Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because i was keeping his family at gun-point on the other side.

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Whats funny about ISIS? Nothing, you asshole, its terrifying.

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timmy: a duck walks up to a lemon stand and says to the man running the stand hey... Paul: what r u talking about its duck it can't talk

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Knock knock Who's there? Alzhiemers guy Alzhiemers guy who? Knock knock

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Why did a lady get in a car crash? Because woman don't drive, they stay in the kitchen!

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Knock Knock Who is it? Me, I forgot my keys on the way out oh ok...

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A man walks into a bar and says, "Ow."

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whats worse than bitting into a apple a finding a worm? bitting into ur apple an finding out u have just killed noddy who was hiding in ur apple

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1234 5

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what's worse than one scoop of ice crea falling on the floor? - the holocaust what's worse than two scoops of ice cream falling on the floor? - nothing

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There was a man who bought a cat. He fed it well. It got so fat.

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roses are red, violets are blue, i have a gun, shut the **** up.

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why did the rooster cross the road? because it was stapled to the chicken

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Why can't penguins fly? ......It is against their evolutionary state.

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what's white on top and black on the bottom? Society

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What goes gurgle, gurgle, gurgle, POP! A baby in a microwave.

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Whats long and hard on a black man..... 2nd grade

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Do you know what's funnier than 24? 25

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What do you call a Jew on a rollercoaster? A Jew on a rollercoaster.

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What is white on the top and black on the bottom? Society

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D is for diabetes, Cookie Monster, if you keep this up.

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Why did the Jew pick a dollar off the ground? He dropped it.

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How do you put an elephant in a fridge? Open the door and put it in. How to you put a giraffe in a fridge? Open the door, take out the elephant and put in the giraffe. Simba hosts an animal convention and all the animals attend except which? The giraffe. There is an alligator infested lake. How do you cross? Swim across. All the alligator are at the convention.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops