There are 4 people in a crashing plane, but there are only 3 parachutes. But, the teenage girl says she is depressed and cannot go on. The older woman breaks down into tears because she is reminded of her rough child hood. The two 21 year old twins start crying, too, because they were corrupted by their alcoholic father who would come home and abuse their family. As they were all crying, the two pilots and the flight attendant took the parachutes and jumped. The older woman realized she went to flight school when she was young so she took control. They were are happy and drank a little bit too much alcohol and got drunk. The pilot also drunk and crashed into a huge skyscraper. This catastrophe was later named 9/11.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Why did the cancerous elephant cross the road?

thumb_up thumb_down +7

A Jewish man overhears another man making a joke about the Holocaust. The Jew says, "Hey! You! My father died in the Holocaust!" The other man says, "Oh, I'm sorry. What camp was he in?" The Jew says, "Camp? No, my father had a heart attack."

thumb_up thumb_down +7

What did the little boy with cancer get for Christmas? Death

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Ah dead on it was all Taggart!!!

thumb_up thumb_down +7

A guy walks into a bar and asks the bartender for a soda. The bartender says, "We don't serve soda." The guy then says, "oh", and walks out.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

What do u call a black guy that sell drugs? A nigger

thumb_up thumb_down +7

"Knock Knock." "Who's there?" "Banana." "Banana who?" "Knock Knock." "Who's there?" "Banana." "I already asked ''Banana who?'' Is that your real name? Who is this really?" "Knock Knock." "You are upsetting me. I am calling the police now. Please get off my property."

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Why didn't the bear go snowboarding? It was hibernating

thumb_up thumb_down +5

What happened when the roof fell on a young boy? Nothing. He was an orphan.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Why didn't the chicken get to the other side of the road? Because chickens are in farms

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Dude? What. Dude? What! Wheres my car?

thumb_up thumb_down +5

What is blue and smells like red paint? Blue paint!

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Homework.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Where do cows go on the weekend? The slaughterhouse.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Whats funnier than a jew holding a nickel. Nothing. Jews are cheap.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Why did the lizard turn blue? He was low on oxygen.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

What is more tragic than a nice day wasted? Obesity.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Your mom is so fat, when she sweats, it is more than the normal amount of sweat.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Q. Why did the man fall off his bike? A. He was hit by a canoe.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

What did the fox say to the blonde? "Hello". The girl then captured the fox and sold it to the government.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

There was an old man from Limerick. He was of scottish ancestry and nearing his 76th birthday.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Her lips are not proportionally fit to her face.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Q: Why did the plane crash into a mountain? A: The pilot was a tomato.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops