How to confuse a blonde. Buy 14 monkeys dye them purple and orange and hide them in her wardrobe

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Who's gay and has buttsex? Dan.

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What is the difference between Santa, and a Jew? Santa goes DOWN the chimney

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What did the deaf guy say to the other deaf guy? What?

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HARRY EFFING STYLES

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Hitler: I said PASS THE JUICE! not GAS THE JEWS!

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Yo mama is so fat that: it is ruining her self esteem and she worries about her health.

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A teacher notices one of her students clutching a cat. She asks him why. The boy, tearfully, explains that he heard his father tell his mother that he was going to eat her pussy when the kids left for school. The teacher laughs and, the class being 10-11 years old thereby at an age approaching biological curiosity, decides to mix this in with a sex education video she was planning on showing them a few weeks later. She then phones the boy's parents who come to collect the cat while reassuring the boy that it is in no danger. The cat was popular with the boy's classmates and they would often go to visit him as a result. Many years later, just after the boy started attending university, the cat was put to sleep at the age of 13 due to liver cancer. The boy placed a Facebook post in honour of his feline friend, which was spotted by a former classmate of his in a routine search who happened to be attending the same university. They ended up reacquainting and beginning a sexual relationship, which was how the boy lost his virginity and eventually blossomed into a 37-year marriage resulting in three children.

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Did you hear that joke about Helen Keller? Neither did she.

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Q:why do bananas where sunscreen? A:beacause they peel!!haha

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Why couldn't Larry walk his dog? Larry doesn't have a dog.

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Why didn't the blonde get into college? She was killed in a car accident.

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What did the scientist say to the postman? So your a postman?

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Knock Knock Come in, the door's open.

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What do you call a fat ethiopian. Impossible

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There is this dylectic who can't spell.

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Whats red and smells like blue paint? Red paint.

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John:Why couldn't the T-Rex clay his hands? Billy:Because his arms are too small! John:no he's extinct dumbass

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Why was the pencil case unzipped? Because it wasn't zipped up.

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There's no "i" in tim.

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What do you call a bird on the beach? A seagull.

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Why the girl fell from the swing? cause she had no arms

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why was 6 afraid of 7? because 7 8 9

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Why did the chicken cross the road? There was a wild dog on the other side, so he crossed the road to avoid potential danger.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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