What do you give a small child when you don't have any candy? Nothing, you just kidnap them.

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What did Batman say to Robin befor they got in the car? Get in the car.

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A:what happens when you throw a black guy down from sky-scraper Q:he dies

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A black, asian, and white guy jump off a building, who lands first? Well, according to newton's law of gravitation every massive particle in the universe attracts every other massive particle with a force that is directly proportional to the product of their masses and inversely proportional to the square of the distance between them. It depends on who weighs the most

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Fuck yourself you piece of shit.

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Wolf Pussy

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What do you call a lady that cleans? A cleaning lady.

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How so you find out if a black woman is pregnant? Have her take a pregnancy test

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Knock knock? Who's there? The WNBA. LOL

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"Knock, Knock" "Who's there?" "Banana." "Banana who?" "Knock Knock" "Who's there?" "Banana." "Banana who?" "Knock, Knock" "Who's there?" "Banana." "Banana who?" "Knock, Knock" "Who's there?" "The police. We're looking for three escaped inmates posing as bananas."

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Have you seen Stevie Wonders new house? No. Well neither has he.

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. Two muffins are sitting next to each other in the dessert. A hungry man passes, takes a look at the muffins lifts his shoulders and walks away. The next day a camel walks by and eats one of the muffins. The camel dies instantly, apparently the muffin was poisoned.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? The holocaust.

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What did Jeff say to the guy who stole his car? Can I have my car back.

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What do you call a pickle with a cape? A pickle with a cape

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I used to think I was indecisive, but now I am not so sure.

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Life is like a box of chocolates. You eat them. get fat. Die.

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My aunt used to say slow and steady wins the race she died in a fire

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Why wasn't Justin Bieber allowed in the men's bathroom? It was closed for maintenance.

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There is this dylectic who can't spell.

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say iphone 5 times then look under your pillow ...nothings there

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What's black and white and red all over? The newspaper classified section after a man has abandoned long, futile job hunt. He has crossed out all the potential jobs with red ink. He was laid off due to the downturn in the economy and will now have to get food stamps, which is very embarrassing for a man who has worked to support his family his entire life.

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What do you call a blond harvesting penuts a penut farmer.

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Timmy stop making noises while mommy is working. I have to finish these TPS reports or else my boss will be very mad at me and we won't have Christmas again.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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