Q: What do AIDS and rape have in common? A: If you play guard for the Lakers, neither will affect you.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Kah-________-

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Bill is at a bar with a couple of his college buddies. He notices another one of his friends, Jim, who has his back faced to him, and calls him. The man turns and it is not Jim. Bill apologizes and they carry on with their lives.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

What did the woman buy her husband? Nothing, she's a widow.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Did you know?

thumb_up thumb_down +6

What do you call a horse and a donkey mixed together? A mule.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

What happened to Jim. He died his funeral is tomorrow.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Q: What is the difference between a black man and a Park bench? A: A park bench is an inanimate object.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Why is the world round? The early earth was molten, and a liquid in a vacuum subject only to its own gravitational forces will assume the shape of a sphere. Gases will behave in the same manner. The effects of the sun and other planets, plus the rotational effect have caused the earth to assume a round shape.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

A man walks into a bar. The bartender says "why the long face?" He says, "I have acromegaly"

thumb_up thumb_down +4

The funniest tragedy in his young life...wasn't funny.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

What did the apple say to the orange? Nothing. Fruits can't talk.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

I once ate at a restaurant where the food was so bad that the chef's name was Earl.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

An old lady and her son walk into a hospital, only to find it covered in TRICERITOPS SHIT!!!!

thumb_up thumb_down +4

4023145287

thumb_up thumb_down +4

If I could rearrange the alphabet, I'd probably put all the labials, coronals and dorsals in separate places sorted into plosives, nasals and fricatives, with the vowels at the beginning sorted by their relative IPA chartings, to make it more logical and easily attainable to foreigners.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

what's worse then droping your phone. 9/11 having sex with the holocaust

thumb_up thumb_down +2

One jew, three Canadians and a Dutch man walk into the bar. The jew buys a beer for the Dutch guy, then the Dutch guy responds with.. "Thank you."

thumb_up thumb_down +2

how did the turtle die? it drowned itself

thumb_up thumb_down +2

You won't put that in your ass.... No shit.

thumb_up thumb_down

Why didn't the boy finish his homework? He was in a coma.

thumb_up thumb_down

Oh no! I forgot the milk!

thumb_up thumb_down

Whats funnier than 24? 25

thumb_up thumb_down

A man farted. Another man walked away.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops