I cut my pubes, Now they itch a lot.

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If you're a man, why don't you want to drop the soap in prison? The shower floors are disgusting and carry bacteria. No way would any person -- man or woman -- want to touch it.

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Q.What is the bigest lie in the universe? A. I have read and agree the the Terms of Service.

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What's worse than a woman driver? Getting a cactus shoved up your ass.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Dumb jokes, now shut up.

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Why didn't the skeleton cross the road? He didn't have the necessary mental ability or muscle structure to complete said task.

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Why did Susie fall off of the swing? She was hit by an asteroid.

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Knock Knock! Who's There? Not Steve Jobs.

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Communism

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Hey Caleb.

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Yo mama is so fat that you are constantly ridiculed by the local kids and constantly hope that the obesity isn't hereditary.

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How can you tell you're in a childrens' ambulance from the inside? From the clown patterned body bags.

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onranges are orange bananas are yellow and apples are red/green ................... and im ................. PINK (lw/kc)

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women's rights.

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What did the frog say to the beautiful sleeping princess? Ribbit

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cut it out ..but i dont have a scissor

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A black guy walks into a bar with a beatiful parrot on his shoulder. "Wow," says the bartender. "That is really something. Where'd you get it?" The parrot was his fathers. Do to severe mental and physical illness, he can no longer take care of it. He asked his son to take it, those were his last words as he slipped into a coma

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A man asked another man what he was doing the next day. The man then proceeded to tell him that he had not intended on having any plans due to the fact that he was planning on killing himself within the next twenty three hours.

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Two hunters are out in the woods when one of them collapses. He doesn't seem to be breathing and his eyes are glazed. The other guy whips out his phone and calls the emergency services. He gasps, "My friend is dead! What can I do?". The operator says "Calm down. I can help. First, let's make sure he's dead." There is a silence, then the man said "he has a pulse". The operator then calmly stated "we are sending a helicopter to air lift him out of there as we speak". The man got helicoptered to the nearest ER, and the doctors did their best to save him. He ended up having to go on life support for three years until his family members finally decided to pull the plug. The medical insurance didn't cover life support and the family went broke because of it.

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A seal walks into a club.

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??????????????(?)/// ????????(^0^)/

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What's black and white, and red all over? newspaper...

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why was the girl in the corner with a knife? she's an emo

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You want to know what is worse than having a teen parent? Being a teen parent.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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