Why'd the first koala fall out of the tree? He died. Why'd the second koala fall out of the tree? He was stapled to the first koala. Why'd the third koala fall out of the tree? He thought it was a game. Why'd the refrigerator fall out of the tree? He thought he was a koala. Why'd the boy fall off the swing? He was hit by 3 koalas and a refrigerator. Why'd the boy fall off his bike? He had no arms or legs

thumb_up thumb_down +17

A patient walks into a clinic and says, "Doctor, Doctor! I feel like a pair of curtains!" The doctor replies, "I have no interest in whether or not you feel like purchasing items to spruce up your home."

thumb_up thumb_down +15

What did the black man say when he received cold fried chicken at a restaurant? He very politely asked for it to be warmed up, and exuded nothing but elegance and class.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

How do you make a plumber cry? Make his family cry!!!!!!!!!

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Poopsack Jones

thumb_up thumb_down +15

What did the poor guy get for christmas? The homeless guy.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

That maternal figure of yours is of such inadequate intelligence that she cannot fathom that, given a scatterplot with a linear correlation of greater than -1 and lesser than 1 and a reasonably consistent rise over run, a future value along the y-axis can be predicted if following the y=a(x)+b equation.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

What's room temperature and tastes like ice cream? Melted ice cream

thumb_up thumb_down +15

What is white on the top and black on the bottom? Society

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Women"s Rights

thumb_up thumb_down +15

why don't you make like a tree. and get out of here

thumb_up thumb_down +13

My friends are like trampolines I have none

thumb_up thumb_down +13

What's the difference between a duck and a goose? They are obviously different species but they both have wings and are birds and are actually pretty similar. Geese are usually bigger though I guess.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

What's funnier than Man on Woman domestic abuse? Nothing.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Q: What did the anorexic girl do for thanksgiving? A: Nothing, she was paralyzed from a fall 2 days prior and nobody had found her yet.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

yo mama is so fat she went to the doctor and the doctor told her she had diabetes

thumb_up thumb_down +13

How many Wal-Mart employees does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Just one, assuming he can reach it safely.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Why did Mary punch herself in the stomach? -she was pregnant

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Why did Chuck Norris go to Chuck E Cheeses? Because his friend wanted to go.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

A Jewish man overhears another man making a joke about the Holocaust. The Jew says, "Hey! You! My father died in the Holocaust!" The other man says, "Oh, I'm sorry. What camp was he in?" The Jew says, "Camp? No, my father had a heart attack."

thumb_up thumb_down +11

"Up to 50% off."

thumb_up thumb_down +9

What did the Catholic Priest do to the 9-year-old boy? He ate him. The priest was actually Jeffery Dahmer.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Robocop and T-800 where fighting, first the T-800 manages to injure Robocop critically, but Robocop manages to repair himself and break T-800`s legs off, which T-800 suddenly regrows due to an unexpected upgrade. After several hours of combat, where civilians are injured and half the town is destroyed they where both worn out, but ready for one last struggle... ...Eventually there was a great celebration for whoever won.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Knock knock Who's there? Prost Prost who Prostitute

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops