What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? Nothing...he found it.

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How do you make Lady Gaga cry? You set her on fire.

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Jake Bowar

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Is this a chair?

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Martin Luther King Jr. had a dream..... But Leonardo DiCaprio had a dream within a dream within a dream within a dream.

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is mayonnaise an instrument?

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In the beginning God created the heavens and the Earth. He then created the water, the sky, land, sea creatures, land creatures and humans. He rested.

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Q: What do starving children in Africa eat? A: Nothing

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Why did the boy commit suicide? Because he was bullied at school and felt it was the right decision.

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Your mother is so fat that when she passes in front of the tv, I lose 3 seasons of the series

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Q: Who won the fight of two black guys and a white guy? A: The black and white guy because two is better than one.

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Whats worse than the holocaust??having a downstndrome for a child

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What do you call a watermelon in Africa? A watermelon.

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Whats the differance between a preist and acne? Acne dosent cum on your face untill your 12

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If I lock you in a room and let a snake in under the door, what do you get? A problem.

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Where does Frosty the Snowman keep his money? He doesn't keep it. His lifespan is too short to make significant compound intrest.

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Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she's dead-

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whats the difference between a jew and a boyscout? A boyscout comes home from camp.

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-Knock knock -Go away -*Breaks door and shoots*

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If I had a dollar for every funny joke on this site... I would have quite a few dollars. I would't be rich, but I'd have enough money to pay for me and three friends to go see a movie. So I'm talking like $40-$55, give or take. However, do keep in mind that that cost does not include the purchase of any popcorn/food/beverages.

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There are 4 people in a crashing plane, but there are only 3 parachutes. But, the teenage girl says she is depressed and cannot go on. The older woman breaks down into tears because she is reminded of her rough child hood. The two 21 year old twins start crying, too, because they were corrupted by their alcoholic father who would come home and abuse their family. As they were all crying, the two pilots and the flight attendant took the parachutes and jumped. The older woman realized she went to flight school when she was young so she took control. They were are happy and drank a little bit too much alcohol and got drunk. The pilot also drunk and crashed into a huge skyscraper. This catastrophe was later named 9/11.

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Why did the cancerous elephant cross the road?

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I have alzheimers but atleast I don't have alzheimers

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What did the black man say to the jewish man? Hello.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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