What do a bunch of dead babies look like in a blender? I don't know I was too busy masturbating.

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This one time, at band camp we played in a band

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Q: who is the worst person to ever post "jokes" on anti-joke.com? A: ryan valee

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What starts with a 'D' and ends with 'ick' Daniel and Jimmy are walking in the park when suddenly they get hit by a stick because a mysterious person threw the stick.

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Why did the elephant cross the road? Because it was stapled to the chicken

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What did the farmer say when he lost his pig? Wheres my Pig?

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KNOCK-KNOCK Who's there? There's a man after me, I was just walking down the street and he started chasing me! I'm scared, I don't know what he'll do. Let me in goddamnit! There's a man after me I was just walking down the street and he started chasing me I'm scared I don't know what he'll do let me in goddamnit who?

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Two muffins are sitting next to each other in the dessert. A hungry and lost man passes by and considered eating one of the muffins. Unfortunately he can't make a decision in time and took of in his 4-wheel drive. The next day a camel walks by and eats one of the muffins. The camel dies instantly, apparently the muffin the camel ate was poisoned. The now not so hungry and lost man looks at the dead camel and noticed the zoo is almost closing now. So he left in a hurry, to cook for his family.

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Knock, knock. Who's there? Not the World Trade Center.

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What is good about the holocaust? It is over

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I asked the librarian for a book on suicide. She said "I'm sorry we don't have those in stock." So I just hung myself.

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A blonde, the pope, and a young kid are in a crashing airplane and there's only one parachute. But by the time any of them equips it, the plane hits the ground and they all die.

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How do you keep a blonde occupied for hours? Put on an entertaining movie.

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What is an anti-joke? This is.

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Why was the hamster not on his wheel? Because he had a stroke.

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Why did the man throw the clock out the window? The man's loving family had recently been murdered, and the clock was a constant reminder of their mortality, as it had served as the center of those horrific events.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? I dunno, that's why I asked you.

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Obama is a black man living in a white house. TEEHEE

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what the orphan boy get for christmas? Not his parents

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roses are black, violets are black, im sleeping

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Your computer will self - destruct in 5 seconds

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JESSSSIICCCCCAAAAAA!

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what do we want a cure for turrets! when do we want it C U NT !!!

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I don't always finish my sentences but when I do...

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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