what do you call a fish without eyes? a fshhhhh

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Why did the car suddenly stop? It was at a redlight.

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Knock Knock Who's there? It's the mailman delivering your weekly delivery

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What do you call a puppy with no eyes? Ugly,

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What do you call a pickle with a cape? A pickle with a cape

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Why are elephants big, grey, and wrinkled? Because if they were small, white, and round they'd be called aspirin.

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Have you ever tried ethiopian food? No. Neither have they

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what do you call an overweight 80 year old white man trying to be a pimp ? Mr.Fredrickson

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What do you call a person with no eyes? Blind.

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Why did the tomato blush? It didn't - red is the natural colour for ripe tomatoes.

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What do you call 2 midgets and a pencil rolling down a hill? Satan

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Why did the chicken cross the street? It didn't. It got hit by a car.

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A man goes to lie down on a couch. His wife walks by and sees him, and asks, "what are you doing?" to which he replies, "lying down"

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What do you call a Mexican baptism? A blessed occasion.

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Agricultural production fell significantly.

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Whats red and smells like blue paint? Red paint.

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Roses are red. Violets are red. Everything is red. I soaked it in the blood of small children.

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Paul Dylan King!

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what do you call a Ukranian woman without a visa? my maid

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A person walked into a bar, he saw it was the wrong bar so he leaves...

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What did the wise old widow across the street get for Hanukkah? Cardiac Arrest.

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Friends are like trees. They fall down when you hit them with an ax.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops