Why did phil krahn go to the store? To get one of those suits

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Why did the Jew pick a dollar off the ground? He dropped it.

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What did the rape victim say to the rapist? "mmfff...mmm.....mmmmm"

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Q: What's funnier than 24? A: 25.

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There was a man who bought a cat. He fed it well. It got so fat.

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How do you make a blond cry? Rape her

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Whats white, and edible? white chocolate

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Roses are red Violets are blue I own a lawn mower Can you swim?

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What do you call two homosexuals in fancy hats? It depends, you have to ask their names first.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Dumb jokes, now shut up.

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Hey guys wanna here a joke? Never mind it was a gay joke but f**k it.

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Abstract thinking part one of... One: What kind of idiot tries to run trough a wall, rather than to just use the door? The "Idiot" is in a cell whose walls are made of thin wood plates, the door is made of steel and locked. How I cured my own damn anxiety five hundred of one: Now this is real see? I got stressed, damn it was like something that was not me but my body scared as shit began fearing for its life right my arms shaking like fuck sweat and all that crapa? So I got pissed got in front of the mirror, stared at myself and shouted "GODDAMN BODY YOU THINKS YOU CAN CONTROL ME? IF YOU DO NOT STOP BEING SO FUCKING AFRAID OF DEATH! THEN I WILL KILL YOU MYSELF!" So yeah unconventional indeed, but it worked for five times, and I never had to use it anymore. Moral: My own body and every fucking cell of it, is not the only one that fears me more than death.

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A woman is home washing her dishes when she suddenly slips banging her head on a cabinet. She passed out for a few seconds, then woke to find a great gash on her left cheek, fairly spurting blood. At the emergency room, the doctor asks, "How did this happen?" The woman replied, "My boy friend tried to drown me."

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Q. On a scale of 1-100, how immature are you? A. 69.

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Goon Bear+Homo= Corey Jacobs True Story

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What do you call a horse, a cow, a pig, a sheep, a dog, a cat, and a mouse all walking in a straight line? Animals

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Wanna hear a joke? Women's rights.

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What do you call a gay African American Jewish German flight attendant who is addicted to many hard drugs? His name.

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What did the penis say to the vagina? Nothing, genitalia can't speak.

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Knock, knock. Who's there? New Kids on the Block. Wait, who?

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what do rappers cover? ->CANDY CREDITS: ANUJ NARAYAN VARMA from Leland high school

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wHY DID WILLIAM CHEUNG LICK THE BERILLIAM FUNG, BECause it was fun!

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Roses are penis Violets are penis I like penis Penis

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Q:what do you call a black guy with a gun A:racial equality in our nations armed forces

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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