A guy walks into a bar and asks the bartender for a soda. The bartender says, "We don't serve soda." The guy then says, "oh", and walks out.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Guy 1: Are you alright? Guy 2: No, i'm half left!

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Teacher:What is the outer layer of a tree? Dog:Bark. Teacher: What is the square root of 69? Dog:8.30662386

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Why did the cancerous elephant cross the road?

thumb_up thumb_down +8

how do make a condom fly around the room? Piss it off!

thumb_up thumb_down +8

What did the little boy with cancer get for Christmas? Death

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Whats funny? Nick Sotelo

thumb_up thumb_down +6

A baby seal walks into a club...

thumb_up thumb_down +6

What's the difference between black people and dog shit? One of them eventually turns white and stops smelling.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Roses are red, Violets are blue, Here comes a car, It ran over m--

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Where did Lucy go after being hit by a train? Well, the results of this question are somewhat difficult to pinpoint, but here is a generalized ratio model. 47% of Lucy went underneath the trains wheels and was left behind, crushed into the railway sleepers. 33% was thrown aside and discarded around the SIDES of the track. 19% was carried on the front of the train, into the next station where it fell off as soon as the train stopped. 1% was found in Mount Everest.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Q. What is green and has wheels? A. Grass, I was joking about the wheels.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Homework.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

-Hey, Larry! How much is one plus one? -Two

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Knock, knock. Come in!

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Why'd the chicken cross the road? Dead Babies

thumb_up thumb_down +4

"Why is Barney green and purple?" "Because the producers of the show decided to make him that way."

thumb_up thumb_down +4

What did batman say to the Joker? I'm Batman

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Will gropes Ebola victims

thumb_up thumb_down +2

S.O.P.A

thumb_up thumb_down +2

What's wrong with four black people in a cadillac driving off a cliff? The Cadillac holds 5

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Q: Has your ear operation had success? A: Hotdog with chili.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

AHHHHHHH OMGOMG OMG I SAY TO MY MUM SHE RUNS INTO THE ROOM SCREEMING AND SAYS WHAT HAPPEND I SAY ....................... i forgot now (k.c)

thumb_up thumb_down +2

One jew, three Canadians and a Dutch man walk into the bar. The jew buys a beer for the Dutch guy, then the Dutch guy responds with.. "Thank you."

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops