Will you marry me?

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Why didn't Jimmy's mum come to the school play? She had a heart attack

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A UNIX guru walks in to a restaurant and asks for day's special. Waiter responds "tartar steak." UNIX guru thinks that "steak.tar.tar just doesn't make any sense" and responds "I'll just have tar steak."

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who hooked up with Sinead Walker? • Liam Findlay

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A man walks into a bar and says, "Ouch!" The other bar patrons ask him what is wrong, to which he replies, "I stubbed my toe."

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CHICKEN it is a chickenly chickeny food we eat WRONG

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What do you call a man with no arms and no legs in the middle of the ocean? SOL.

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guy walks into a bar a metal bar ouch

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Having lost his job, wife, and general sanity, he resorted to suicide by car accident.

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What do you call a fat Chinese person? A chunk.

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Yo mamma is so fat, when Dracula bit her, he got type 2 diabetes.

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What's green and has wheels? Grass, I lied about the wheels

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You:why did the kid get a massage? Guest:Why? You:Cuz he wanted one.

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A black, asian, and white guy jump off a building, who lands first? Well, according to newton's law of gravitation every massive particle in the universe attracts every other massive particle with a force that is directly proportional to the product of their masses and inversely proportional to the square of the distance between them. It depends on who weighs the most

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What time did the tennis start? Tennish

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the your face joke

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 recently got out of prison for violent rape.

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How so you find out if a black woman is pregnant? Have her take a pregnancy test

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Q: How many Jew does it take to change a light bulb? Here is the answer: A: A lightbulb cannot be changed, it either is or isn't. Do you mean replace a burned-out bulb with a new one? Here, in this case, with design, logistics, manufacturing, marketing of just that single bulb- there are many people involved. It could be argued that we all play some small part in the process. ------ Nothing to see here, end of the joke. :)

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What is worse than a paper cut? two paper cuts What is worse than two paper cuts The Holocaust What is worse than The Holocaust Three paper cuts

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What is this a book??!!! What am I supposed to do...... READ IT?????!!!!!!!!!

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What do you call a puppy with no eyes? Ugly,

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What did the Shark say when he had no lunch? We have a FISHue!

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What did Grandma give her grandson Billy for Christmas? Scarring memories of sexual abuse.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops