What do you call 2 midgets and a pencil rolling down a hill? Satan

Knock knock Whose there? you you who you know who you are

A man goes to lie down on a couch. His wife walks by and sees him, and asks, "what are you doing?" to which he replies, "lying down"

Agricultural production fell significantly.

Whats red and smells like blue paint? Red paint.

why did the chicken cross the road?? to go shopping for some aspirin because one of his children recently developed a raging headache and it was only logical for him to go to the pharmacy that was conveniantly placed across the road.

Paul Dylan King!

A person walked into a bar, he saw it was the wrong bar so he leaves...

what do you call a Ukranian woman without a visa? my maid

What did the wise old widow across the street get for Hanukkah? Cardiac Arrest.

a little girl is playing outside of her house when i man in a van approaches her and stops to ask if the girl will help him find his puppy and that he has some gandy. seeing as the girl has a great love for animals she gets in the van. the man and the little girl drive around until they find the puppy. the man is so overjoyed her rewards the girl with candy. he then drives her back to her house and she feels wonderful having helped the man find his puppy. the end.

How does Michael J. Fox like his Martini? With an Olive

What's another name for a black priest? An African American Priest.

Since little kids sleep with stuffed bears, do bears sleep with stuffed humans?

A squirrel walks up to a tree and says, " I forgot to store nuts for winter and now I am dead." Its funny because the squirrel gets dead.

What do you call a one eyed hippo? A do-you-think-he-potamus

what do you call cheese that isn't yours? cheese.

John:Why couldn't the T-Rex clay his hands? Billy:Because his arms are too small! John:no he's extinct dumbass

There once was a rose that was red Violets are blue Knock Know who's there? Man I gotta quit huffing glue

Shit happens. Correction: feces happens.

Do you know what a deaf guy says to a blind guy? God told me you'll see your path.

Your argument is invalid, but I will allow you your opinion nonetheless.

What do you call a bird on the beach? A seagull.

Yo mama so fat,we are all very concerned for her health.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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