Do you know the Muffin Man? Of course you don't, faggot.

thumb_up thumb_down +53

penis hehehehe

thumb_up thumb_down +51

What did Jeff say to the guy who stole his car? Can I have my car back.

thumb_up thumb_down +51

what's worse than a hole in your sock? Getting raped!

thumb_up thumb_down +49

Women's rights.

thumb_up thumb_down +43

Whats red and smells like blue paint? Red paint.

thumb_up thumb_down +41

Knock knock. Who's there? Becca. I just found out i have aids, so you should probably get yourself checked out.

thumb_up thumb_down +41

Why can't Stevie Wonder drive? There is no steering wheel at the back of the bus.

thumb_up thumb_down +41

Why did Sally fall off the swing? She has no arms or legs. Knock knock Who's there? Not Sally

thumb_up thumb_down +41

whats black and yellow and makes you smile? a bus full of black people going off a cliff. do you shame is? there was three empty seats.

thumb_up thumb_down +39

a redheaded man walks into a bar. he is wanted for raping and murdering 13 children

thumb_up thumb_down +37

Why did the bird fall out of the tree? Because it was dead. Why did the squirrel fall out of the tree? Because he was stapled to the bird

thumb_up thumb_down +37

Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she's a woman.

thumb_up thumb_down +37

What do you call a one eyed hippo? A do-you-think-he-potamus

thumb_up thumb_down +35

How do you kill a dinosaur? You don't. It's already dead.

thumb_up thumb_down +35

What did Sarah Palin say to her daughter on Christmas? Merry Christmas

thumb_up thumb_down +35

A student goes up to the teacher because he has to go to the washroom. The teacher tells him that he has to sing the ABC's before he can go. So the boy sings, "ABCDEFGHIJKLMNOPQRSTUVWXYZ." The teacher said he did a perfect job and could go to the washroom. The boy went on to become a billionaire. Congrats!

thumb_up thumb_down +35

How many Republicans does it take to screw in a lightbulb? I would think one would be sufficient, though political affiliation shouldn't have anything to do with the situation. Unless the lightbulb was residing in a specified meeting place for members of the Republican party. Also, if the building was a more public institution for gatherings, which could imply larger ceilings, then two might be needed, just for safety precautions.

thumb_up thumb_down +33

I always tell people " I have the heart of a child! " Then I continue "It's in a jar on my desk"

thumb_up thumb_down +33

What's red and bad for your teeth? A brick

thumb_up thumb_down +33

That didn't hurt.

thumb_up thumb_down +33

What do you get when you cross an elephant and a rhino? Photoshop

thumb_up thumb_down +31

If a tree falls in the woods, and no one is around to hear it - Is there still a woman in the kitchen?

thumb_up thumb_down +31

Why do they call it a clock radio?... because it's both.

thumb_up thumb_down +31

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops