Q: Wanna hear a dirty joke? A: Your mother sucks.

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- Knock Knock - who's there? - Gestapo! open the door!

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You best friend has a bladder disease. You ask him how he got it. He says " I was watching the superbowl and had to go, but I didn't want to miss the commercials. So it was either watching the game and getting a bladder disease that would end up killing me or going to the bathroom . Now you know where i went wrong."

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Dani Barton is a heart breaking 13 yr old.

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what do you call a stupid chav? Gifted

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What did the homeless man get for Christmas? Nothing.

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what happens when you jump of a cliff usually you die

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A businessman notices an attractive woman sitting at the end of the bar so he buys her a drink. She kindly accepts and spends a few minutes making pleasant conversation with him. When she's finished with her drink, she promptly begins to flirt with another man at the bar who's not twenty years older than her and horribly out of shape. The middle-aged businessman, realizing his own mortality, proceeds to spend the rest of the evening drinking himself into vortex of loneliness.

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Why did Little Billy fall off the swing? He got hit by a washing machine.

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Why did the Chicken cross the road? Because chickens can move and the road just happened to be in its path.

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Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: Ronald McDonald was chasing him.

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Roses are Red Violets are Blue I have a Gun Get in the Van

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead. Why did the other monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was stapled to the first. Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? Because he thought it was a game.

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Why is 6 afraid of 7? Because 7, 1, 2 in mod7.

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What is the difference between Batman and a black man? Their skin color and bank accounts.

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Whats Black and hangs from a tree? A Tire(:

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An blind orphan in an impoverished Irish village develops both AIDS and terminal cancer. You laughed a little at that. You are going to hell.

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What noise does a dead dog make ? Nothing its dead

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Chuck Norris' farts are silent and deadly. Deadly because he's Chuck Norris, silent because his butthole is extremely loose

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How do you escape a vicious tiger? You cleverly create a distraction so the tiger's focus is not on you. Then, you quickly run away because the tiger doesn't know you are leaving.

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Lil' Wayne

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why was the boy crying? ... because he had a frog stapled yo his face.

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What is worse than 50 dead babies stapled to trees? One baby stapled to 50 trees. What is worse than one baby stapled to 50 trees? One tree stapled to 50 babies.

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What happened when your mom closed the blinds? You.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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