What did the Catholic Priest do to the 9-year-old boy? He ate him. The priest was actually Jeffery Dahmer.

Jake Bowar

What is Beethoven's favorite fruit? While Beethoven enjoyed many different varieties of fruit, he found strawberries the most appealing.

Wanna hear a joke about a germ? Sorry I don't want to spread it! -LEts Go Mets!

If I had a dollar for every funny joke on this site... I would have quite a few dollars. I would't be rich, but I'd have enough money to pay for me and three friends to go see a movie. So I'm talking like $40-$55, give or take. However, do keep in mind that that cost does not include the purchase of any popcorn/food/beverages.

Why did Johnny buy the strawberry ice cream? Because when he gets the chocolate he vomits and bleeds out of his asshole.

Your mother is so fat that when she passes in front of the tv, I lose 3 seasons of the series

What did the black man say to the jewish man? Hello.

There are 4 people in a crashing plane, but there are only 3 parachutes. But, the teenage girl says she is depressed and cannot go on. The older woman breaks down into tears because she is reminded of her rough child hood. The two 21 year old twins start crying, too, because they were corrupted by their alcoholic father who would come home and abuse their family. As they were all crying, the two pilots and the flight attendant took the parachutes and jumped. The older woman realized she went to flight school when she was young so she took control. They were are happy and drank a little bit too much alcohol and got drunk. The pilot also drunk and crashed into a huge skyscraper. This catastrophe was later named 9/11.

Q: What is so funny about a dog chasing his tail? A: The dog cannot figue out that it his own tail, and every time he moves so does the tail. Therefore never reaching a satisfying end for the mentaly chalanged mutt.

what did the ugly girl get on valentines? A paper bag

How do you get a clown off a swing? Hit it in the face with an axe

How did Ronald McDonald die? He was hit by a big mac

solve y = [1 arctan (x)] / [2-3 arctan (x)]

1. 2. 3. 4. 5.

The 19th Amendment

Why did the dad buy his son some ice cream? He didnt, his dad is dead

YOLO

How does a plumber cross the street? Using his legs

your mom is so black that it can be assumed she is of african descent

How do you starve a black family? Hide there government assistance card under their work boots!

What do you call a black man flying a plane. A pilot.

The World Record For Longest Game of Hide and Seek goes to... Binladin

Why don't Polish women use vibrators? They are extremely conservative Catholics.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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