What did the burn victim get for Christmas? A book of matches

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John:Why couldn't the T-Rex clay his hands? Billy:Because his arms are too small! John:no he's extinct dumbass

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One time I went into a haunted house. It was just pretend ghosts but then I saw a real ghost there. It was scary.

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How does Michael J. Fox like his Martini? With an Olive

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Wikipedia has no entry on "gullibility."

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What did the black father say to his daughter? you're adopted

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Why did the blind man commit suicide? Cause his wife was so ugly he went blind and become depressed a shot himself...twice.

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why did the mans hair start to get shorter the barber was shaving it!

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how many babies can you fit in a bass drum? 19.

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Bob Bob Bob Bob Bob Bob Bob Bob What What the hell are you doing here

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Roses are blue, Roses are red. Give me your money, Or I'll cut off your head.

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What's funnier than a bus full of burning babies? Nothing.

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-Knock Knock. -Come in.

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Hellen Keller

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whats worse than your brother dying in a car accident? finding out the rest of your family was in there

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Konock Konock Uh, you spelt knock knock wrong... Oh.

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What do you get when you cross a cat with a log? I think the better question is why are you mixing those two things together?

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Amputations.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue. Who the hell named a blue flower "violet"?

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The seven dwarfs were in a sauna feeling happy. So Happy got up and left.

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How many light bulbs does it take to screw in a dyslexic child.? DAMN

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So these IRS agents were negotiating a deal.....

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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Why don`t women need watches? Because in our modern society, there are many clocks in most locations.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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