Why did the penguin go to the cookie shop? He didn't, penguins don't eat cookies

Q: What's funnier than 24? A: 25.

Q: What's the similarity between puzzles and women? A: Prior to the 1920's neither had the right to vote.

Why do girls wear perfume? Because they smell and they're ugly

Whats the difference between peanut butter and jam? I can't peanut butter my dick into someones ass

What did the dog say to the human. "Woof."

Why did the gambling addict go into the casino? To use the bathroom

What do you call a man with no arms or legs after he got into a fight with his cat? You call him by his name and apologize for leaving catnip on his head.

So a seal walks into a bar... ...seals can't walk.

What's the best part of having a doctor for a best friend? The sex.

The grass is always greener on the give me a blowjob.

What do you call a Jew on a rollercoaster? A Jew on a rollercoaster.

A: Knock knock! A: Who's there? A: Forever A: Forever who? A: Forever Alone

Why did the basketball player shoot the ball? Because it was being mean to him

Why couldn't the moose find a good hotel for the night? A moose wouldn't have any currency available and quite frankly, no one would let him in.

How do you make a Mexican parade? Contact members of the Latin community and inform them of your wish to organize a parade celebrating their heritage.

women leaving the kitchen

what said the girl when the roof collapsed over her nothing she died

what does a nazi and the witch from hansel and gretal have in common, they both put people in ovens.

Wife: Do you know what the most untruthful lie I've told you? Husband: What? Wife: That I love you. By the way I'm leaving you for your father. The twins are gay and in love with each other and your daughter is a hooker with AIDS. Your mother killed herself upon hearing all this news. She suffered a lot. Oh, the dog died by rat poisoning that your dad put in the backyard. Bye.

What did the lion say to the octopus? Nothing, lions can't talk, and even if they did the chances of a lion and octopus meeting are very slim.

Whats better than the holocaust. Darfur

did u hear about evan porter going out with his computer of course not because u haven't read this joke yet

One time a man cut off Chuck Norris while driving, and Chuck Norris kindly excused the man's lack of consideration for his fellow drivers.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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