So i walk in my house after drinking that night.... my wall is green

Why did the chicken cross the road? I dunno, that's why I asked you.

What did the homeless man get for Christmas? Nothing.

What is worse

roses are black, violets are black, im sleeping

what is black and looks like a mushroom? a black mushroom

A woman goes to the doctor.....She has terminal cancer.

Once upon a time.

Why was the chimp late for his flight? Because chimps arent allowed through airport security.

How do you insult a Canadian? You just swear at them and hope for the best.

Roses are red, Violets are blue I'm Schizophrenic and so am I

What is Osama Bin Laden's favorite food? I don't know, and to be completely honest I doubt you do either.

Why was 9 afraid of 1? Because when dialed together, an emergency call was most likely coming and 9 is very sensitive to those types of moments

It says so on your cap.

why did the chicken cross the road? To prove to the possum it can be done.

There are two muffins sitting in an oven the first muffin turns to the other and says "Its pretty hot in here." the second muffin jumps back and yells "HOLY SHIT A TALKING MUFFIN!!!"

Knock knock knock knock knock knock knock knock knock, Who's there? Woodpecker. Woodpecker who? Woodpecker.

What is the difference between Batman and a black man? Their skin color and bank accounts.

Ben Colbert is gay

Why was the man arrested? He had brutally stabbed 398 people in a 10 hour period.

How do you know when someone tells a bad joke? You don't find it humorous.

Why is that blond girl so dumb? Because she has fetal alcohol syndrome.

Why did the girl go over her texting limit? She had a hot boyfriend.

What is the difference between a jew and a pizza? One if part of the four main food groups, and one is not.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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