Commercials lie: I think that they do believe it's not butter!

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Why did the girl go over her texting limit? She had a hot boyfriend.

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What did my mom get for christmas? My dad, D1ck in a box. My dad's name is Richard.

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What did the banana say to the bear? Nothing, banana's can't talk.

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A Jew, a Muslim, and a homosexual jump from a cliff to see who gets to the bottom first. Who wins? Society.

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A man walks into a bar. Jeremy Lin congratulates him for being a person.

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How did Little Jimmie leave school? In a body bag.

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Q: Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? A: Because he was dead.

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GLaDOS: So... this cat loves lasagna so much that he eats all of the lasagna in his house. Okay, apparently it's not the cat's house or his lasagna. Oh good! The man who owns the lasagna is furious! GLaDOS: The end. GLaDOS: The end? GLaDOS: That's not funny. GLaDOS: Do either of you feel like laughing? GLaDOS: Alright, I'm pulling you out. GLaDOS: Welcome back. While you were dead, I reworked the cartoon. It's up on the screen. GLaDOS: As you can see, in my version the man points out to the cat that the house is equipped with deadly neurotoxin dispensers. GLaDOS: At which point the cat reflects on the time he ate all of the man's lasagna and feels remorse. GLaDOS: Briefly. GLaDOS: Reactions? GLaDOS: Yes, it's funny because most of it actually happened.

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Whats Asian and longer than 2 inches? chopsticks.

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Why did the child with terminal cancer and leprosy get sent to the principal's office? Because his parents and brother died in a car accident, and the principal though he should be informed.

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what's your favorite soccer team? liverpool

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Q: Why did the monkey climb a tree? A: To avoid predators.

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dumbledore says,"today we will learn new spells,any questions?" a student says,"are you serious?" dumbledore says,"no he is in jail for a crime he didn't commit,sort of like the a-team."

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How does a black man make an anti joke? www.anti-joke.com/submit

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What is a bear's favorite televison show? It doesnt have one because it is a bear which makes watching television an illogical fallacy.

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What's the difference between a Jew and Hitler? Well, I asked you so I don't know why you said "what?".

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The doctor comes out of the room and tells the new parents that there is good news and bad news. The couple says they want to hear the bad news first. The doctor says "your baby is black." The couple then ask "what is the good news?", the doctor replies "your baby is dead."

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side... But he got hit by a car instead, Life is full of disappointments

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So I was talking dirty to this deaf chick right...She didn't hear me.

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i hate you.

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Knock knock! Who's there? This. This who? This joke.

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Why did the boy cross the road Because he needed to get to the bus stop

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like my drawing of a white person?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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