What is the same about a girrafe, and an ant? They are both REALLY tall. Except for the ant, sorry I lied.

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Communism

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What do you call a chicken with its head cut off? A dead chicken. Most likely ready to be cooked/eaten

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What do you call a black person trying to swim? Wet.

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Whats pink and fluffy? Pink Fluff

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Why didn't the skeleton cross the road? He didn't have the necessary mental ability or muscle structure to complete said task.

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onranges are orange bananas are yellow and apples are red/green ................... and im ................. PINK (lw/kc)

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Knock knock Who's there? Prost Prost who Prostitute

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What did the frog say to the beautiful sleeping princess? Ribbit

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Hey, I just met you And this is crazy, but you're getting too close And I'm about to file a restraining order, so back up, maybe?

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How did shaniqua fall of the hill? because the diabito truck ran her over

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How is it possible for a man to get raped? Easy. He lied.

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Whats worse then finding a worm in your apple? Finding a bomb in your apple.

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So a man was walking down the street with bananas in his ears when he saw one of his friends coming the other way. When they met up the one friend asked, "Hey you know you've got bananas in your ears?" To which the man replied "What? I can't hear you, I have bananas in my ears."

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Two hunters are out in the woods when one of them collapses. He doesn't seem to be breathing and his eyes are glazed. The other guy whips out his phone and calls the emergency services. He gasps, "My friend is dead! What can I do?". The operator says "Calm down. I can help. First, let's make sure he's dead." There is a silence, then the man said "he has a pulse". The operator then calmly stated "we are sending a helicopter to air lift him out of there as we speak". The man got helicoptered to the nearest ER, and the doctors did their best to save him. He ended up having to go on life support for three years until his family members finally decided to pull the plug. The medical insurance didn't cover life support and the family went broke because of it.

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I told my friend a joke. He didn't laugh, I asked why. He said he was autistic and he does not understand humor.

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R2-D2 is quite possibly the most vulgar character on the set of Star Wars. Every word he says is bleeped out.

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Knock, Knock. Who's there? Doctor. Doctor Who, Your Doctor, you have 5 months to live

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What is worse than 10 dead babies in a trash can? 1 dead baby in 10 trash cans

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How do you kill a blonde? lightsabre to the throat should do it

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What happens when you push an asian in a hole? He falls in

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Icecream

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because he died...

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A scottish and a mexican were walking on the streets when the mexican got hit by a car. The scottish man called the ambulance and walkked away.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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