A man walks into a bar. Later that night he comes home to an intervention and realizes he has a drinking has hurt him and his family.

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Stephen Walking.

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Why did the Jew pick up the loose change on the ground?Because he has to use it for taxi money to get back home.

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Why did the asian die? he was driving

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What did the man with paranoid schizophrenia say? I suffer from paranoid schizophrenia.

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What did the man say to Hitler? You're a douche

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What did the parrot say to the cow? Moo

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Q: what animal didnt get on Noah's ark in pairs? A: worms. they got on in apples.

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What do you call a cow climbing a tree? Amazing. How many cows have you seen climbing trees?

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What do you call an illegal citizen from the Middle East? Someone seeking a better life in a democratic country after suffering in a communist government for his entire life.

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what do you call a duck with no legs? a sitting duck

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hey what are you eating there? a giant scorpion that tried to rape me.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead. Why did the other monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was stapled to the first. Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? Because he thought it was a game.

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do you want my comeback? its in your mums mouth

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Why can't the blonde dial 911? Because she's being held hostage against her will.

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A black and a mexican start a resturaunt it turns out to be a big success and they make a chain and profit from it.

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What do you call a dead black guy? A TERRIBLE CRIME

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How much wood would a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood? As much as it is capable of. Personally depends on the weight of the wood.

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Why is the apple mushy? Because a car ran over it.

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Knock knock. Who's there? Nobody. Nobody who?

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a man got hit by a truck in brooklyn, JK he got shot, he was in brooklyn, Duh, he stumbled out in to traffic afterwards

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Knock knock who is there ? i'm an orphaned, sir can you tell me why did you write who "is" instead of who's ?? because than i will have to use the (') key and its very far not to mention that i have to use the shift key do u want a pizza ? how much ? 50 cents ? get the hell out ? im not even in yet !

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Dave: Say "game" ten times fast Bud: Game, game, game, game, gay ma, gay ma, I'm gay, I'm gay, I'm gay

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A guy walks into the bathroom, sits down and poops.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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