What did mr. Mackey say to his class. It's easy mkay

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What do you call a blonde with half a brain? A person with light, yellowish hair who has a tragic genetic deformity.

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dumbledore says,"today we will learn new spells,any questions?" a student says,"are you serious?" dumbledore says,"no he is in jail for a crime he didn't commit,sort of like the a-team."

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What's worse than crying over spilt milk? The Holocaust.

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Why can't an elephant smoke cigarettes? They do not posses the fine motor skills.

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Whats worse than getting negative 5 on your calculus test? Coming up positive on your Chlamydia test.

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The doctor comes out of the room and tells the new parents that there is good news and bad news. The couple says they want to hear the bad news first. The doctor says "your baby is black." The couple then ask "what is the good news?", the doctor replies "your baby is dead."

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What did the Muslim do after his friend told him a funny joke ? Laugh.

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What's meaner than taking a candy from a baby? Tossing the baby of a cliff

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Women's sports.

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A man and a women have a conversation. Man: what's 2 + 2 Woman: four. Man: you're correct.

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Kid: Teacher, what do you hate more than supervising people in detention sessions at this school? Teacher: I am a vegan. Hence meat is relatively dispicable and I abhor it in general.

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Knock knock! Who's there? This. This who? This joke.

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A man walks into a bar. The bartender asks what he'd like to drink. The man pulls out his gun, shoots the surprised bartender, and proceeds to execute all the patrons of the bar and finally commit suicide. A post-mortem identification of the man identifies him as a victim of childhood sexual abuse and a diagnosed schizophrenic. There is a nice funeral for all the victims and the media respectfully minimizes exposure of the event.

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How do you fit 100 babies into a bowl? You use a blender. How do you get them out? Tostitos scoops.

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What do you call 10,000 lawers jumping out of a plane? A good start.

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You hear about that old man that died on the news? It was my grandfather... oh...

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What does a person say before they die? Whatever their last word is

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here's a great way to ruin someone's 'knock knock' joke: Knock knock Come in!

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Why did the little boy cry? His entire family was shot and killed at his elementary school play.

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What is brown and sticky?

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How do you find a needle in a haystack? You don't, you're too distracted by the pile of adorable kittens next to it

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What do you call a box with a dead Jew in? A coffin.

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What do you call a black man on the moon? An astronaut.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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