Why cant Hellen Keller Drive? Because shes a women.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding two worms in your apple.

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What did the robot do when a person was shot? Nothing, it wasn't programmed for that situation.

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What do you call a man with no brain? dead.

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Roses are red Violets are red Trees are red Shrubs are red HOLY SHIT! MY YARD IS ON FIRE!

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Why did Rose throw the clock out the window? Because she's a moron.

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what's funnier than 3 dead babies in a trashcan pretty much anything thats not funny

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Jacob Edwards has friends.

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Why did the rabbit like to wear shoes? It doesn't.

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What sits in a corner and travels all the way around the world? A stoner on hallucinogens.

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How many Republicans does it take to screw in a lightbulb? I would think one would be sufficient, though political affiliation shouldn't have anything to do with the situation. Unless the lightbulb was residing in a specified meeting place for members of the Republican party. Also, if the building was a more public institution for gatherings, which could imply larger ceilings, then two might be needed, just for safety precautions.

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What did the teacher tell the failing student? You will most likely be kicked out of our school and have no further education and be subjected to a low-level career.

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Incey-wincey Spider climbed up the water spout. Down came the rain and washed the spider out. Out came the sun and dried up all the rain. But sadly, the spider had drowned. [L]

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Roses are red, violets are red, daffodils are yellow, and pansies are pink.

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Your argument is invalid, but I will allow you your opinion nonetheless.

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what is fat and ugly. fat and ugly people

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Once upon a time there was a little puppy. He then grew old and died.

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What did the man say after falling off the bridge? Nothing. He died a painful and terrible death on impact.

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Why don't they sell pharmaceuticals in the rain forest? Because it is to sparsely populated and not economically viable.

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What did the polar bear say to the penguin? Nothing. They don't live on the same continent.

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3 men walked into a bar... They sat down and had a beer.

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What is white, long, and thin? A tablecloth

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A catholic priest held a puppet show at a kindergarten. The children were a very polite audience and the event was considered a great success.

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Q: What's worse than 10 dead babies in a tree? A: I'm sure there are lots of things.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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