ROSS G IS OBESE

why did the mexican cross the road? To get into America. Why did the chicken cross the road? It was on its way to warn everyone that the sky was falling Why did the horse go to the other side of the field? He liked green grass. Why did Chuck Norris cross the road? cause he's Chuck Norris. Why did the man get a check in the mail every month? Cause he's black Why did Obama Cross the road? Cause he lost control of congress

1, 2, buckle my shoe. 3, 4, shut the door. 5, 6, I'm gonna to cut you in your sleep.

The mouse and the elephant went to take a bath. They had a nice time.

Why aren't jokes funny in base 8? Because 7, 10, 11.

Whats white and looks like a bunny? a rabbit

Why cant little billy jump? He was aborted.

How many dogs does it take to screw in a light bulb? Dogs do not have aposable thumbs therefore they cannot screw in light bulbs

What do you call a black man who is poor, homeless, and HIV positive? Unlucky.

Q:Why did the booger cross the street? A:Because everyone was picking on him

What do clowns put on bagels? Cream Cheese

A man walks into a bar. The bartender asks what he'd like to drink. The man pulls out his gun, shoots the surprised bartender, and proceeds to execute all the patrons of the bar and finally commit suicide. A post-mortem identification of the man identifies him as a victim of childhood sexual abuse and a diagnosed schizophrenic. There is a nice funeral for all the victims and the media respectfully minimizes exposure of the event.

ask me if i'm a tree. are you a tree? no

Why did the man drink water? Because he was thirsty

Whats worse than 1 dead baby in a bag? Ten dead babies in one bag.

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Jesus walks into a hotel, slams four nails down on the counter, and says, "Put me up for the night!" The concierge looks at him and says, "You're not Jesus. Jesus was brutally murdered approximately 1,970 years ago. And although I may not be a believer, his teachings have brought comfort and solace to millions of people around the world. Nor do we accept nails as payment. Please remove yourself from the premises or I will call security."

Why was the baby upset? Because it accidentally killed its twin brother by pushing it off the bed.

Why couldn't the women drive? She was dead

Why was the woman convicted or arson? She set her house on fire. Why did she set her house on fire? Her husband was beating her.

A. Hey.. B. Hi

What's funnier than Carrot Top and Dane Cook combined? Almost anything.

What is the difference between a mustache, and a pile of dead babies? Mustaches disgust me.

Why did the white guy feel awkward at the black people convention? He didn't know anyone there

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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