What do you call a black man flying a plane? The Pilot.

-Knock knock -Go away -*Breaks door and shoots*

A patient walks into a clinic and says, "Doctor, Doctor! I feel like a pair of curtains!" The doctor replies, "I have no interest in whether or not you feel like purchasing items to spruce up your home."

What do you call a horse, a cow, a pig, a sheep, a dog, a cat, and a mouse all walking in a straight line? Animals

What did the Queen of England say when here servant died? Another one bites the dust!

What's funnier than Man on Woman domestic abuse? Nothing.

Q: Who won the fight of two black guys and a white guy? A: The black and white guy because two is better than one.

Why didn't the man kiss his wife. Because he had no lips.

im a selling a car

A homeless boy walks up to a woman. "I'm hungry" "Then you should eat something."

Why did the little girl fall off of the swing? She didn't have any arms.

A Jew and a Muslim are sitting in a bar. The Muslim asks the Jew for some money to buy a drink. The Jew said, "how much?" The Muslim said, "$7.00" The Jew then said, "yes."

Why does smokey bears wife never have kids? Because every time she gets hot smokey beats he with a shovel

That moment when you touch your balls then sniff your fingers and realize it smells good.

Why didn't the bear go snowboarding? It was hibernating

Y did a fat woman cross the rode? To get to McDonalds

a dragon walks into a bar. the bartender says "stop it". the dragon eats the bartender.

Why was the black man hanged? He was charged with piracy in the 1500s..

Where do rabbais go to shop? At the supermarket like everyone else.

Your mother is so ugly that your father no lomger finds her attractive

Norm Macdonald's roast of Bob Saget.

Enchilada

To mamas so fat shes fat

"Why is Barney green and purple?" "Because the producers of the show decided to make him that way."

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...