A blind man walks into a bar....and a chair....and a table....and a wall....and a person... etc.

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What do you get when you cross a cat with a log? I think the better question is why are you mixing those two things together?

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Q: What kills millions of people each year and sneaks up behind you unexpectedly? A: HIV/AIDS

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Whats the difference between a blonde and a mosquito? A blonde is a Homo sapien (Latin for knowing man), a primate species of mammal with a highly developed brain, belonging to the family of great apes, along with chimpanzees, bonobos, gorillas, and orangutans . A mosquito on the other hand is a common insect in the family Culicidae (from the Latin culex meaning midge or gnat).

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Whats the difference between a watermelon and a black person? Ones fun to hit with a baseball bat, and ones a watermelon.

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A man walks into a psychiatrists office with a banana in his ear, The psychiatrist says, why do you have that banana in your ear. The man says, "What?" The psychiatrist says, "I said, 'Why do you have that banana in your ear?" The man says, "What?" The psychiatrist shouts, "I SAID, WHY DO YOU HAVE THAT BANANA IN YOUR EAR?" The man says, "Sorry, I can't hear you, I'm deaf." (props- Marty Smith)

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Why couldn't the 10 year old see the Pirate Movie? Because he was dead...

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Q: Whats more fun that nailing babys to a fence? A: Ripping them off.

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How do you kill a retard? Slit his throat.

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who can jump higher than mount everest? anyone. mount everest cant jump

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Whats worse than getting mugged? Getting mugged twice.

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Q: How many cantaloupes can you fit into Jackie Chan's basement? A: 4

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you know what they say about people with big feet, they have big feet...

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The grass is always greener on the give me a blowjob.

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what did the ruler say to the other ruler your a ruler

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Q:What are black people so good at basketball? A: Because they are black!

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What has two wheels, two arms, and a head? A man in a wheelchair. Why was he in a wheelchair? He stepped on a landmine. A man walks, I'm sorry rolled, into a bar.

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Why did the penguin go to the cookie shop? He didn't, penguins don't eat cookies

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What did the bus driver say to the black man? I like your shoes.

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what do you call an icy road? dangerous.

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Wanna Hear A Joke ? Afgan

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What's a ghost favourite colour? Ghosts don't exist.

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how do you make a plumber cry Kill his family

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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