Why couldn't the 10 year old see the Pirate Movie? Because he was dead...

thumb_up thumb_down +27

A man walks into a psychiatrists office with a banana in his ear, The psychiatrist says, why do you have that banana in your ear. The man says, "What?" The psychiatrist says, "I said, 'Why do you have that banana in your ear?" The man says, "What?" The psychiatrist shouts, "I SAID, WHY DO YOU HAVE THAT BANANA IN YOUR EAR?" The man says, "Sorry, I can't hear you, I'm deaf." (props- Marty Smith)

thumb_up thumb_down +27

Robin, get in the Batmobile.

thumb_up thumb_down +27

Billy isn't a homosexual, he just has sex with men. Billy has sex with men, because Billy's in prison.

thumb_up thumb_down +27

Q: What kills millions of people each year and sneaks up behind you unexpectedly? A: HIV/AIDS

thumb_up thumb_down +27

How do you kill a retard? Slit his throat.

thumb_up thumb_down +27

knock knock use the doorbell. our door has a hive of bees in it. three ambulances and a pest control squad was at the house five minutes later.

thumb_up thumb_down +27

How many feminists does it take to change a light bulb? Trick question! Feminists can't change anything.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

Knock knock. Who's there? *gun shot*

thumb_up thumb_down +25

How many blondes does is take to screw a man? one and a condem

thumb_up thumb_down +25

Q: What did the hobo get for his birthday? A: Older.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

This is my rifle, this is my gun, one is for shooting, the other is decorative.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

What does a squirrel get when it rains? It gets wet.

thumb_up thumb_down +23

Roses are bacon Violets are red I have a gun I'm not very original.

thumb_up thumb_down +23

what did the ruler say to the other ruler your a ruler

thumb_up thumb_down +23

What do you call a Mexican and a Black man on the moon? Astronauts.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

whats worse than fining 7 dead babies in 1 trash can? finding 1 dead baby in 7 trashcans!

thumb_up thumb_down +21

Wanna Hear A Joke ? Afgan

thumb_up thumb_down +21

A Priest, a Rabbi, and an Orca Whale walk into a local eatery to discuss what is on their mind. The Priest says he is proud that even though their community is comprised of people residing in many different religions, they still work together to strive for a better tomorrow. The Rabbi nods his head in agreement,he states that he is proud of all the hard working men in their community that are willing to make sacrifices for the needy. The Orca Whale also nods in agreement and pauses for a moment to think while he insight-fully gleams at his two other friends. The Mighty Orca Whale then contributes to the conversation by saying eeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuurrrr!

thumb_up thumb_down +21

why did the boys voice get so deep? He just went through puberty

thumb_up thumb_down +21

Why did the gambling addict go into the casino? To use the bathroom

thumb_up thumb_down +21

Roses are green Violets are yellow Those are the wrong colors oh well who gives a shit.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

Whats the worst part about being fat? Your fat.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

How many Jews does it take to screw in a light bulb? One jew to screw in the light bulb.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops