You wanna know something that's totally out of this world? The moon

how do you kill jesus? with a knife

your mom is so stupid she did not do so well on her IQ test

why couldnt sally help timmy pick up his ice cream? she had no arms

Howmuch wood could a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood? Anyone? I'm trying to settle a bet.

What do you call a blue duck that speaks? A dream.

What do you call a bicycle that likes threesomes. A tricycle

Why didn't the 13 year old Black boy have any friends? He was autistic and didn't connect properly with people.

whats worse than finding a worm in your apple, finding a apple in your worm.

Q: What did the anorexic girl do for thanksgiving? A: Nothing, she was paralyzed from a fall 2 days prior and nobody had found her yet.

Steve Jobs.

Why was Ray Charles always smiling? because he was a happy guy

Why did the girl fall off the fridge? She tripped on a rock.

Why did the lemming jump off a cliff? Because he was suicidal.

What did the man tell his parents after having sex with another man? A. I am gay.

Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: 9/11

I pissed myself the other day in Harrods when I saw a Somalian boy run up to a curtain saying mummy.

A man eats a piece of fried chicken A chicken that was days before retirement and had a pregnant wife and two children to look after

what did the monkey say to the breast cancer?

I like my women like I like my coffee... Without a penis.

What's worse than an empty bottle of Yoohoo? Literally nothing.

Knock knock Who's there? No-one who??? *Silence*

What did the priest get for Christmas? Herpes

Roses are red violets are blue I have a pie would you like some?

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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