Whats Green and has wheels? Grass, I was kidding about the wheels.

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monkey sponge

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Why does the Anti-Joke site suck? Because it's not funny.

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-What's the difference between 100 dead babies and a Ferrari? I don't have a Ferrari in my garage. _________________________________________________________________ -What's the difference between 1,000 dead babies and a Lamborghini? I don't use a pitch fork to move my Lamborghini.

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Why didn't the skeleton go to the ball? Because skeletons are no longer sentient beings and cannot move.

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Why did the chick cross the road? He didn't. He was attending his father's funeral, who had been killed earlier that week by an oncoming car as he was crossing the road.

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What is worse than finding a worm in your apple? Me.

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Your mom

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why did the man fall over he was a loaf of bread

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What noise does a dead dog make ? Nothing its dead

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Knock Knock.... Knock Knock.... Knock Knock.... I guess no ones home.

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What did the elephant say to the goldfish? Nothing. Animals are unable to speak and fish aren't able to live on land

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Why did the pig fly cuz his wife is a bitch

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A day without sunshine is like night.

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Why are asians so good at maths? Because their culture exercises a hard work ethic in order for many of them to achieve high ranking jobs in order to support their families

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Why did the car suddenly stop? It was at a redlight.

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Roses are red. Violets are blue. Onions stink. And so do you.

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A guy walks into a restaurant and sits down only to realize he is not wearing any pants. Immediately the police are called and arrest the man for indecent exposure. Given there were children in the restaurant at the time, the man is also charged as level 3 sex offender and is held on $100,000 bail. His wife commits suicide from embarrassment, leaving her 10 year old son up for adoption who later gets involved with drugs due to his rough childhood.

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penis hehehehe

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What did the black man, chinese man, and mexican man all have in common? They all happened to enjoy cantaloupe.

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Knock knock Whose there? you you who you know who you are

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What is worse than a Catholic priest being caught red handed raping 7 kids? 1. Thou shall not steal. 2. Thou shall be kindeth to thy neigbour... 3. Not attending to church is a sin... Moral: Catholic priests need to get their priorities straight... or gay, just not pedo!

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Roses are red, violets are red, daffodils are yellow, and pansies are pink.

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A penguin was waddling along one day and saw a seal.. The seal stood up and procceded to talk and jump and even twirled around... The penguin realized this was impossible for a seal to be doing this so he hopped on his unicycle and just rode home because he was going to be late for his piano recital

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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