Why couldn't Roger become an astronaut? Because Roger's a toaster.

While on a business trip, a Jim got a call on his cell phone. It was his best friend. He was informing Jim of his wife's death in a terrible train crash. She didn't die on impact, but her legs were cut off by metal debris from the train car in front of her. She fought against the pain and used a shirt she found from a dead body to stop the bleeding. She managed to drag herself to the nearest road crossing, where someone drove her to the hospital. Despite her efforts to survive and the surgeons efforts to save her, she died that night as a result of excessive blood loss. After he hung up, Jim turned up the ringer volume on his phone because he couldn't hear it very well when it rang.

What happened to the latino and asian man in math class when they had a test? They both recieved exceptional scores as they both helped each other study the night before.

A really hot girl walks past 2 guys and the following conversation is produced... Guy1:damn! look at that ass! Guy2:yep I bet shit comes from that thing! When's the last time she had diarrhea?!

-Knock Knock. -Come in.

A Mexican walked away from a construction site.

What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? -Hey! Where's my tractor?

Do you know karate, shorty? Or are those bruises from an abusive father?

skjer;nf;oashfaefaohesf oiqeshLACLAHN IS SUTRP SD] make it shorett and swert

Why don`t women need watches? Because in our modern society, there are many clocks in most locations.

Roses are #FF0000 Violets are #0000FF

What's the fastest animal on earth? An Ethiopian chicken.

Justin Beiber does not have a really good voice.

So there's A blonde, a brunette and a redhead at a lake. they all swim across and have a picnic at the other end.

25

Q: Why did the cookie go to the doctor? A: Because he had terminal brain cancer.

Q: What did the hobo get for his birthday? A: Older.

Looks through the peephole.

what happened to the polish man that was running late for work he got their late apparantly

What did the bus driver say to the black man? I like your shoes.

Penis!

Q:What did the cat say to the dog? A: Meow

scenario: 12 men in bikinis throwing snowballs at each other in Africa. Question: Who ate all the world's giant pears? Answer: It was an allergy to noses!!

When does a blond laugh and cry? When she's raped by a clown.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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