Roses are red, Violets are blue, I'm a schizophrenic, And so am I.

What did Grandma give her grandson Billy for Christmas? Scarring memories of sexual abuse.

Q: How much does a hipster weigh? A: It varies largely by hipster, the same way it does with any other person.

A fish swims into a wall. Says dam.

Have you ever tried ethiopian food? No. Neither have they

Why did Billy get a 102% on his Algebra test? He got all of the questions correct including the bonus question. Oh, and he slept with the teacher.

What did the white guy say to the black guy wearing a black T-shirt? That's a very nice shirt.

Why did the chicken cross the street? It didn't. It got hit by a car.

What do you call 2 midgets and a pencil rolling down a hill? Satan

What's black, white, and red all over? A penguin getting crushed by a sledgehammer.

A man and a women have a conversation. Man: what's 2 + 2 Woman: four. Man: you're correct.

A person walked into a bar, he saw it was the wrong bar so he leaves...

Why din't the boy get a Christmas present? Because his dad go hit by a bus.

Roses are red. Violets are red. Everything is red. I soaked it in the blood of small children.

Friends are like trees. They fall down when you hit them with an ax.

How does Michael J. Fox like his Martini? With an Olive

How many nails does it take to build a house? As many as it takes to get the job done.

There once was a rose that was red Violets are blue Knock Know who's there? Man I gotta quit huffing glue

Your argument is invalid, but I will allow you your opinion nonetheless.

whats stupid and likes dumb jokes? you.

Twisty Snake bite: Doctors office. Patient: Err Doc, a snake bit me in the err, private area... Doctor: I must suck out the poison immediately! Patient: What? Man! Are you sick? How do I even know if the snake was poisonous? Besides they only do that crap in bad jokes! Doctor: Yeah but this is an anti joke so drop em! Later at home: Wife: So did the Doctor help you dear? Patient: Worst doctor ever, he really sucked!

why was 6 afraid of 7? because 7 8 9

John:Why couldn't the T-Rex clay his hands? Billy:Because his arms are too small! John:no he's extinct dumbass

why did the man paint his house? because he never wanted to paint his house

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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