Q: why couldn't the pirate boy get into the movie? A: the movie was rated R and the pirate boy was only 14 years old, and he didn't have any adult supervision, which prevented him from entering the movie.

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dave lee travis walks into a radio station , plays some records , talks randomly , and a good time is had by all.

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A man walks into a doctor's office, he pees in a cup and is diagnosed with diabetes.

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Two black people jump off a cliff. Who hits the ground first? Who cares.

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Two Jewish kids walked into a bar... mitzvot.

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What's wrong with four black people in a cadillac driving off a cliff? The Cadillac holds 5

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Why don't Polish women use vibrators? They are extremely conservative Catholics.

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What is more tragic than a nice day wasted? Obesity.

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Q:What are black basketball players good at? A:Running,shooting and stealing.

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Funny joke to play on an elderly woman: Take her cane and push her In front of a bus.

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Why did the dad buy his son some ice cream? He didnt, his dad is dead

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I was on Skype with a girl yesterday and she asked "Do you want to see something?" "No," I said "my mom's in the room and she might get a bad interpretation." "I really want you to see this." She said. " No, my mom's still in the room, she'll think I'm weird if you turn out the lights." "Darn I really wanted to see your glow in the dark snuggie."

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One jew, three Canadians and a Dutch man walk into the bar. The jew buys a beer for the Dutch guy, then the Dutch guy responds with.. "Thank you."

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Q: How do you fit 20 babies into a bowl? A: A blender. Q: How do you get them out? A: Tortilla chips.

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What did the fox say to the blonde? "Hello". The girl then captured the fox and sold it to the government.

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why did the mexican cross the road? To get into America. Why did the chicken cross the road? It was on its way to warn everyone that the sky was falling Why did the horse go to the other side of the field? He liked green grass. Why did Chuck Norris cross the road? cause he's Chuck Norris. Why did the man get a check in the mail every month? Cause he's black Why did Obama Cross the road? Cause he lost control of congress

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1500 Jews were ordered to walk along a straight path whilst in the midst of a blizzard. How close did they ever get to the end? What end? They marched until every last bit of their rotten flesh was driven from their weak bodies. --ZeNaziGermanDoctor

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This is "Eliza" holy shit! I almost gave up and went to a party assuming you guys had simply skipped the reply. Please tell me nothing of this is written in code, because I have no fucking idea how to decipher it... ...To think that so few consider Nero a hero for all that he has done, and so many have come to hate him and still follow his advice basically abusing him. I told my sister to use mom`s cellphone to call and warn as many as possible, telling them to spread the word, is Nero7 Going to make it? He mentioned a barfight starting over nothing during new years eve. I know that some of the members where planning to use his own teachings in order to overthrow him, I warned him but he was fully aware already but did nothing for some reason. Yet none of them have the assets to do anything like this... Should I start calling all those members that left during Nero7`s "sudden paranoia period?" Many of them have political authority and can be of help if we can somehow convince them. Respond Asap, and if Nero7 is in a public hospital, then get him the hell out of there, he is an exposed target for anyone, if he gets killed, ill fucking kill you you hear me!

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What did the Black guy say to the White Rapper? I really like your music.

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Why didn't the boy finish his homework? He was in a coma.

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The fitting room is a lie. Nothing fit me at all.

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I like vagina, hahahahah!!!!!!!!!!

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Why Was my mommy gone last night? -cause I ****ed her

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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