What did Tom get for Christmas? Gloves, but Tom had no arms. Knock knock? Who's there? NOT TOM

Where did John go after the explosion? Everywhere.

What is this, a center for ants? No, this is a model of the building proportionally smaller than the one we will be building.

This one time, at band camp we played in a band

How do you stop a train? Throw a fridge at it.

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was dead.

what do you call a shoe with legs? roadrunners.

What's more annoying than Minion quotes? That the girl in the basement keeps screaming for help.

Knock knock. Hello dear. Come in.

you just lost the game!

What's better than Justin Bieber's new hit single, "Baby"? Everything

a man sees a monkey playing the drums at first he thought it waz the guy in the monkey suit that plays the drums but on closer inspection he sees that it is in fact a real monkey on that note he tries to befriend the monkey but the monkey soon tore the man into pieces

what is black and looks like a mushroom? a black mushroom

What did the patient say when the doctor told him he had aids? "Oh my god. Are you sure?"

Q:What's the difference between a duck? A: The higher it flies, the much.

Why did Obama win the president election He had a greater amount of votes that Jonh mccain

Asians are ugly and they look they have down syndrome.

Why do Squirrels accidentally plant millions of trees. Because they they bury their nuts and forget where they are.

A blind guy sees a nuclear bomb.... he dies.

Why can't Ray Charles drive? Because he's blind? No, because he's dead

im dylan, i wank over teabaging people on cod

What do you call a teacher that gets wasted? A wasted teacher.

Why do firemen wear red suspenders? To hold their pants up.

What`s that CREAM that comes out of you when your mom puts a WHIP on you with a switch? WHIPCREAM!

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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