Roses are Red Violets are Blue you have hemroids

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Will my son live, doctor? No because you don't have a son and I am not a doctor

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Did you know Helen Keller had a swingset in her backyard Neither did she.

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A man eats a piece of fried chicken A chicken that was days before retirement and had a pregnant wife and two children to look after

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What do u call a black guy that sell drugs? A nigger

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Why did the cancerous elephant cross the road?

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A Jewish man overhears another man making a joke about the Holocaust. The Jew says, "Hey! You! My father died in the Holocaust!" The other man says, "Oh, I'm sorry. What camp was he in?" The Jew says, "Camp? No, my father had a heart attack."

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Why does smokey bears wife never have kids? Because every time she gets hot smokey beats he with a shovel

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What's the difference between black people and dog shit? One of them eventually turns white and stops smelling.

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A fire at a chinese high school caused the death of many children. The drill was unsucessful.

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There are 4 people in a crashing plane, but there are only 3 parachutes. But, the teenage girl says she is depressed and cannot go on. The older woman breaks down into tears because she is reminded of her rough child hood. The two 21 year old twins start crying, too, because they were corrupted by their alcoholic father who would come home and abuse their family. As they were all crying, the two pilots and the flight attendant took the parachutes and jumped. The older woman realized she went to flight school when she was young so she took control. They were are happy and drank a little bit too much alcohol and got drunk. The pilot also drunk and crashed into a huge skyscraper. This catastrophe was later named 9/11.

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stuff and dogs {()}

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Dude? What. Dude? What! Wheres my car?

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Why didn't the bear go snowboarding? It was hibernating

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What happened when the roof fell on a young boy? Nothing. He was an orphan.

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Why couldn't the little boy find his friend in hide and go seek He was blind

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dog

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Whats funnier than a jew holding a nickel. Nothing. Jews are cheap.

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Where do cows go on the weekend? The slaughterhouse.

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Homework.

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What's better than a gold medal in the special olympics? ICE CREAM!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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I was on Skype with a girl yesterday and she asked "Do you want to see something?" "No," I said "my mom's in the room and she might get a bad interpretation." "I really want you to see this." She said. " No, my mom's still in the room, she'll think I'm weird if you turn out the lights." "Darn I really wanted to see your glow in the dark snuggie."

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What is blue and smells like red paint? Blue paint!

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Why did the lizard turn blue? He was low on oxygen.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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