What do you call a black person with a million dollars? A millionaire.

Why is poop brown? Because you're a shit.

josh roberts you speccy cuunt

What do you call putting a toad in the microwave? Animal cruelty.

What did one deer say to the other? Nothing. The second deer was killed while they were eating and now the first deer is scarred dot life.

A man walks in a bar. He walks out.

What sucks?

How do you put an elephant in a fridge? Open the door and put it in. How to you put a giraffe in a fridge? Open the door, take out the elephant and put in the giraffe. Simba hosts an animal convention and all the animals attend except which? The giraffe. There is an alligator infested lake. How do you cross? Swim across. All the alligator are at the convention.

Du bist mein Kampf

Hellen Keller

A seal walks into a club.

What do a duck and an elephant have in common? They're both yellow. Except for the elephant.

Why is the horse gay. He rapes 3 children

You are driving a bus. At the first stop, 12 people get on and 7 get off At the second stop, 13 people get on and 11 get off At the third stop, 7 people get off the bus. You turn the bus off get out and go home.

Me: "Dad! Can you make me a sandwich?" Dad: "Poof! You are now a sandwich."

Has anyone told you, you look fat today?" "Because you don't.

Mary had a little lamb, the doctor fainted.

What do you call a black person that went to medical school? A doctor

A man went to the doctor and told him he was having the strangest dream. "First I was a tee pee Then I was a wigwam A tee pee, a wigwam. Do you have any idea what could be wrong?" The doctor looked at the man and said "You have aids."

Knock knock? Who's there? Orange. Orange who? Knock knock? Who's there? Orange. Orange WHO? Knock knock? WHO'S THERE?! Orange Williams. Sorry, I suffer from debilitating OCD.

A mushroom walks into a crowded bar, the bartender says "we don't serve your kind here." Protestingly, the mushroom replies, "why not? I am a spore reproducing eukaryote!" Everyone stares as an awkward silence ensues.

What did the black man say when he received cold fried chicken at a restaurant? He very politely asked for it to be warmed up, and exuded nothing but elegance and class.

How do you make a homeless man cry? you throw away his trash.

What is the difference between a hore and a wife? The hore serves you...

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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