Why did the man have a bad day? Well first of all, his wife left him, then his two kids both committed suicide, then a large falcon pecked at him genital area. After that he proceeded to be hit by a car, and soon after he was hit by a bus. Following this, his corpse was raped by a transvestite pig, and then finally his spirit got hit by a plane on its way up to heaven, knocking it to Hell.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

Why did the chicken cross the road? KFC was closed.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

what do you call a dog with no legs? doesnt matter what you call him, he aint coming!

thumb_up thumb_down +17

ABCDEFGHIJKLMNOPQRSUCKMYDICK

thumb_up thumb_down +17

A blind man accidentally walks into another man whilst walking along a sidewalk. The man yells at the blind man, "Watch where you're going!" He then apologizes for his rude behaviour, not noticing right away he was in fact, blind. To show how truthfully sorry he was he took him out for beers the following evening. Soon after they became close friends and now share an apartment in Denver, Colorado.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

How did the dead baby cross the road? stapled to the chickens foot.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

Why did the boy fall off his bike? Because he fell off his bike.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

How do you make a Mexican parade? Contact members of the Latin community and inform them of your wish to organize a parade celebrating their heritage.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

A Banana wrote this...

thumb_up thumb_down +13

So this guy drunk guy pokes this girl. 4 months later the girl has a misscarrage.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

What do you call a dead black guy? A TERRIBLE CRIME

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Why couldn't Helen Keller drive? Because she was a woman...

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Yo mama is so fat, she had to get liposuction.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Robocop and T-800 where fighting, first the T-800 manages to injure Robocop critically, but Robocop manages to repair himself and break T-800`s legs off, which T-800 suddenly regrows due to an unexpected upgrade. After several hours of combat, where civilians are injured and half the town is destroyed they where both worn out, but ready for one last struggle... ...Eventually there was a great celebration for whoever won.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

What happen to the boy who poured water on his head? He got wet.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

If I lock you in a room and let a snake in under the door, what do you get? A problem.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Hey, name is Anita, I am Nero`s nurse, he told me to say that if you wish to speak any further, you are going to have to call him and prove you are not some guy. Say Tifa, do you ever play videogames?

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Chayton

thumb_up thumb_down +9

I scream! You scream! - You've Just Been Rapped

thumb_up thumb_down +9

This is probably how President Obama proposed to his wife. "I don't wanna be Obama self"

thumb_up thumb_down +9

What happened when a terrorist puts a bomb in a hospital? Everyone dies cause it was a hospital for crippled people

thumb_up thumb_down +9

the website says jokes, yet these are all facts.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

What iz stupid? Hibiyav

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Two Penn State administrators walk into a butt.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops