Who taught Chuck Norris? -Chuck Norris

Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't.

Du bist mein Kampf

What is the answer to the universe? I would tell you but you would get board.

How did the dead baby cross the road? stapled to the chickens foot.

So a disabled man walks into a bar...

How do you confuse a blond? Ask her to solve ( [3x - 3x^2 +1]^744 ) x ( [- 3x + 3x^2 +1]^745 )

Why did the man have no head? He did it was under his shirt

Why did the man have a bad day? Well first of all, his wife left him, then his two kids both committed suicide, then a large falcon pecked at him genital area. After that he proceeded to be hit by a car, and soon after he was hit by a bus. Following this, his corpse was raped by a transvestite pig, and then finally his spirit got hit by a plane on its way up to heaven, knocking it to Hell.

What do you get when Chuck Norris meets Chuck Norris? A bad joke.

Her lips aren't proportionally fit to her face

cow: MooooooooMoooooooo trafic light: beep beep beep beep beep beep beep beep beep beep beep beep man:AHHHHHHHHHHH GET THIS FAT THING OF, OF ME NOW cow: MOOOOOOO (you shouldnt of said that or i wouldnt of swallowed you) man:TELL MY WIFE I LOVE HER (L.W)

what happened after 9/11?? 9/12.

what do you call a dog with no legs? doesnt matter what you call him, he aint coming!

Want to hear a joke about my penis? Nevermind it's too long.

So a woman is in the kitchen. And she makes the most delicious turkey salad for her 4 hungry children and her husband. They love Jesus

What do you call bad anti-jokes? Suckish comedy What do you call suckish comedy? Bad anti-jokes

What do you call a man who has no heart? Dead

Your mom is so fat because she ate her emotions when your dad walked out, not to mention her history of bulimia as a teenager.

People tell me im insane. Its all a conspiracy.

How do you make a fat kid cry? You hold an onion up to their face.

Why did the girl fall off the swing? Someone threw a fridge at her...

Grandma got ran over by a reindeer. She died.

Why couldn't Helen Keller drive? Because she was a woman...

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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