Why couldn't Helen Keller drive? Because she was a woman...

"luke Bastiaan" "So, whens your period?"

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because chickens are not very intelligent and was scared by a shadow. The chicken's survival instincts caused it to cross the road, away from the shadow. The chicken crossed the road safely, and is now happily pecking at worms.

Q:what do you call a black guy with a gun A:racial equality in our nations armed forces

If olive oil is made of olives, calculate the mass of the sun.

Wanna hear a joke? A joke.

wheres a good place to find funny jokes? anti-joke.com

Will my son live, doctor? No because you don't have a son and I am not a doctor

A man walks into a psychiatrists office with a banana in his ear, The psychiatrist says, why do you have that banana in your ear. The man says, "What?" The psychiatrist says, "I said, 'Why do you have that banana in your ear?" The man says, "What?" The psychiatrist shouts, "I SAID, WHY DO YOU HAVE THAT BANANA IN YOUR EAR?" The man says, "Sorry, I can't hear you, I'm deaf." (props- Marty Smith)

how do make a condom fly around the room? Piss it off!

im a selling a car

I am not racist, racism is a crime! Crime is for black people.

What do you get when you mix a fox and a sloth? a..FOTH

A Jew and a Muslim are sitting in a bar. The Muslim asks the Jew for some money to buy a drink. The Jew said, "how much?" The Muslim said, "$7.00" The Jew then said, "yes."

how do u fit 20 jews in a car? 2 in the front and 20 in the ashtray

Why did the girl fall off the swing? Someone threw a fridge at her...

How did shaniqua fall of the hill? because the diabito truck ran her over

That moment when you touch your balls then sniff your fingers and realize it smells good.

if it takes skill to trip over a flat surface, i have no skill...

A man eats a piece of fried chicken A chicken that was days before retirement and had a pregnant wife and two children to look after

What's black on top and white on bottom? Rape.

Why is the world round? The early earth was molten, and a liquid in a vacuum subject only to its own gravitational forces will assume the shape of a sphere. Gases will behave in the same manner. The effects of the sun and other planets, plus the rotational effect have caused the earth to assume a round shape.

what did the orphan say to the adults wanting to adopt him? i hope u will provide well living conditions because i have lost both of my parents and am forced to live off one meal a day

a dragon walks into a bar. the bartender says "stop it". the dragon eats the bartender.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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