What do you call a blond harvesting penuts a penut farmer.

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What's black, white, and red all over? A penguin getting crushed by a sledgehammer.

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Do you want to hear a joke? Yes? Well that's probably why you came to this site.

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A person walked into a bar, he saw it was the wrong bar so he leaves...

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Why did the bird fall out of the tree? Because it was dead. Why did the squirrel fall out of the tree? Because he was stapled to the bird

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Yourrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr soo uglyyyyyy

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What's green and if it falls out of a tree it kills you? A pool table.

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How many jews can you fit in a car? That depends on the volume of the car and the size of the people involved - different cars are of different sizes and can fit a different number of people. For instance, you could probably fit more than 20 midget jews in a van but you could probably not fit as many overweight jews in a coupé. However if you put some effort into getting as many standard sized people, in this case jews for reasons unknown, into a standard size sedan you should be able to fit about seven or eight in the car itself and one in the trunk, making a total of nine or ten.

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What is green and red and spins around? A frog in a blender

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How do you find the population of Mexico? You take a census count by mail and/or a door to door questionnaire.

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Two cougars are at a nightclub. Suddenly, they attack and 8 patrons are mauled to death.

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What did dean carmon say to his brother? - I don't know I'm not his brother

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An Irishman walks into a bar. He quickly exits as he thought it was the Polish restaurant located directly nextdoor. He then enters the Polish restaurant and orders a delicious lunch. He tips his waiter 20%.

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roses are red, violets are violet

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Roses are bright, Violets are sad, I like sprite I'm really struggling for ideas at this point

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The seven dwarfs were in a sauna feeling happy. So Happy got up and left.

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Roses are red Violtes are Blue Sugar is Sweet and salt is salty

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Q: what's black, white and red all over A: a penguin in a blender

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What's funnier than a bus full of burning babies? Nothing.

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Whats the difference between a blonde and a mosquito? A blonde is a Homo sapien (Latin for knowing man), a primate species of mammal with a highly developed brain, belonging to the family of great apes, along with chimpanzees, bonobos, gorillas, and orangutans . A mosquito on the other hand is a common insect in the family Culicidae (from the Latin culex meaning midge or gnat).

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How are Steve Jobs and The iPhone the same? They got progressively thinner over time.

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What do you call putting a toad in the microwave? Animal cruelty.

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Two black people fall off a cliff, who hits the ground first? Who Cares?

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Why are black people so good at sports? Because there black.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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