Whats red and smells like blue paint? Red paint.

Friends are like potatoes. When you eat them, they die.

Why does a trash can smell bad? Because there's trash in it.

What is white, long, and thin? A tablecloth

Why din't the boy get a Christmas present? Because his dad go hit by a bus.

why did the chicken cross the road?? to go shopping for some aspirin because one of his children recently developed a raging headache and it was only logical for him to go to the pharmacy that was conveniantly placed across the road.

Why couldn't Larry walk his dog? Larry doesn't have a dog.

There is this dylectic who can't spell.

What did the burn victim get for Christmas? A book of matches

John:Why couldn't the T-Rex clay his hands? Billy:Because his arms are too small! John:no he's extinct dumbass

One time I went into a haunted house. It was just pretend ghosts but then I saw a real ghost there. It was scary.

How does Michael J. Fox like his Martini? With an Olive

Wikipedia has no entry on "gullibility."

Why did the blind man commit suicide? Cause his wife was so ugly he went blind and become depressed a shot himself...twice.

What did the black father say to his daughter? you're adopted

why did the mans hair start to get shorter the barber was shaving it!

how many babies can you fit in a bass drum? 19.

Bob Bob Bob Bob Bob Bob Bob Bob What What the hell are you doing here

Roses are blue, Roses are red. Give me your money, Or I'll cut off your head.

What's funnier than a bus full of burning babies? Nothing.

Hellen Keller

-Knock Knock. -Come in.

whats worse than your brother dying in a car accident? finding out the rest of your family was in there

What do you get when you cross a cat with a log? I think the better question is why are you mixing those two things together?

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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