Whats black and has wheels a black man i lied about the wheels

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A horse walks into a bar and then out of the bar

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A Muslim get's on a plain. He is heading to Spain, and has a lovely time.

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What did the homosexual say to the purse walking down the street? - I'm a homosexual.

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A man walks into a psychiatrists office with a banana in his ear, The psychiatrist says, why do you have that banana in your ear. The man says, "What?" The psychiatrist says, "I said, 'Why do you have that banana in your ear?" The man says, "What?" The psychiatrist shouts, "I SAID, WHY DO YOU HAVE THAT BANANA IN YOUR EAR?" The man says, "Sorry, I can't hear you, I'm deaf." (props- Marty Smith)

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Is this a chair?

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An elephant and a rabbit sit on the forest floor and poop. The elephant asks the rabbit " doesn't it annoy you when the poop sticks to your fur?" "no" replies the rabbit. So the elephant picks up the rabbit and wipes his but with him.

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What is funnier than 9 black fellas dead in a trashbin? 1 black fella dead in 9 trashbins.

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How do you spell Madeleine Mccann? I A N

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How do you keep an extraordinary magician from performing his show? Replace his shampoo with battery acid

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Don't go to the last anti-joke page, they're all terrible or repeated I hope this isn't one of them

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Why did Johnny buy the strawberry ice cream? Because when he gets the chocolate he vomits and bleeds out of his asshole.

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What's the sound of victory? The sound of a knife cutting into a baby.

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In the beginning God created the heavens and the Earth. He then created the water, the sky, land, sea creatures, land creatures and humans. He rested.

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What did the cannibal eat for Christmas. Your Mom!

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Did you know Helen Keller had a swingset in her backyard Neither did she.

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Teacher- "Sally Sue, a sentence that starts with I, please."\ Sally Sue- "I is..." Teacher- "no, no, Sally Sue, when you start with I, you must follow it with am." Sally Sue- "I am the 9th letter of the alphebet."

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Knock Knock Who's there? Nobody, you got ding-dong-ditched

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A Priest, a Rabbi, and a Methodist minister were playing golf. The Priest won by one stroke.

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Q: What is the difference between a black man and a Park bench? A: A park bench is an inanimate object.

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What starts with a 'D' and ends with 'ick' Daniel and Jimmy are walking in the park when suddenly they get hit by a stick because a mysterious person threw the stick.

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Why did the cancerous elephant cross the road?

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What happened when the roof fell on a young boy? Nothing. He was an orphan.

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My Japanese girlfriend left me the other day... I am now depressed and have resorted to comfort eating.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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