Yo mama so fat, she most likely wont live to 40

Its april fools day and a women is in labour and has to rush to the hospital. Her husband couldn't make it so it is just the doctor and her in the delivery room. 4 hours of labour go by and complications arise. 12 hours later she gives birth toa beautiful baby boy. The doctor wipes the baby off and goes to hand it to her but then suddenly pulls it back and kicks it a cross the room. The mother screamed "my baby boy!" and the doctor smiles and says "April fools! It was already dead!"

Why did the boy fall of the swing? Because he had no arms

What is worse than 50 dead babies stapled to trees? One baby stapled to 50 trees. What is worse than one baby stapled to 50 trees? One tree stapled to 50 babies.

Two black guys walk into a bar and arrest the under age drinkers

What do you call a person on a swing? F u c k N i g g e r s

What did the lady say to her child? Nothing sadly the baby was taken to Timbuktu by the father. Ps: it's a real place look it up

What is this a book??!!! What am I supposed to do...... READ IT?????!!!!!!!!!

Why did the bunny eat his food

Life is like a box of chocolates. You eat them. get fat. Die.

Why did the monkey fall off his tricycle? He got hit by a fridge.

Ken: Your dog is sick, he needs to see a vet. Megan: Omg, what is it? Ken: It's a medical person who treats animals.

Agricultural production fell significantly.

Why couldn't the boy play catch with his dad? His Dad is dead.

Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she's a woman.

Yourrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr soo uglyyyyyy

What is so sad about 5 black people going over a cliff in a Cadaliac? That was my Cadaliac

How do Ethiopians celebrate Christmas? They don't there to worried about dying from Aids and starvation

How do you make a baby cry? You throw a brick at it's face.

I always tell people " I have the heart of a child! " Then I continue "It's in a jar on my desk"

Tommy has no arms and legs. What did he get for Christmas? Cancer

Why can't dinosaurs talk? Because they're dead.

How do you find the population of Mexico? You take a census count by mail and/or a door to door questionnaire.

Roses are red, violets are blue. I have a gun, get in the van!

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...