Wanna hear a joke? A joke.

Guy 1: What is long, hard and full of semen? Guy 2: A submarine. Guy 1: No, my penis.

How many dead babies fit into a bathtub? 23

Womens' rights.

Why can't we see the wind? Because no one likes you...

Terrorist walked into the bar, all dead, except for a small child. The police came and asked the boy: "Boy, how I survived the blast?" The boy answered: "I'm not a boy, I am broccoli"

What's worse than eating cows. Death

Beauty is only skin deep Well of course it is, muscles, bones and tissues look disgusting.

Why did the man fall down the steps? I shot him in the face.

How do you kill a blue elephant, with a blue elephant gun, how do you kill a pink elephant, you strangle it until it turns blue and shoot it with a blue elephant gun.

Why did the chicken cross the road? The chicken probably crossed the road because of some sort of impulse or external stimuli (most likely a bug or a worm located on the other side of the road) in which he or she responded to by proceeding to cross the road in order to get to the other side as chickens have a sense of cause to effect in which the effect would be consuming the bug or other living life form.

There once was a beautiful princess named Snow White who lived with seven dwarves in the forest. One day, and old hag approached her and offered her an apple. She bit into the apple, chewed, and said,"Wow, that's tasty. Is this a Golden Delicious?" The hag said, "Why yes, it is. I have a private orchard. Perhaps I'll let you see it some time." The two promptly resumed their lives.

What's yellow and highly dangerous? Shark-infested banana pudding.

Q: What was the little boy doing in the deep end of the swimming pool? A: Drowning.

The Holocaust

Knock knock. Whos there? To get to the other side.

here's a great way to ruin someone's 'knock knock' joke: Knock knock Come in!

Two fish were in a tank one said...."ill drive!"

I won the game.

What's funnier than Man on Woman domestic abuse? Nothing.

a little girl gets raped

A man and a women have a conversation. Man: what's 2 + 2 Woman: four. Man: you're correct.

Nathan Gooderson.

knock knock zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz knock knock zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz knock kock ding dong ding di-ding dong zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz sigh weeeeeeeeeewooooooooooooooooo zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz hey yo wake up zzz-oh-huh-what-whos there i've been yelling for like five minutes oh sorry jim will you let me in already all right

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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