what is the difference between a Jew and a pizza? -one is the chosen people of Isreal and one is a food that was founded in Italy

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Me: Hello. You: Oh, hi. Me: How are you today? You: I'm fat.

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Is this a chair?

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A man walked into a bar and it hurt.

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anti jokes are like dogs They both rhyme with Maths

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Why is Alex Mann Fat? Because he doesnt eat healthy food.

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How many atheists does it take to change a lightbulb? One.

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Why don't women need watches? Because they have clocks on their cell phones because they have jobs outside of the house and are INDEPENDENT WOMEN! MEN DO NOT DEFINE THEM!

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When life gives you lemons you get sugar and water and make some good lemonaide.

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What's the sound of victory? The sound of a knife cutting into a baby.

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-Knock knock -Go away -*Breaks door and shoots*

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why did the mexican cross the road? To get into America. Why did the chicken cross the road? It was on its way to warn everyone that the sky was falling Why did the horse go to the other side of the field? He liked green grass. Why did Chuck Norris cross the road? cause he's Chuck Norris. What do you call a man who gets a check in the mail every month for nothing? black

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why did the chicken cross the road? to give a doctor the cure for cancer but some ass hole ran him over

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-When is a door not a door? -Never

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Jake Bowar

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Robocop and T-800 where fighting, first the T-800 manages to injure Robocop critically, but Robocop manages to repair himself and break T-800`s legs off, which T-800 suddenly regrows due to an unexpected upgrade. After several hours of combat, where civilians are injured and half the town is destroyed they where both worn out, but ready for one last struggle... ...Eventually there was a great celebration for whoever won.

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What's the difference between Michael Jackson and Michael Jordan? Their last names.

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Why do people play video games? Because audio games are not as fun.

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Knock Knock Come in. Come in who? You're a dumbass.

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What do call someone who kills their own children? Casey Anthony

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Why did the 15 year old girl not enjoy her taco? Because the man making her taco was kid napped and replaced with a female that forgot to put cheese on it.

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What do you call a watermelon in Africa? A watermelon.

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Why did the plane crash? Cause the pilot was a loaf of bread

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What's the best thing about having sex with twenty eight year olds? There's twenty of them.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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