What's blue and can't have sex? A blueberry

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Why cant Michael Jackson take flying lessons? Because he overdosed on pain killers, and is now dead.

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What did the Shark say when he had no lunch? We have a FISHue!

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A white man and a black woman run for president The Black woman received 65% of all woman votes, 75% of all Hispanics and 99% of all black votes. The White man still won, and was a great president.

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The burgler walked into the house. Nobody noticed the initial intrusion. The burgler quickly left. The family of which was stolen from woke up the next day and enjoyed a hearty breakfast of grains, oats, and barley without a worry on anyone's mind.

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How does a blind bit of difference differ from one that can see?

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What do you call a person with no eyes? Blind.

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roses are flowers violets are too violets are purple not fuing blue

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a blond, brunette, and red head run away from cops and hide in potato sacks. the officer went up to the brunette and kicked the potato bag and the brunette went "woof" "woof". the officer went to the red head and kicked the potato bag and the red head went "meow" "meow". the officer goes to the blond and kicked the potato bag and the blond went "potato".

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What's the same between a plum and a rabbit? They are both purple, except for the rabbit.

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Why did the young boy say "Fuck"? He has Tourrete's

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Knock knock. Who's there? Becca. I just found out i have aids, so you should probably get yourself checked out.

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What did the black man, chinese man, and mexican man all have in common? They all happened to enjoy cantaloupe.

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What's black, white, and red all over? White on black homicide.

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Why can't Stevie Wonder drive? There is no steering wheel at the back of the bus.

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What did the burn victim get for Christmas? A book of matches

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What's worse than your mother dying in a car crash? Your father dying in the same crash.

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so he says "aaahhh". then i threw a fridge at him

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John:Why couldn't the T-Rex clay his hands? Billy:Because his arms are too small! John:no he's extinct dumbass

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Roses are red, Violets are pencil, this poem makes no sense, refrigerator

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Knock knock. Who's there? You're adopted.

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Why couldn't JImmy walk to school? A:Jimmy is in a wheelchair.

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A man was building a new kitchen for his wife. Just as he was installing the sink, his wife comes running into the kitchen and starts cursing. "What's the matter?" he asks. "Don't you like the new sink?" His wife replies, "I love it. But come quick, there's a spider in the living room!" The man walks over with a paper towel, grabs the spider, and throws it into the garbage. The wife looks at the husband, smiling, and says, "Thanks."

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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