What's big and purple? Something that's big and purple

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Why did the car suddenly stop? It was at a redlight.

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A horse walks into a bar. Bartender says, "Why the long face?" The horse does not respond because it is a horse. It can neither speak nor understand English. It is confused by it surroundings, and gallops out of the bar, knocking over a few tables.

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Why did the child with terminal cancer and leprosy get sent to the principal's office? Because his parents and brother died in a car accident, and the principal though he should be informed.

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Why did the man steal 2 watermelons? He was a shoplifter and had a background of crime

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What do you call a black man that is working on a farm? A farmer.

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knock knock whos there? how should I know?

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What did mr. Mackey say to his class. It's easy mkay

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How does a blind bit of difference differ from one that can see?

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Q: why did the black man cry when he went to bed? A: he had just had a visit from the police and apparently his family had been tragically killed in a car accident.

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say iphone 5 times then look under your pillow ...nothings there

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Knock knock. Who's there? Becca. I just found out i have aids, so you should probably get yourself checked out.

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Roses are brown, violets are brown, who keeps shitting in my garden?

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This is'nt a joke but like if it pisses you off when people comment on there own joke pretending to be someone else.

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What did santa claus say when he saw a girl standing on the corner? Ho Ho Ho... ;)

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You wanna hear a clean joke? I took a bath with bubbles. Wanna hear a dirty joke? I slipped in mud. Wanna hear an even dirtier joke? Bubbles is a guy..

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What do you call 10,000 lawers jumping out of a plane? A good start.

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How do you fit 100 babies into a bucket? With a blender. How do you get them out again? With Doritos.

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what is funnier then a man with AIDS? -nearly anything as AIDS is a serious medical condition and could be potentially lethal

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So there is 10 Nazis and a monkey the rest doesn't matter but i farted...

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how did the horse fall into the river? he sliped

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Why was Steve buried in Australia? Because he was dead.

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Knock Knock. Who's there? UPS.

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While on a business trip, a Jim got a call on his cell phone. It was his best friend. He was informing Jim of his wife's death in a terrible train crash. She didn't die on impact, but her legs were cut off by metal debris from the train car in front of her. She fought against the pain and used a shirt she found from a dead body to stop the bleeding. She managed to drag herself to the nearest road crossing, where someone drove her to the hospital. Despite her efforts to survive and the surgeons efforts to save her, she died that night as a result of excessive blood loss. After he hung up, Jim turned up the ringer volume on his phone because he couldn't hear it very well when it rang.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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