What do Michelangelo and Kurt Cobain have in common? They were caucasian artists.

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead.

How do u tourcheer a fat kid? Make him chase a dounout

What do eagles and ground hogs have in common? They both live underground, except for the eagle.

A: Knock knock B: Who's there? A: A serial killer B: I don't feel comfortable opening the door

Why is the world flat? I don't know ask the Native American who was curious enough to take his canoe, go out into the middle of the water and never come back.

Why doesnt mexico have an olympic team? Because all the mesicans that can run, jump, and swim are already in the U.S.

A traveling salesman breaks down on a rainy night, but spies a farm house. he knocks on the door and the farmer answers. the salesman asks if he can spend the night. the farmer says "sure, but i gotta warn you, i don't have any daughters."

How do you make an idiot laugh? Tell him a mildly funny joke relating to bodily functions, such as defecating or passing gas.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, I can't rhyme Refrigerator

Why didn't the [any object] catch on fire? Because there was water on it. Why didn't the [other object] catch on fire? Because there was water on it. [repeat ad infinitum]

what did barrack obama say to the jew osama bin ladins a bitch

Why are all black people fast? They aren't. Some of them are slow.

A blonde tries to kill herself cutting both her wrists.Why didn't it work? Because her boyfriend found her just in time and managed to stop the bleeding and took her to the hospital. After some years of therapy they get married and live happy together for the rest of their lives.

Whats worse that stubbing your toe? Death.

If you don't live in the country, where do you live? The ocean.

Kid 1 "Man this is the hardest poop i've ever taken." Kid 2 "Maybe it's because you ate the Happy Meal toys." Kid 1 "You know what? I think you're right. Commotion ensues as the toilet bowl fills with blood as the action figure has cut the inside of his large intenstine. He is screaming in pain. Kid 2 reacts quickly getting him to the hospital just making it in time before Kid 1 passes out. Thankfully he survives but has to get shrgery. Meanwhile, the family dog Buster decides to drink the blood poop water from the bowl and dies from poisining.

Obama is a good president.

Q: What has one eye but cannot see? A: A blind cyclops

why did ben perve on the 5 year old girl he is a pedofile

What does the latin maid does when I tell har to clean behind the couch? Nothing, she doesn't speak English.

Your mom was so stupid that she went back to school and now she is graduated with a degree.

How did the baby cross the road? The baby got stapled to a chicken

Womens rights.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...