Commercials lie: I think that they do believe it's not butter!

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Why didn't the boy eat peanut butter? He had Arachibutyrophobia.

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Why did the mushroom go to the party? He was feeling upset because his wife left him and took full custody of his three kids. His friend cheered him up and took him to the party. At the party, he did a line of cocaine and became a drug addict. He died six months later.

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What did the banana say to the bear? Nothing, banana's can't talk.

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"Hello." "Hi."

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i felt like burning some calories so i lit a fat kid on fire

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Two ducks are sitting in the bathtub. One asks, "Hey, can you please pass the soap?" The other responds, "Sure, if you pass the typewriter."

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I learned a new party trick over the weekend; I swallow a piece of string and it comes out my other end tied! I shit you knot.

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what's funnier than hell? heaven

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what do you call a fish without eyes? a fshhhhh

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Whats Asian and longer than 2 inches? chopsticks.

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what's your favorite soccer team? liverpool

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GAY PEOPLE

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Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she was born with the disorders of being blind and deaf. For any human, having blindness and deafness makes driving a near impossible task.

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Q: How much does a hipster weigh? A: It varies largely by hipster, the same way it does with any other person.

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Kittens.

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What happened to the orphan on Christmas? he got raped

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What do you call a black guy in space? An astronaut

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Why did Susie fall off the swing? She had no arms ... Knock knock Who's there? Not Susie

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What is the difference between a jew and a boyscout? a boyscout comes back from camp.

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What's worse than a dead baby in a trash can? The grief the family feels at the loss of their newborn child.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Loss of habitat.

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i like my women like i like my coffee...big boobs

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What did the cat say when it jumped into the cardboard box? Meow

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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