Tim's gay.

what's white on top and black on the bottom? Society

Three blondes walk into a community college.

Abstract thinking part one of... One: What kind of idiot tries to run trough a wall, rather than to just use the door? The "Idiot" is in a cell whose walls are made of thin wood plates, the door is made of steel and locked. How I cured my own damn anxiety five hundred of one: Now this is real see? I got stressed, damn it was like something that was not me but my body scared as shit began fearing for its life right my arms shaking like fuck sweat and all that crapa? So I got pissed got in front of the mirror, stared at myself and shouted "GODDAMN BODY YOU THINKS YOU CAN CONTROL ME? IF YOU DO NOT STOP BEING SO FUCKING AFRAID OF DEATH! THEN I WILL KILL YOU MYSELF!" So yeah unconventional indeed, but it worked for five times, and I never had to use it anymore. Moral: My own body and every fucking cell of it, is not the only one that fears me more than death.

Shoot for the moon. Even if you miss, you'll probably just land back on earth.

Why did the chicken cross the road? To warn people on the other side that the sky was falling

what did the monkey say to the breast cancer?

Q: What did the anorexic girl do for thanksgiving? A: Nothing, she was paralyzed from a fall 2 days prior and nobody had found her yet.

A dyslexic man walks into a bra. He removes the piece of lingerie from his face and continues shopping for clothes.

whats worse than finding a worm in your apple, finding a apple in your worm.

You are the weakest link. Goodbye.

So one day a man walks into a bar. The bartender asks him what he would like to drink. He said he would like a glass of water. The bartender said "why come all the way to a bar just to get some water." The man responded "well its a longer walk to the coffee shop."

What is the best way to put out a fire? Stop, drop and have an orgy.

why did the monkey fall out of the tree? because it was dead. why did the frog fall out of the tree? because it was stapled to the monkey,

Hi! This is Richard Young, I'll take it from here Ms.Mcgruder, lets find a quiet place to talk about this, e.c. at 5:00 p.m. tomarrow.

Hitler was Jewish.

There is a black man and a Mexican standing near the edge of a cliff, the black man turns to the Mexican and says, "We probably shouldn't stand this close to the edge of a cliff" The Mexican agrees and they step away from the cliff.

A man walked into a bar and said, oppa gangnam style That man is now dead

Q:whats the diffrence between a mexican and a deer A:one is a mexican and the other one is a deer

Why didn't the skeleton cross the road? He didn't have the necessary mental ability or muscle structure to complete said task.

Knock Knock! Who's There? Not Steve Jobs.

What's the difference between and onion and a dead baby? There is a big difference.

Q:Why did the man rob the bank? A:He needed money.... duhhh -Ryan Vallee

why did the chicken cross the road? its a chicken so it will wonder when not properly fenced in

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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