Looking for a job in this economy is like trying to find employment during an extreme economic downturn.

potato farming

How Do You Get Your Mom To Shut up? You Kill Her.

Star Wars

Two Jewish kids walked into a bar... mitzvot.

What's worse than being beaten by your Father? Well, it depends.

What's worse than a bee sting? Two bee stings. What's worse than two bee stings? The holocaust. Whats worse than the holocaust? Three bee stings.

A duckling is following its mother, but gets separated. Noticing that her child is lost the mother duck calls out, and the duckling finds her quickly.

What did the fox say to the blonde? "Hello". The girl then captured the fox and sold it to the government.

Why did the boy hate his bicycle and soccer ball he got for Christmas? The boy didn't have legs. He also hated sports. By the way he was black but that doesn't matter, he still hated sports. Who in the right mind would give a cripple inappropriate toys? Probably a racist Santa Claus. Oh by the way, Santa Claus is not real. So did they return the presents after the boy found out what it was? Yes, and it turns out the boy got a guitar and piano instead. Too bad the boy is also deaf.

If through some strange space-time paradox, Chuck Norris ever had to fight himself, Chuck Norris would-- What am I saying, that would never happen!

how did the turtle die? it drowned itself

I was on Skype with a girl yesterday and she asked "Do you want to see something?" "No," I said "my mom's in the room and she might get a bad interpretation." "I really want you to see this." She said. " No, my mom's still in the room, she'll think I'm weird if you turn out the lights." "Darn I really wanted to see your glow in the dark snuggie."

Who's the cutest girl in the world? Claire Seiter.

how do you upset a barber? Murder his family

A man walks into a bar... and recieves a concusion and short-term memory loss

What do you call a lettuce named Andrew? Andrew.

What did one cupcake say to the other cupcake? I want to eat you.

Not at all, I find your perception of things like that quite pleasing, you obviously care about me, and care about your wife, that's nice.

Two blondes walk into a bar. There is a fat man there, but nobody talks to him

An iguana walks out of a bar

Your Momma is so ugly, she got plastic surgery.

what do you do when a woman tells you no? cut her tongue out

Knock knock Who's there? Osama Bin Laden

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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