guy walks into a bar a metal bar ouch

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You know what happens when you assume? You base a conclusion on insufficient information.

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Milk, milk, lemonade, around the corner fudge is made. This market has a very dynamic and fresh selection.

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Do you know how I know that you're gay? You told me you are gay.

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What is big, red, and eats rocks? Big Red that eats rocks. -For Abel

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Commercials lie: I think that they do believe it's not butter!

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What do you give a small child when you don't have any candy? Nothing, you just kidnap them.

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A prostitute has sex with a man. She gave him herpes.

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Ever heard about the gray pipes that ran along the walls? Those pipes transmit gas. Gas killed the jews. You sick fucker.

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If a dyslexic man walks into a bar, check your notes. You told the joke wrong.

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A dog walks into a bar and falls on his butt beacause dogs cant walk.

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What did the banana say to the bear? Nothing, banana's can't talk.

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Q-How do you kill an elephant? A- An elephant gun Q- How do you kill a blue elephant? A- A blue elephant gun Q- How do you kill a red elephant? A- Strangle it until it turns blue then use a blue elephant gune Q- How do you kill a purple elephant? A- Don't be ridiculous purple elephants don't exist

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What couldn't Little Timmy see the pirate movie? Because Little Timmy was blind.

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Question : Why did the boy need to change his pants? Answer: During recess, the little boy was running to fast and fell on the ground. Then kid he has been bullying pissed on his leg.

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Knock Knock Who's there? It's the mailman delivering your weekly delivery

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What do you call a black man driving a police car? Officer

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Whats Asian and longer than 2 inches? chopsticks.

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What did Grandma give her grandson Billy for Christmas? Scarring memories of sexual abuse.

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GAY PEOPLE

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Why did Helen Kellers dog run away? You would too if your name was Hjshdvcyehbretafvvba.

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Q: How much does a hipster weigh? A: It varies largely by hipster, the same way it does with any other person.

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why couldnt the gay man marry??? cause he was dead.

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what do you call an overweight 80 year old white man trying to be a pimp ? Mr.Fredrickson

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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