Why did the man drink water? Because he was thirsty

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What do you call a black guy driving a plane? Jamal

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Two cougars are at a nightclub. Suddenly, they attack and 8 patrons are mauled to death.

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Why couldn't JImmy walk to school? A:Jimmy is in a wheelchair.

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Why couldn't Roger become an astronaut? Because Roger's a toaster.

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suck my dick.

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DIIIIIIIIIEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEDIEDIEDIEIDEIDIEIDEIIDIE DIE all of you Hahahaha

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Roses are bright, Violets are sad, I like sprite I'm really struggling for ideas at this point

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Roses are red, Violets are blue. Who the hell named a blue flower "violet"?

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Why did Jenny fail her photography class? Because Jenny has epilepsy and she had a coma while taking the final exam? To this day Jenny is drain dead in the hospital.

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-Knock Knock. -Come in.

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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The Charlotte bobcats.

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Pickles

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An Asian oceanographer went scuba diving in the Pacific Ocean. Three days later the coast guard found his remains torn apart by sharks.

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World Peace

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who can jump higher than mount everest? anyone. mount everest cant jump

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Justin Beiber does not have a really good voice.

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whats worse than your brother dying in a car accident? finding out the rest of your family was in there

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How are eagles and jellyfish the same? They both fly but jellyfish don't.

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whats the difference between a nigga and a bucket of shit? the bucket

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Did you know every 46 seconds somebody commits suicide Thumbs up for pancakes!

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Chuck Norris can get a nuke in Black Ops.

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How many Jews does it take to screw in a lightbulb. Two. But it would have to be a very big lightbulb to fit both of them in there.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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