"Knock Knock" "Who's there?" "Jeff" "Jeff who?" "Jeff Johnson" "From the office?" "No I work at the dehli" "The one on 6th avenue?" "No, the one on Park." "What do you want?" "Could you open the door?" "No, I don't know you" "Isn't this Mr. Walter's house?" "No, my name is Roger Stevens" "I'm sorry I must be at the wrong house" "What address are you looking for?" "15322 N Gary street" "This is 15323 N Gary" "Oh I'm sorry" "Try knocking across the street" "Thank you"

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Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding two worms in your apple.

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josh roberts you speccy cuunt

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, You're allergic to flowers So this poem will kill you

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Why didn't the 34 year old woman fit into some size 14 jeans? Because she was size 16.

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What is black and hangs from a tree in my backyard? My neighbors children.

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There are stars in the sky when it's dark. You may have noticed I used a contraction in the previous sentence.

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How did the lifegaurd break his leg? He was hit by a submarine!

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You wanna know something that's totally out of this world? The moon

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What's black, white, and red all over? A white man's bleeding cancerous tumor.

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why couldnt sally help timmy pick up his ice cream? she had no arms

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Steve Jobs.

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What do you call a fridge? Dorothy.

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A mushroom walks into a crowded bar, the bartender says "we don't serve your kind here." Protestingly, the mushroom replies, "why not? I am a spore reproducing eukaryote!" Everyone stares as an awkward silence ensues.

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A blind man accidentally walks into another man whilst walking along a sidewalk. The man yells at the blind man, "Watch where you're going!" He then apologizes for his rude behaviour, not noticing right away he was in fact, blind. To show how truthfully sorry he was he took him out for beers the following evening. Soon after they became close friends and now share an apartment in Denver, Colorado.

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Three blondes walk into a community college.

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What do you call a blue duck that speaks? A dream.

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Why did the blonde fall off of the swing? Because someone threw a machete and it made contact with her skull, thus causing a painful break and rapid blood loss, making it virtually impossible to remain sitting upright.

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Q: Why did the horse put on cologne? A: He wanted to smell nice.

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What's even faster than the speed of light? The speed you close out of porn when you hear someone coming into the room.

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There is a black man and a Mexican standing near the edge of a cliff, the black man turns to the Mexican and says, "We probably shouldn't stand this close to the edge of a cliff" The Mexican agrees and they step away from the cliff.

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why did the girl fall of the swing because she was pushed of by obama

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What's worse than biting into your apple and finding a worm in it? Biting into you apple and finding two worms in it.

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A man walked into the bar and ordered a drink, drank it then stood up and left remembering that he once had a drinking problem and had overcome it.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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