How do you find a needle in a haystack? You don't, you're too distracted by the pile of adorable kittens next to it

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How do you get a baby to stop crying You kill it

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How did the fat man die? Clogged arteries leading to a heart attack.

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3 men walk into a bar. The fourth one ducks.

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A man walked into a bar. He did this because he was blind and could not see the obstacle in his path.

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What did the Engineer say to the English major? Hey we went to the same school and got different degrees! Cool!

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Roses are brown. Violets are brown. It's the middle of winter. Flowers look like poop.

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Going for the Dislike record woot I farted!

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What did one deer say to the other? Nothing. The second deer was killed while they were eating and now the first deer is scarred dot life.

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And then the devil said "Let there be Justin beiber"

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how do you keep a blond in sespence you dont tell her

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The President, a terrorist, a student, and a genius were on a crashing plane. They all died.

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There was a man who had a camel, but one day he lost his camel. He wanted to go and look for it but he couldnt because he had to go to work. So the next morning he went to look for his camel. He went over the road and saw a gate, but he couldnt through because he had to go to work. The next morning he went over the road, through the gate and saw a forest, but he couldnt through because he had to go to work. The next morning he went over the road, through the gate, through the forest and saw a hill,but he couldnt go down the hill because he had to go to work. The next morning he went over the road, through the gate, through the forest,over the hill and saw a river,but he couldnt go over the river because he had to go to work. The next morning he went over the road, through the gate, through the forest,over the hill, over the river and saw a house, but he couldnt go to the house because he had to go to work. The next morning he went over the road, through the gate, through the forest,over the hill, over the river, to the house and saw a door, but he couldnt knock on the door because he had to go to work. The next morning he went over the road, through the gate, through the forest,over the hill, over the river, to the house, knocked on the door, and saw a man, but he couldnt speak to the man because he had to go to work. The next morning he went over the road, through the gate, through the forest,over the hill, over the river, to the house, knocked on the door, saw a man, and asked the man, "have you seen my camel?", but the man couldnt respond because he had to go to work The next morning he went over the road, through the gate, through the forest,over the hill, over the river, to the house, knocked on the door, saw a man, and asked the man, "have you seen my camel?", and the man said, "no"

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what time is it rape time

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Why did the baby cross the road. It was stapled to the chicken.

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Ask me if I'm a horse. Are you a horse? Nay.

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why did the 1st koala fall out of the tree ? it was dead why did the 2nd koala fall out of the tree ? it was hit by the first koala why did the 3rd koala fall out of the tree ? it thought it was a game why did the 4th koala fall out of the tree ? it was hit by a fridge why did the 5th koala fall out of the tree ? it was inside the fridge

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Your mom is so dumb, she has difficulty acquiring a job to support her family.

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Wanna here somethin funny? Nope.avi

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Stevie wonder walks across the road without looking both ways.

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why couldn't the blonde change the light bulb? because he chose the wrong sized screwdriver from his tool box

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What do you call a group of black gentle men running down a hill A group of black gentle men running down a hill

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What has four legs, its yellow with black spots, and can run as fast as a Cheetah? Another Cheetah

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I like my coffee like I like my women Without a penis

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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