How do you keep an extraordinary magician from performing his show? Replace his shampoo with battery acid

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A:Will you be my valentine? B:No

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Your mom is so stupid she had a hard time graduating high school.

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Why can't the dinosaur eat M&M's? He is dead. He used to rule the Earth 65 Million years ago, though. Dinosaurs are reptiles. Whales are not. Meow?

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Knock Knock It's Open!

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Two black people jump off a cliff. Who hits the ground first? Who cares.

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Why did the manager fire his black employee? Because he was stealing office supplies. Why was he stealing office supplies? Because he needed the money for his family. Why did he need that money? Because he wasn't being paid his full wage. Why wasn't he being paid full wage? Because his employer was a racist. Upon this analysis, the state of California ruled the case of Jones vs. Smith in favour of Mr. Jones, and ordered Mr. Smith to give Mr. Jones a cash settlement of $500,000. However, Mr. Jones was still convicted with a single charge of petty theft and was sentenced to six months in prison. His family was still awarded the settlement of $500,000. Mr. Jones made parole three months early for being an "idol inmate."

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What's white and can't climb a tree? A refridgerator What's white heavy and if it fell out of a tree it would kill you? A polar bear

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Knock Knock Who's There? Ram My Penis Into Ram My Penis Into Who? Me.

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What's worse than being swallowed by a blue whale? Being swallowed by a bule whale with herpes.

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Q: why couldn't the pirate boy get into the movie? A: the movie was rated R and the pirate boy was only 14 years old, and he didn't have any adult supervision, which prevented him from entering the movie.

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Why did Jimmy fail his math test? Because he had a mental disability

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What happened to Jim. He died his funeral is tomorrow.

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Whats funnier than 24? 25

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Funny joke to play on an elderly woman: Take her cane and push her In front of a bus.

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your mom is so black that it can be assumed she is of african descent

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If I was black, I wouldn't be white.

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chuck norris is meeeeean to pain.

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What do you say to a man who isnt funny You're not fuuny

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Roses are red Violets are blue Billy is dead and Atom bombs blow up chines $

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what was sad about six black guys driving off a cliff in a cadallac? They were my friends

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To go fishing.

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What's worst that the Holocaust? Another one.

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What's worse than locking your keys in ur at outside of an abortion clinic? Going in side and asking for a coat hanger!!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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