How does Michael J. Fox like his Martini? With an Olive

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Why did the black guy go to jail, because he did illegal stuff.

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how many babies can you fit in a bass drum? 19.

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What did the boy do when he was cold? Got a blanket.

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What is the biggest lie in the universe? I love you.

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What do people do in France when they are hungry? Get something to eat.

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What comes to mind when you say the word "Mind?" Your Mind

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why did Max cry??? chicken

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World Peace

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Q: How many cantaloupes can you fit into Jackie Chan's basement? A: 4

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Why did the bartender kick out the three jews at midnight? Because the bar closes at 11.

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Yo mama so stupid she stole free bread.

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Q: Whats more fun that nailing babys to a fence? A: Ripping them off.

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What do you call a bird with wings? Redundant.

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Why is Digimon better than Pokemon? It has a better story and character development.

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Ask me if I'm a horse. Are you a horse? Nay.

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a man runs into a bar and screams, he is sent to a doctor for a minor concussion and receives some stitches. He recovers over time and gets on with his life.

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What's the best part of having a doctor for a best friend? The sex.

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Why do they call it a clock radio?... because it's both.

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Knock, Knock. Who's there? The wind. The wind who? ...

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What did the man from Hiroshima see when he looked up at the sky on August 6th, 1945? Some birds.

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A zucchini is walking down the street, when he spots a cucumber club on his left hand side. Having nothing else to do he decides to walk in. When he walks into the club all of the cucumbers stop and stare at this strange being in their club. Finally, after having one too many drinks, one cucumber decides that this ridiculousness has gone on long enough and it is up to him to say something, so he goes up to the zucchini and says, "Hey buddy, what's your problem, clearly you are in a cucumber club and you're a zucchini." The zucchini just looks at him, puzzled, and responds " A cucumber club? I thought this was a ucumber club!!!!!"... It's funny because zucchinis are dyslexic.

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Why is poop brown? Because you're a shit.

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Why don`t women need watches? Because in our modern society, there are many clocks in most locations.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops