there's two nuns cycling down a cobbled street. one nun says:ooo iv'e never been this way before! the other nun says:i'm not surprised there's roadworks and a diversion!

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A: Knock knock! A: Who's there? A: Forever A: Forever who? A: Forever Alone

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How do you make a baby cry? Throw a brick at its face.

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What is the most effective abstinence plan? There is none.

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A man in a bar says "I'm drunk", immediately 10 men take of their clothes

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:-)book

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What did the dog say to the human. "Woof."

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Ask me if I'm in a tree? No.

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Who taught Chuck Norris? -Chuck Norris

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Today, we will be identifying power tools. This is not a drill.

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What did the lion say to the octopus? Nothing, lions can't talk, and even if they did the chances of a lion and octopus meeting are very slim.

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A mushroom walks into a crowded bar, the bartender says "we don't serve your kind here." Protestingly, the mushroom replies, "why not? I am a spore reproducing eukaryote!" Everyone stares as an awkward silence ensues.

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How do you put an elephant in a fridge? Open the door and put it in. How to you put a giraffe in a fridge? Open the door, take out the elephant and put in the giraffe. Simba hosts an animal convention and all the animals attend except which? The giraffe. There is an alligator infested lake. How do you cross? Swim across. All the alligator are at the convention.

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Whats better than the holocaust. Darfur

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What call a black man flying a plane? A pilot you racist.

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Hey guys wanna here a joke? Never mind it was a gay joke but f**k it.

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Cassie Mills you are gay stop being silly in class you're not funny.

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SC Johnson a Family Company

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What do you say when Obama gets shot? Some finaly had enough balls to shoot a black person. N.P.P.

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An Asian woman is driving home from work. She gets in an accident and is killed instantly. Her family is traumatized.

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What's even faster than the speed of light? The speed you close out of porn when you hear someone coming into the room.

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Why do people always walk so slow when your in a rush to get somewhere? They don't it just seems like that

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What do you call a horse, a cow, a pig, a sheep, a dog, a cat, and a mouse all walking in a straight line? Animals

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it lacks the cognitive reasoning ability necessary to determine that walking into oncoming traffic will surely result in death

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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