Knock Knock.... Knock Knock.... Knock Knock.... I guess no ones home.

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How is a white orphan like a black baby? Neither are sure who their parents are :(

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How many Jews can you fit in a car? It really depends on the make and model of the car, as well as the relative size and weight of the people in question, but legally you can only have as many people in the car as there are seatbelts available for them.

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Why cant Michael Jackson take flying lessons? Because he overdosed on pain killers, and is now dead.

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What did the lady say to her child? Nothing sadly the baby was taken to Timbuktu by the father. Ps: it's a real place look it up

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Roses are red. Violets are blue. Onions stink. And so do you.

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A guy walks into a restaurant and sits down only to realize he is not wearing any pants. Immediately the police are called and arrest the man for indecent exposure. Given there were children in the restaurant at the time, the man is also charged as level 3 sex offender and is held on $100,000 bail. His wife commits suicide from embarrassment, leaving her 10 year old son up for adoption who later gets involved with drugs due to his rough childhood.

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Sometimes people get confused when sentences don't end the way they elephant.

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How does a blind bit of difference differ from one that can see?

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Knock Knock Who's There? No One You're Crazy

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Roses are Red Violets are Blue I have five fingers and one of then is poking at you

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Knock knock (No one is home)

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Goats are like mushrooms. If you shoot a duck, I'm scared of toasters

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How do you know a man is Jewish? Because he told you or you met him in a synagogue.

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Canada

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knock knock whos there? how should I know?

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What did the cat say to the dog? "Meow."

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Why din't the boy get a Christmas present? Because his dad go hit by a bus.

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Why couldn't the boy play catch with his dad? His Dad is dead.

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Wanna hear something half funny 34.5

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What's green and has wheels? Grass. I lied about the wheels

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why did the chicken cross the road?? to go shopping for some aspirin because one of his children recently developed a raging headache and it was only logical for him to go to the pharmacy that was conveniantly placed across the road.

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This is'nt a joke but like if it pisses you off when people comment on there own joke pretending to be someone else.

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What do you get when you cross a dog and a cat? A hybrid animal that can never exist to do each species own genetic make-up which would subsequently reject the other's. I.E. The cat would reject the dog sperm from ever fertilizing and the dog would reject cat sperm.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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