A man was building a new kitchen for his wife. Just as he was installing the sink, his wife comes running into the kitchen and starts cursing. "What's the matter?" he asks. "Don't you like the new sink?" His wife replies, "I love it. But come quick, there's a spider in the living room!" The man walks over with a paper towel, grabs the spider, and throws it into the garbage. The wife looks at the husband, smiling, and says, "Thanks."

Japan called... They need help.

How did the chicken cross the road? By foot.

Roses are red Violtes are Blue Sugar is Sweet and salt is salty

Why did the girl fall off the swing? Because she had no arms.

What's yellow and can't Swim? A bulldozer

What's funnier than a bus full of burning babies? Nothing.

who can jump higher than mount everest? anyone. mount everest cant jump

What's red and bad for your teeth? A brick

Friend: I said pass the juice, not gas the jews! Hitler: Oh.

Roses are red Violets are blue I am a cactus and you are a Jew EJ

¸Knock Knock whos there Penis penis who your family has penis cancer

How u know when ur sister have periods... Fathers dig taste like blood

Have you ever met a black man who wasn't good at basketball? I have, quite regularly.

How do you starve a black person? Hide his food stamps in his work boots

Why do Jews make sure their cars can stop on a dime? So if something happens unexpectedly when they are driving they have a better chance of avoiding a dangerous collision.

Why cant Jesus play rugby? Cause he's nailed to a cross

Why did Sara fall off the swings? She had no arms. Knock Knock. Who's there? Not Sara.

What call a duck with no wings? A deformity.

-What do you call a pyromaniac on a golf course? *** I backed over your cat. -A FIREHAZ- wait what?

Knock knock. Who's there? Interrupting doctor. Interrupting doct- You have cancer.

Unflushed Shit...

I went to the zoo yesterday. There was only one dog, it was a shitzu

What do you call a dead blonde in a closet? A rape victim.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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