Anti jokes.

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q: Why does my grandpa climbs a phone pole with a bag of bananas? a: He likes to climb and he might get hungry.

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why was the black man in jail? He stole food from a store due to the fact that his family was very poor and could not afford to fend for themselves.

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If pinocchio said "my nose is going to grow", what would happen?

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Roses are red Violets are blue I can't rhyme coffee table.

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What does a Jew do when he sees a masked man at his door? He grabs a phone to alert the police and hides in his bedroom.

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Knock Knock Knock Knock Knock Knock WHAT THE F*** DO YOU WANT?!?!?!?! Oh, well then nevermind

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

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Yo momma is so fat that you should really take her to the hospital, i've become very concerned for her.

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What is brown and sticky? The substance used to line your stomach when getting your stomach pumped.

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The fitting room is a lie. Nothing fit me at all.

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maddie latino

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Mommy, where do babies come from? In biology, sex is a process of combining and mixing genetic traits, often resulting in the specialization of organisms into a male or female variety (each known as a sex). Sexual reproduction involves combining specialized cells (gametes) to form offspring that inherit traits from both parents. Gametes can be identical in form and function (known as isogametes), but in many cases an asymmetry has evolved such that two sex-specific types of gametes (heterogametes) exist: male gametes are small, motile, and optimized to transport their genetic information over a distance, while female gametes are large, non-motile and contain the nutrients necessary for the early development of the young organism. An organism's sex is defined by the gametes it produces: males produce male gametes (spermatozoa, or sperm) while females produce female gametes (ova, or egg cells); individual organisms which produce both male and female gametes are termed hermaphroditic. Frequently, physical differences are associated with the different sexes of an organism; these sexual dimorphisms can reflect the different reproductive pressures the sexes experience. Thanks mommy

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what did the girl do when she saw a spider in her bathroom? she peed.

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"Knock Knock" "Whos there?" "Its Adolf, we're going to camp."

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, your tits are nice

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So a man walks into a bar and says to the bartender I'll have a beer

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How do you confuse a blonde? Tell an Anti-Joke.

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There is a white man, a black guy, and an Asian in a car. It got into an accident who did it? Asian dude

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How many licks does it take to get to the tootsie-roll center of a tootsie pop? It very depending on the amount of saliva produced in ones mouth..

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- Server, there's a hair in my soup ! - You're right, sir, I'll give you another soup imminently.

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When Life gives you lemons... Squeeze the juice right back into Life's eyes!

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What's the difference between a black guy and a wet towel? The towel doesn't kick when you hang it

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What has two thumbs and is very pale? A dead baby.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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