What's worse than 20 babies stapled to one tree? Getting life imprisonment after...

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Q: Why did the cookie go to the doctor? A: Because he had terminal brain cancer.

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A baby seal walks into a club.

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your mom is so old she was put in an old age home

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Whats big red and eats rocks? A big red rock eater

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What did the anti-joke say? Nothing for it is an anti-joke which is a group of word formed to create a sentence and sentences cannot speak.

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So two Jews walk into a bar... Its nice that they take missionary work to new heights

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Knock Knock. Whose there? Not your dead mom.

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Roses are red violets are blue this poem make no sense microwave.

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A black and a mexican start a resturaunt it turns out to be a big success and they make a chain and profit from it.

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a show horse jumps over a bar

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if japanese cars are called riceburners would german cars be called jewburners

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Abstract thinking part one of... One: What kind of idiot tries to run trough a wall, rather than to just use the door? The "Idiot" is in a cell whose walls are made of thin wood plates, the door is made of steel and locked. How I cured my own damn anxiety five hundred of one: Now this is real see? I got stressed, damn it was like something that was not me but my body scared as shit began fearing for its life right my arms shaking like fuck sweat and all that crapa? So I got pissed got in front of the mirror, stared at myself and shouted "GODDAMN BODY YOU THINKS YOU CAN CONTROL ME? IF YOU DO NOT STOP BEING SO FUCKING AFRAID OF DEATH! THEN I WILL KILL YOU MYSELF!" So yeah unconventional indeed, but it worked for five times, and I never had to use it anymore. Moral: My own body and every fucking cell of it, is not the only one that fears me more than death.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Due the limited cognitive ability and a lack of critical thinking skills, the chicken mistakenly ventured across the road in search of grain. Luckily the chicken was not injured on this occasion, however other chickens may not be so lucky in the future.

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A man. That is all.

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I scream. You scream. We all scream.

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Why did Doris want to father children? Because she wanted to have a fry-up with the leftover baby oil

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What do you call a black guy that flies a plane? A pilot.

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How do you confuse a blonde? You tell em a AntiJoke!

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Roses are red, Violets are blue.

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What is the same about a girrafe, and an ant? They are both REALLY tall. Except for the ant, sorry I lied.

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Q: Why did the horse put on cologne? A: He wanted to smell nice.

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Why did the blonde fall off of the swing? Because someone threw a machete and it made contact with her skull, thus causing a painful break and rapid blood loss, making it virtually impossible to remain sitting upright.

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Why did the man walk into a bar? I don't know? Ask him. by Burflared

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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