Hi, my name is Mark and I have dead babies in my garage... Just kidding. My name is not Mark.

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what's worse than one scoop of ice crea falling on the floor? - the holocaust what's worse than two scoops of ice cream falling on the floor? - nothing

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1234 5

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What do you see when the Pillsbury Dough Boy bends over? I don't know, I don't look when he bends over because I don't like him like that. He's just a friend, that's all.

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You know what I hate long anti-jokes that take up too much space.

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Why did the black man die? Why didn't the black man die?

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What do you get if your mailman drops your letter in black paint? Blackmail

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what do you call an icy road? dangerous.

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What did the bus driver say to the black man? I like your shoes.

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whats worse than fining 7 dead babies in 1 trash can? finding 1 dead baby in 7 trashcans!

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what does a nazi and the witch from hansel and gretal have in common, they both put people in ovens.

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there's two nuns cycling down a cobbled street. one nun says:ooo iv'e never been this way before! the other nun says:i'm not surprised there's roadworks and a diversion!

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What goes gurgle, gurgle, gurgle, POP! A baby in a microwave.

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what's white on top and black on the bottom? Society

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Me: "Dad! Can you make me a sandwich?" Dad: "Poof! You are now a sandwich."

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Ask me if I'm in a tree? No.

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Today, we will be identifying power tools. This is not a drill.

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Do you know what's funnier than 24? 25

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What do you call a Jew on a rollercoaster? A Jew on a rollercoaster.

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A: Knock knock! A: Who's there? A: Forever A: Forever who? A: Forever Alone

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What do you call a bicycle that likes threesomes. A tricycle

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Why did the Jew pick a dollar off the ground? He dropped it.

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A mushroom walks into a crowded bar, the bartender says "we don't serve your kind here." Protestingly, the mushroom replies, "why not? I am a spore reproducing eukaryote!" Everyone stares as an awkward silence ensues.

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What's the difference between Paris Hilton and a cow? Cows are ruminants, meaning that they have a digestive system that allows use of otherwise indigestible foods by regurgitating and rechewing them as "cud". Paris Hilton, on the other hand, is a human being. Therefore, her stomach digests the bolus (masticated food) only after it has exited the oesophagus into the body of the organ, where it is digested into chyme and then passed through the pyloric sphincter into the duodenum.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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