A shark walks into a bar and the bartender says why the long face. The shark replies i dont have cancer just a terrible drinking problem.

What does a squirrel get when it rains? It gets wet.

Todays word of the day, is "legs" lets head back to your place and spread the word....

Penis!

Why was the boy upset? Because he has a frog stapled to his face.

Why is poop brown? Because you're a shit.

What did the pornstar say to the priest? i DO porn

Why did the penguin go to the cookie shop? He didn't, penguins don't eat cookies

Left. That one direction...

What did Tarzan say when the monkeys came over the hill? Hey look, the monkeys are coming over the hill.

What is white, wet, sticky, and gets squished out? Glue obviously, wait.... What were you thinking of?

What do you call a Mexican named Chicee? Chicee

Whats the difference between peanut butter and jam? I can't peanut butter my dick into someones ass

What do you call a dead blonde in a closet? A rape victim.

what do you call an icy road? dangerous.

Hi, my name is Mark and I have dead babies in my garage... Just kidding. My name is not Mark.

How many rats live in a llamas stomach? the cats pajamas

Why did the black man die? Why didn't the black man die?

What smells like marjuana and is black? A black man smoking weed

What do you see when the Pillsbury Dough Boy bends over? I don't know, I don't look when he bends over because I don't like him like that. He's just a friend, that's all.

You know what I hate long anti-jokes that take up too much space.

Who taught Chuck Norris? -Chuck Norris

Obama enters a KKK meeting Obama: Oh sorry I thought this was the Kentucky Fried Chicken... the font was so small so... as he starts backing off scared... KKK: leader, of course Mr.President, feel free to come again anytime! Moral: Kings Knocking Ketchup is actually a nice place if you not unlike me enjoy ketchup...

Why did the basketball player shoot the ball? Because it was being mean to him

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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