roses are red, violets are blue, hey reed and steven, we should hang out

A girl asks a guy "How come you don't take me dancing anymore?" The guy said "Because we were both killed in a car accident."

Can Helen Keller keep a secret? No, she didn't hear it in the first place

What do you call a Mexican named Chicee? Chicee

On the first day of Christmas, my true love gave to me... Nothing, because I'm single.

why didnt you take a shower? because my house burnt down

What do you get when Chuck Norris meets Chuck Norris? A bad joke.

What is the difference between a hore and a wife? The hore serves you...

How did the dead baby cross the road? stapled to the chickens foot.

Gestapo.

ABCDEFGHIJKLMNOPQRSUCKMYDICK

what do you call a dog with no legs? doesnt matter what you call him, he aint coming!

Why do white people wear black shirts? Why do black people wear white shirts?

How do you get a guitar player to play softer? Ask them politely to turn down their volume.

A police man, doctor and stage actor walk into a bar. They're identifying the corpse of the stage actor's brother.

You know whats funnier than 24? What? 25.

Bert: Hey, what you got there? Sal: Nothing.

D is for diabetes, Cookie Monster, if you keep this up.

Whats worse than scraping your elbow and knee? Beheading and disembowlment.

Whats the differance between a preist and acne? Acne dosent cum on your face untill your 12

Q; Why was the man loosing his hair? A; Because since he was at an older age, he was going bald.

What is the difference between a grape and an elephant? They are both grapes, except for the elephant.

Will my son live, doctor? No because you don't have a son and I am not a doctor

Two black guys jump off of a building; who falls first? The one that jumped first

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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