Why don`t women need watches? Because in our modern society, there are many clocks in most locations.

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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how do you make a plumber cry Kill his family

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Did you know every 46 seconds somebody commits suicide Thumbs up for pancakes!

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A horse walks into a bar and the bartender says, "Hey pal, why the long face?" The horse neighed.

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A man walks into a psychiatrists office with a banana in his ear, The psychiatrist says, why do you have that banana in your ear. The man says, "What?" The psychiatrist says, "I said, 'Why do you have that banana in your ear?" The man says, "What?" The psychiatrist shouts, "I SAID, WHY DO YOU HAVE THAT BANANA IN YOUR EAR?" The man says, "Sorry, I can't hear you, I'm deaf." (props- Marty Smith)

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So these IRS agents were negotiating a deal.....

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The seven dwarfs were in a sauna feeling happy. So Happy got up and left.

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whats the difference between a nigga and a bucket of shit? the bucket

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How many light bulbs does it take to screw in a dyslexic child.? DAMN

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two men are walking and nobody falls becouse they use a power balance

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Looks through the peephole.

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womens rights

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Todays word of the day, is "legs" lets head back to your place and spread the word....

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What do you call 10 dead babies in a blender? A horrible, horrible child abuse incident.

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What does a squirrel get when it rains? It gets wet.

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your mom is so lesbian that in prder to have you she planted a seed in her vagina because she refused to have sex with a man

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flip flop chop, clip clop cow, POW. hahahahahah. :).

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What is white, wet, sticky, and gets squished out? Glue obviously, wait.... What were you thinking of?

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What did Tarzan say when the monkeys came over the hill? Hey look, the monkeys are coming over the hill.

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Left. That one direction...

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Why was the boy upset? Because he has a frog stapled to his face.

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Penis!

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What did the pornstar say to the priest? i DO porn

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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