roses are brown, violets are brown, who the hell sh** on my garden?

Oprah is black and the richest women in the world!!!

Why can't Hellen Keller drive? Because she is dead.

Q: Why didnt the dinosaurs cross the road? A: Because theyre all dead.

An Asian woman is driving home from work. She gets in an accident and is killed instantly. Her family is traumatized.

An elephant and a rabbit sit on the forest floor and poop. The elephant asks the rabbit " doesn't it annoy you when the poop sticks to your fur?" "no" replies the rabbit. So the elephant picks up the rabbit and wipes his but with him.

Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: 9/11

What do you call a bicycle that likes threesomes. A tricycle

Q: Who won the fight of two black guys and a white guy? A: The black and white guy because two is better than one.

how do u fit 20 jews in a car? 2 in the front and 20 in the ashtray

Your mother is so fat that when she passes in front of the tv, I lose 3 seasons of the series

Your mom is so ugly that your father married her because of emotional, spiritual, and intellectual compatibility, not because of sexual attraction.

Teacher:What is the outer layer of a tree? Dog:Bark. Teacher: What is the square root of 69? Dog:8.30662386

What do you get when you mix a fox and a sloth? a..FOTH

Two black people jump off a cliff. Who hits the ground first? Who cares.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, Cancer.

Q: Your arms are tied and bleeding from your face, a bull is charging at you, a catapult launches a bunch of rottweilers with rabies straight at your face, a nuclear bomb right next to you is five seconds from exploding, and my teleportation device ia right next to you, what do you do? A: You start by getting your own damn teleportation device! The hell ill let you bleed on mine!

Help! I'm locked in a anti-joke factory!

What do you call two gay men playfully wrestling? Immature.

What does a Jew do when he sees a masked man at his door? He grabs a phone to alert the police and hides in his bedroom.

"Why is Barney green and purple?" "Because the producers of the show decided to make him that way."

A man walks into a bar. The bartender says "why the long face?" He says, "I have acromegaly"

Why was the black man excited when he found a $20 bill on the ground? -Anyone would be excited

Why did Kanye West hit Rihanna? He didn't. It was Chris Brown you dumb ****

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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