What's the best thing to say to a deaf person? Nothing. They are hearing impaired and won't hear you.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

Gestapo.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

roses are red, violets are blue, i have a gun, shut the **** up.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

Me: "Dad! Can you make me a sandwich?" Dad: "Poof! You are now a sandwich."

thumb_up thumb_down +18

Why did the man have a bad day? Well first of all, his wife left him, then his two kids both committed suicide, then a large falcon pecked at him genital area. After that he proceeded to be hit by a car, and soon after he was hit by a bus. Following this, his corpse was raped by a transvestite pig, and then finally his spirit got hit by a plane on its way up to heaven, knocking it to Hell.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

what do you call a dog with no legs? doesnt matter what you call him, he aint coming!

thumb_up thumb_down +18

timmy: a duck walks up to a lemon stand and says to the man running the stand hey... Paul: what r u talking about its duck it can't talk

thumb_up thumb_down +18

Why do black men run faster then white men? Because they practice more and some simply want to improve themselves in the sport more then other men. Of course, some white men are faster then some black men, so the whole question in general is not true. You should not believe everything you read on here.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

A terrorist walks into a bar and shoots the bartender.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

How did the dead baby cross the road? stapled to the chickens foot.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

What is white on the top and black on the bottom? Society

thumb_up thumb_down +16

A blonde, a brunette, and a redhead are walking down the street when they find a genie. They run away in fear because finding a genie out of nowhere is kinda freaky.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

whats better than 24................. 25

thumb_up thumb_down +16

Roses Are Blue Violets Are Purple Black is Purple Im colorblind

thumb_up thumb_down +16

How are cherries and kittens different? They're both fun to cut up.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it lacks the cognitive reasoning ability necessary to determine that walking into oncoming traffic will surely result in death

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it saw an eatable life form.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Don't think of granny porn

thumb_up thumb_down +14

is mayonnaise an instrument?

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Whats worse than scraping your elbow and knee? Beheading and disembowlment.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Is this a chair?

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Q: Who won the fight of two black guys and a white guy? A: The black and white guy because two is better than one.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

How do you spell Madeleine Mccann? I A N

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Why did Chuck Norris cross the road? Cause he's Chuck Norris

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops