What did Helen Keller say to the priest? Nothing, she didn't know he was there.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

What did the Catholic Priest do to the 9-year-old boy? He ate him. The priest was actually Jeffery Dahmer.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Why did the little girl fall off of the swing? She didn't have any arms.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

why are niggers afraid of the dark ? because they think that darkness is the only black thing there

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Whats worse than getting in a 30 MPH car accident? Getting in a 40 MPH car accident.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Question: How many rocks does it take to make a pancake? Answer: Tree.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

MICHAEL

thumb_up thumb_down +10

What's worse than biting into your apple and finding a worm in it? Biting into you apple and finding two worms in it.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Why did the chicken cross the road? To warn people on the other side that the sky was falling

thumb_up thumb_down +10

A white man bumps into an Asian man while walking down the street. They have a brief chat. As they part ways, the white man says, "Facebook me!" The Asian man replies, "Due to my socio-economic situation I cannot currently afford an Internet service." So they exchange telephone numbers.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Why was the jewish girl happy? Her pussy was wet!

thumb_up thumb_down +10

My Japanese girlfriend left me the other day... I am now depressed and have resorted to comfort eating.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because chickens are not very intelligent and was scared by a shadow. The chicken's survival instincts caused it to cross the road, away from the shadow. The chicken crossed the road safely, and is now happily pecking at worms.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

A woman is home washing her dishes when she suddenly slips banging her head on a cabinet. She passed out for a few seconds, then woke to find a great gash on her left cheek, fairly spurting blood. At the emergency room, the doctor asks, "How did this happen?" The woman replied, "My boy friend tried to drown me."

thumb_up thumb_down +10

A: Knock knock knock B: "Who's there?" A: Knock knock knock B: "Who's there!?" A: Knock knock knock B: "God dammit who's there!?" A: "Penny?"

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Susie has Autism

thumb_up thumb_down +8

how do u fit 20 jews in a car? 2 in the front and 20 in the ashtray

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Why was the black man hanged? He was charged with piracy in the 1500s..

thumb_up thumb_down +8

who smells? •Liam

thumb_up thumb_down +8

What's worse than an empty bottle of Yoohoo? Literally nothing.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

if it takes skill to trip over a flat surface, i have no skill...

thumb_up thumb_down +8

9/11

thumb_up thumb_down +8

When I was at the beach digging in the sand I looked down and someone said nehow

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Knock, Knock. Who's there? Doctor. Doctor Who, Your Doctor, you have 5 months to live

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops