John:Why couldn't the T-Rex clay his hands? Billy:Because his arms are too small! John:no he's extinct dumbass

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Knock knock. Who's there? You're adopted.

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A man was building a new kitchen for his wife. Just as he was installing the sink, his wife comes running into the kitchen and starts cursing. "What's the matter?" he asks. "Don't you like the new sink?" His wife replies, "I love it. But come quick, there's a spider in the living room!" The man walks over with a paper towel, grabs the spider, and throws it into the garbage. The wife looks at the husband, smiling, and says, "Thanks."

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead.

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I always tell people " I have the heart of a child! " Then I continue "It's in a jar on my desk"

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How did the chicken cross the road? By foot.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

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Q: what's black, white and red all over A: a penguin in a blender

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Roses are red, Violets are blue. Who the hell named a blue flower "violet"?

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What do you get when you cross a cat with a log? I think the better question is why are you mixing those two things together?

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Have you heard the story of the empty room? Theres nothing in it.

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Why are black people so good at sports? Because there black.

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What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? -Hey! Where's my tractor?

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Q:What are black people so good at basketball? A: Because they are black!

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skjer;nf;oashfaefaohesf oiqeshLACLAHN IS SUTRP SD] make it shorett and swert

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Q: Where do you find a dog with no legs? A: Probably right where you left him, since animals with no appendages have no way of mobility

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How are Steve Jobs and The iPhone the same? They got progressively thinner over time.

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Justin Beiber does not have a really good voice.

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World Peace

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your mom is so lesbian that in prder to have you she planted a seed in her vagina because she refused to have sex with a man

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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Q: What did the hobo get for his birthday? A: Older.

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Penis!

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How did the blond die? Substance abuse

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops