What's black on top and white on bottom? Rape.

Looking for a job in this economy is like trying to find employment during an extreme economic downturn.

BARRACK OBAMA.............WHAT A JOKE!!!!!

What do you call two gay men playfully wrestling? Immature.

"I love you, you love me" And you didn't just read that; you sang it.

Two Jewish kids walked into a bar... mitzvot.

Star Wars

potato farming

How Do You Get Your Mom To Shut up? You Kill Her.

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A man walks into a bar. The bartender says "why the long face?" He says, "I have acromegaly"

"Why is Barney green and purple?" "Because the producers of the show decided to make him that way."

Why should you rape a dog instead of a human. Because there esier to catch

What did the fox say to the blonde? "Hello". The girl then captured the fox and sold it to the government.

A duckling is following its mother, but gets separated. Noticing that her child is lost the mother duck calls out, and the duckling finds her quickly.

If through some strange space-time paradox, Chuck Norris ever had to fight himself, Chuck Norris would-- What am I saying, that would never happen!

how did the turtle die? it drowned itself

Why did the boy hate his bicycle and soccer ball he got for Christmas? The boy didn't have legs. He also hated sports. By the way he was black but that doesn't matter, he still hated sports. Who in the right mind would give a cripple inappropriate toys? Probably a racist Santa Claus. Oh by the way, Santa Claus is not real. So did they return the presents after the boy found out what it was? Yes, and it turns out the boy got a guitar and piano instead. Too bad the boy is also deaf.

What's worse than being beaten by your Father? Well, it depends.

What's worse than a bee sting? Two bee stings. What's worse than two bee stings? The holocaust. Whats worse than the holocaust? Three bee stings.

If I could rearrange the alphabet, I'd probably put all the labials, coronals and dorsals in separate places sorted into plosives, nasals and fricatives, with the vowels at the beginning sorted by their relative IPA chartings, to make it more logical and easily attainable to foreigners.

how do you upset a barber? Murder his family

Who's the cutest girl in the world? Claire Seiter.

I was on Skype with a girl yesterday and she asked "Do you want to see something?" "No," I said "my mom's in the room and she might get a bad interpretation." "I really want you to see this." She said. " No, my mom's still in the room, she'll think I'm weird if you turn out the lights." "Darn I really wanted to see your glow in the dark snuggie."

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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