What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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Q: Why did the cookie go to the doctor? A: Because he had terminal brain cancer.

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How do you kill a retard? Slit his throat.

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Whats worse than 1 dead baby in a bag? Ten dead babies in one bag.

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Hi, my name is Mark and I have dead babies in my garage... Just kidding. My name is not Mark.

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Q: What did the hobo get for his birthday? A: Older.

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What did the bus driver say to the black man? I like your shoes.

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An English couple walk int a Portuguese bar. They never see their daughter again.

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How do u shit With ur ass

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Knock Knock. Who's there? Dwayne. Ok... come in.

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What is white, wet, sticky, and gets squished out? Glue obviously, wait.... What were you thinking of?

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how do you kill jesus? with a knife

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What's worse than a giant paint bubble? TWO GIANT PAINT BUBBLES!

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What's black and white and red all over? A black, white, and red painting.

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What did the pornstar say to the priest? i DO porn

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A man walks into a bar and says, "Ow."

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What smells like marjuana and is black? A black man smoking weed

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Why did elmo jump of the cliff caus he was depresed

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SC Johnson a Family Company

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A: Knock knock! A: Who's there? A: Forever A: Forever who? A: Forever Alone

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Why did the elephant fall out of the tree? Because it was dead. Why did the second elephant fall out of the tree? Because it was attached to the first elephant. Why did the third elephant fall out of the tree? Peer pressure.

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women leaving the kitchen

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A blind man walks into a bar. He orders a drink and after a couple hours he leaves. He's only color blind.

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Ask me if I'm in a tree? No.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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