See you ******* dogface! All right? You're a compulsive *********** sit on that swivel! Stop swearing!

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What do you call a fat ethiopian. Impossible

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Roses are red Violets are red Trees are red Shrubs are red HOLY SHIT! MY YARD IS ON FIRE!

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Q:Whats worse then finding a worm in your apple A:You have AIDS

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Your mama so fat, that it's starting to affect her relationship with her husband in a negative or harmful way. (CSC)

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You wanna hear a clean joke? I took a bath with bubbles. Wanna hear a dirty joke? I slipped in mud. Wanna hear an even dirtier joke? Bubbles is a guy..

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Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she's a woman.

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How do you torture Helen Keller? Leave the plunger in her toilet with the handle greased.

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How do you kill a dinosaur? You don't. It's already dead.

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Shit happens. Correction: feces happens.

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Q:Why did the man get hit by the car? A:He was standing on the road.. ;DDD

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What do you call a man with three arms and three legs and no nose. A highly unlikely instance that no one would believe is real.

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You know what isn't funny? AIDS. You know what is? Brittany Spears with AIDS...

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whats stupid and likes dumb jokes? you.

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1, 2, buckle my shoe. 3, 4, shut the door. 5, 6, I'm gonna to cut you in your sleep.

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Why can't dinosaurs talk? Because they're dead.

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Bob Bob Bob Bob Bob Bob Bob Bob What What the hell are you doing here

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what is funnier then a man with AIDS? -nearly anything as AIDS is a serious medical condition and could be potentially lethal

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Why couldn't Roger become an astronaut? Because Roger's a toaster.

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While on a business trip, a Jim got a call on his cell phone. It was his best friend. He was informing Jim of his wife's death in a terrible train crash. She didn't die on impact, but her legs were cut off by metal debris from the train car in front of her. She fought against the pain and used a shirt she found from a dead body to stop the bleeding. She managed to drag herself to the nearest road crossing, where someone drove her to the hospital. Despite her efforts to survive and the surgeons efforts to save her, she died that night as a result of excessive blood loss. After he hung up, Jim turned up the ringer volume on his phone because he couldn't hear it very well when it rang.

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What do you call a bird with wings? Redundant.

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What did the racist wife give to her black husband on their anniversary? Golf clubs because he liked to golf.

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A man walks into a bar. He asks the bartender for a glass of milk. The bartender says, "Sorry we don't serve milk here.

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What's the difference between a white person and a black person? The presence of melanin in their skin, as well as often their socioeconomic and cultural backgrounds.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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