How do you stop your baby from crawling into your room? Shove a spear through its head.

What do you sit on, sleep on and brush your teeth with? A chair, a bed, and a toothbrush

Why did tigger look in the toilet? Because he dropped his phone fell in.

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was dead. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was tied to the first monkey.

hey i just meet you and this is crazy but i picked out our wedding cake and named our 4 future children :-)))))))

Whats worse than a bee sting? - Two bee stings Whats worse than two bee stings? -The Holocaust Whats worse than the Holocaust? -Three bee stings

Why did the tree fall down? Because no one caught it.

How old is the old man? Probably how old he is

A man orders 3,687 bricks. He gets 3,688 bricks delivered to him. He throws the extra brick in the air. Ok, so a man is smoking a cigar by a woman with a small poodle. They are both in a plane. The woman asks the man if he could get rid of the cigar because the smoke is making her dog turn green. The man refuses. In anger, she throws the cigar out of the window. The man gets angry and throws the poodle out the window. What lands in the poodles mouth when it's falling? The brick.

Bob: What's gucci bro Tim: Is that a company?

What's up? A direction...

Whats big, ugly, and sucks? Death.

What's worse than dropping your icecream? Slavery

Q: Why is it sad that nobody was injured in a train crash? A: Because everyone died

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Why did Sally not get her permission slip signed? Because her parents where murdered. Why did Sally not think to ask her grandparents? Because there in jail for killing her parents.

did you know the leading cause of funerals is death?

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Why did the little boy fall down? Because he was shot.

Why did the little boy cross the road? He didnt. He actually got halfway across the road and was struck by a fast moving car. There is now a memorial on the side of the road mourning his death...

Why is 6 afraid of 7? Because 7, 1, 2 in mod7.

Why do Kenyans run so much? Because they like it.

What do you call an angry black man? Angry.

What's the difference between a black man and a bunk bed? A bunk bed is stable and can support two children.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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