What did the Leah say to the Pawneez? AWWWW YEAHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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where do you get virgin wool from? ugly sheep.

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Wats wet and salty and people on the west coast get covered in it? Sweat.

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Q. On a scale of 1-100, how immature are you? A. 69.

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Why can't Hellen Keller drive? Because she is dead.

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That moment when you touch your balls then sniff your fingers and realize it smells good.

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A jew, a catholic and an atheist are in the desert. They see a dusty lamp. They take it and rub it. Once the lamp is clean, they put it back on the sand and kep walking.

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Whats white, and edible? white chocolate

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D is for diabetes, Cookie Monster, if you keep this up.

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If olive oil is made of olives, calculate the mass of the sun.

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What did the poor guy get for christmas? The homeless guy.

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how do you kill a mexican? make him go to the cicus

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Did you hear about Judith? she was hit by a bus!

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what did the cheese say to the wall? nothing cheese can't talk.

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Q: why did a sanke have a rattle A: it was born wiith it

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A boy and his father are in a car crash. The father dies and the son is transported to the nearest hospital. Once there, a surgeon is brought in to operate on the boy. The surgeon steps back and says "I can't operate on this boy, I haven't had enough training for such a situation." The hospital calls in another surgeon and they are more qualified for the event. Then the surgeon wakes up and realizes the boy is in critical condition. There is blood drenching his shirt and there is only seconds to operate. Suddenly, the boy wakes up and realizes he has just survived a car crash. Suddenly Leonardo DeCaprio enters with a girl. The world turns on its side and they all wake up to find them selves a victim of Inception. Then the caterpillar wakes up and realizes it has immense mental capacity, even above those of an above-average human. Then I woke up and realized I lost my job. MLIA.

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why did the mexican cross the road? To get into America. Why did the chicken cross the road? It was on its way to warn everyone that the sky was falling Why did the horse go to the other side of the field? He liked green grass. Why did Chuck Norris cross the road? cause he's Chuck Norris. What do you call a man who gets a check in the mail every month for nothing? black

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So this guy drunk guy pokes this girl. 4 months later the girl has a misscarrage.

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Whats worse than scraping your elbow and knee? Beheading and disembowlment.

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A priest and a rabbi walk into a mosque.

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How many Amish people does it take to change a light bulb? None because they don't believe in technology.

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How many beans are in a soup? Who cares i'm starving, Lets Eat!!!

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Guy 1: Are you alright? Guy 2: No, i'm half left!

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How many atheists does it take to change a lightbulb? One.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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