You wanna know something that's totally out of this world? The moon

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How did the blond die? Substance abuse

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Why was the boy upset? Because he has a frog stapled to his face.

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Ask me if I'm in a tree? No.

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why couldnt sally help timmy pick up his ice cream? she had no arms

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I cant think of one (._. )

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If you added up all of the grains of sand in all the beaches of the world, how many would there be? Anyone?

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it lacks the cognitive reasoning ability necessary to determine that walking into oncoming traffic will surely result in death

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How do you put an elephant in a fridge? Open the door and put it in. How to you put a giraffe in a fridge? Open the door, take out the elephant and put in the giraffe. Simba hosts an animal convention and all the animals attend except which? The giraffe. There is an alligator infested lake. How do you cross? Swim across. All the alligator are at the convention.

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Waiter! What's this fly doing in my soup? He's not doing anything, sir. He's dead.

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Shoot for the moon. Even if you miss, you'll probably just land back on earth.

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One time a man cut off Chuck Norris while driving, and Chuck Norris kindly excused the man's lack of consideration for his fellow drivers.

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Why did a guy with schizophrenia does it take to walks into a bar.

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What do you call a blue duck that speaks? A dream.

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What did the black kid get for christmas? Nothing, he doesn't celebrate christmas

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Obama enters a KKK meeting Obama: Oh sorry I thought this was the Kentucky Fried Chicken... the font was so small so... as he starts backing off scared... KKK: leader, of course Mr.President, feel free to come again anytime! Moral: Kings Knocking Ketchup is actually a nice place if you not unlike me enjoy ketchup...

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Do you want to hear a joke? Well, I do too.

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What do you call a guy who set's pancakes on fire? Mentally confused, and in need of a psychiatrist.

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Why was the little girl lying on the floor. Because she got shot.

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why are niggers afraid of the dark ? because they think that darkness is the only black thing there

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If olive oil is made of olives, calculate the mass of the sun.

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Okay chan, you can have it then, I am tired.

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If a wheel falls off a bus whilst travelling down a river, how long does it take to shingle a doghouse? None, because there are no bones in cottage cheese.

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Knock, Knock Knock, Knock Knock, Knock No One's home.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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