- Anti Joke

What's funny about suicide? Nothing, that's horrible.

here's a great way to ruin someone's 'knock knock' joke: Knock knock Come in!

A man is driving home from work. he realizes he left his suitcase back at the office. he turns around and drives back to the office. he walks in the office and grabs his suitcase, and as he's walking out he's stopped by his boss. his boss simply asks "what are you doing in the office at this time, Eric?" the man replies to his boss " sorry sir i was just grabbing my suitcase as i forgot to bring it as i was leaving work" his boss lets him pass " okay Eric, have a good night" the man get back in his car and drives home. but on his way home a pedestrian runs in front of the road. the man runs him over unintentionly. the man is jailed with manslaughter for 4 and a half years

The mouse and the elephant went to take a bath. They had a nice time.

Roses are red Violets are blue who are you kidding, violets are violet

How do you find a needle in a haystack? You don't, you're too distracted by the pile of adorable kittens next to it

A horse walks into a bar...n

how did the horse fall into the river? he sliped

2 blonds are driving on the road on their way to Disney Land. They come to the sign that says Disney Land left so they started crying, turned around and went home.

Why did the kid get athsma? Genetics.

Why did the little girl fall down She was shot in the leg

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side.

If John has 32 candy bars and he eats 28, whAt does he have? Diabetes. John has diabetes.

What do you call an indian who is underwater? A scuba diver.

what is fat and ugly. fat and ugly people

Have you seen Stevie Wonders new house. No. Neither has he

Why did the baby cross the road. It was stapled to the chicken.

why did dinosaurs die??? because a giant rock blew them up

Chuck Norris died.

Knock Knock There's no door here, I'm right in front of you.

why did the chicken cross the road Why not

Why was the asian guy's eyes slanted? Your question is a very valid one that most people often wonder, but never really ask. It's called an epicanthal fold...please, NOT "slanted eyes". Many people consider this to be a derogatory description of the descendents or those of Eastern Asia (as do I, being half Korean), but most people are unaware of this and say it anyway. I'll assume you didn't know this. :) The epicanthal fold (what we have) is something that all babies are born with, but those who may not be of Eastern Asian origin will eventually lose. The purpose of this "fold" is to protect the eyes from extreme sunlight and cold weather. Most people of the this part of Asia originated in Mongolia where the weather conditions were very cold and harsh. Also, with most of this population, you'll notice that there exists some extra padding below the eyes as well. With all that white snow and the sunlight reflecting off of it, don't you think with time our bodies would develop some sort of defense for one of our most valued senses--our sight? It makes sense, doesn't it? Also, notice, that the farther south you travel in Eastern Asia the "rounder" the eye gets (their is less evidence of the epicanthal fold), since the climate gets warmer the farther south you go. Evolution, baby. So, Eastern Asian eyes are NOT really slanted. They just appear to be. Instead they just have that extra fold above the eyes that make them appear "thinner", if you will. If you want to sound halfway intelligent, please don't use the description "slanted eyes" anymore, since this will only make you seem like somewhat of a bigot (racist). (You might say it around the wrong person one day.) Sorry, but I'm just trying to give you some good advice. I hope I helped.

Two men sit down at a bar. First man: I hear you're having a baby! Second man: My wife had a miscarriage. First man: Oh.... The talking ceased

why couldn't the blonde change the light bulb? because he chose the wrong sized screwdriver from his tool box

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK! Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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