There is a secret society known as Grandma Elbow. What happened to the boy who tried to leave it? All of his limbs were ripped off and fed to a man eating shark by the name of Nigel Tommy Baker. It didn't hurt that much because the boy was forced into eating the waste products of a donkey before this happened. NEVER LEAVE GRANDMA ELBOw!

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Knock Knock. Whos there? Death

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What do you call 4 black people at a kfc? A family sitting down for there evening meal

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What is the best time to go to the dentist? During office hours 2 or 3 times a year to ensure optimal dental health and hygiene .

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Jacob Black and Edward Cullen show up at your house. You tell your best girl friend and she has you admitted to a psych ward because everyone knows they are fictional characters!

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Where did Sally go after the explosion? Everywhere.

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Two scientists walk into a bar. The first scientist says, "I'll have some H2O." The second scientist says, "I'll have H2O too." The bartender gives them both water, realizing that H2O2 is poisonous and that the second scientist must have simple worded his request poorly.

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Why did a lady get in a car crash? Because woman don't drive, they stay in the kitchen!

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Q: What is worse than bitting in to an apple and finding a worm? A: Bitting in to a worm and finding an apple.

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Why are we on a roof? Becuse some idiot gave us all roofies.

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what did the frog say to the princess? nothing because frogs do not possess sufficient linguistic skills to communicate with humans

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What do you call two Mexicans playing basketball? A game of one-on-one basketball in a common physical education class in present day mexico city.

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Whats long and hard on a black man..... 2nd grade

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Hey, I just met you, and this is crazy but get in the van

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What's the difference between a jew and a boyscout? A boyscout comes back from camp.

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Q. What did the priest and the atler boy do in the back room of the church? A. Disscussed their feelings about the different meanings that could be derived from the daily scripture reading.

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Why did Doris want to father children? Because she wanted to have a fry-up with the leftover baby oil

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What's the same between a plane a bird and a piece of celery? They all fly except the celery

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How many blonds does it take to kidnap a child? One.

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That guy is so lame, he needs a wheelchair to go places.

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Why is the horse gay. He rapes 3 children

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What do you call a muslim? A terrorist

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A gay man walks into a bar has a few drinks then goes home without being recognized as a homosexual.

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How do you stop a skunk from smelling? Block its nose.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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