ryan Vallee

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Whats the worst part about being fat? Your fat.

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A man walks into a bar, his alcoholism is crippling his family.

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Left. That one direction...

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What's worst then the holocaust, titanit and 9-11 4 bee stings.

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What's worse than getting one of your hands cut off? Getting both of your hands cut off.

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George Bush does not care about black people.

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What did the homeless man get for Christmas? Nothing, he's Jewish.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I wish you were here, To get to the other side!

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Why did he walk the dinosaur He took an arrow to the knee so much the DJ didn't was paper-plates.

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whats the difference between a battery and a charger

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why did the cookie go to the docter he felt crumpie

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If I had a dollar for every funny joke on this site... I would have quite a few dollars. I would't be rich, but I'd have enough money to pay for me and three friends to go see a movie. So I'm talking like $40-$55, give or take. However, do keep in mind that that cost does not include the purchase of any popcorn/food/beverages.

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How many dead babies can fit in a bathtub. Twelve. A previous joke said seventeen, that person had their facts wrong. I know from experience

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Three children are celebrating Christmas, Joey got a toy train, Janey got a barbie doll, Know what Jimmy got??? Cancer.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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