Why can't Amy Winehouse drive? She is dead.

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Why doesn't Michael Jackson sleep with boys anymore? -Because he is dead.

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Robocop and T-800 where fighting, first the T-800 manages to injure Robocop critically, but Robocop manages to repair himself and break T-800`s legs off, which T-800 suddenly regrows due to an unexpected upgrade. After several hours of combat, where civilians are injured and half the town is destroyed they where both worn out, but ready for one last struggle... ...Eventually there was a great celebration for whoever won.

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How do you get a guitar player to play softer? Ask them politely to turn down their volume.

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A guy walks into a bar. The bartneder says, "Wow, buddy, you look awful. What's wrong?" The guy responds, "My life is a joke."

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your mom is so poor that she is unable to pay for your child care leaving you to have a terrible childhood, troubled adolescence, and eventually lie passed out in an alley after OD'ing off of heroin.

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Okay chan, you can have it then, I am tired.

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If youve ever seen the wizard of oz movie and family guy, then u get what i mean. Hes a PHONY! a BIG FAT PHONY!

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Why did the girl fall off the swing? Someone threw a fridge at her...

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How did shaniqua fall of the hill? because the diabito truck ran her over

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A white man bumps into an Asian man while walking down the street. They have a brief chat. As they part ways, the white man says, "Facebook me!" The Asian man replies, "Due to my socio-economic situation I cannot currently afford an Internet service." So they exchange telephone numbers.

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Why didn't the bear go snowboarding? It was hibernating

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What do you call a fly with no wings? A fly.

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Why is the world round? The early earth was molten, and a liquid in a vacuum subject only to its own gravitational forces will assume the shape of a sphere. Gases will behave in the same manner. The effects of the sun and other planets, plus the rotational effect have caused the earth to assume a round shape.

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What walks like a duck, talks like a duck, but doesn't look like a duck? A horse named Quackie

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What's black on top and white on bottom? Rape.

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Your mama so fat she often lays awake at night wondering if your father is happy with their sex life. He isn't.

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Why didn't the chicken get to the other side of the road? Because chickens are in farms

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What's orange and doesn't bounce? A flat basketball

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wHY DID WILLIAM CHEUNG LICK THE BERILLIAM FUNG, BECause it was fun!

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What do you call two gay men playfully wrestling? Immature.

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BARRACK OBAMA.............WHAT A JOKE!!!!!

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A fire at a chinese high school caused the death of many children. The drill was unsucessful.

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Looking for a job in this economy is like trying to find employment during an extreme economic downturn.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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