I walked into town today and bumped into a butcher, a baker and a candlestick maker. It meant nothing to me because I was never read nursery rhymes as a child due to my parents both dying before I was conceived

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Why did the lady spill her coffee? The waiter accidently ran into her and then apologized.

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What do you cal a black boy with a bike? A thief

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Cornbread ain't nothin wrong with that.

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"Hello." "Hi."

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What is 10 inches long and didnt get sucked on valentines day? Whitney Houston's crack pipe.

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A guy walks into a restaurant and sits down only to realize he is not wearing any pants. Immediately the police are called and arrest the man for indecent exposure. Given there were children in the restaurant at the time, the man is also charged as level 3 sex offender and is held on $100,000 bail. His family receives the news and become the talk of the town. His wife commits suicide from embarrassment, leaving her 10 year old son up for adoption who later gets involved with drugs due to his rough childhood.

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What's funnier than 24? 25.

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"Knock, Knock" "Who's there?" "Banana." "Banana who?" "Knock Knock" "Who's there?" "Banana." "Banana who?" "Knock, Knock" "Who's there?" "Banana." "Banana who?" "Knock, Knock" "Who's there?" "The police. We're looking for three escaped inmates posing as bananas."

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Knock Knock Who's there? It's the mailman delivering your weekly delivery

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Whats worse then finding a worm in your apple? getting fisted by hulk

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The burgler walked into the house. Nobody noticed the initial intrusion. The burgler quickly left. The family of which was stolen from woke up the next day and enjoyed a hearty breakfast of grains, oats, and barley without a worry on anyone's mind.

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My aunt used to say slow and steady wins the race she died in a fire

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The lemons on the tree are ripe. They will be picked.

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Why did the jelly baby go to school? Because he was brought up in a middle class background and wanted a full education to further his future career

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A penguin was waddling along one day and saw a seal.. The seal stood up and procceded to talk and jump and even twirled around... The penguin realized this was impossible for a seal to be doing this so he hopped on his unicycle and just rode home because he was going to be late for his piano recital

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Why did the young boy say "Fuck"? He has Tourrete's

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Knock knock. Who's there? Becca. I just found out i have aids, so you should probably get yourself checked out.

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why would you thank the KKK because they killed the president

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Why didn't the blonde get into college? She was killed in a car accident.

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Ken: Your dog is sick, he needs to see a vet. Megan: Omg, what is it? Ken: It's a medical person who treats animals.

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Paul Dylan King!

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First kid: my name is bob second kid: ok First kid: Now tell me what my name is?? second kid: bob First kid: HOW did you know???

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What's another name for a black priest? An African American Priest.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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