why is the grass green? all the other colors in the electromagnetic spectrurm are absorbed except for green which is reflected and thats the only visable color

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Yo mamma so fat that she was chosen to be a contestant on the Biggest Loser and we are all so proud of the amount of weight she has lost.

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What do you call cheese that's not yours? Someone else's cheese.

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Roses are red, Violets are PURPLE.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It was being chased by a wolf that eventually killed and ate it.

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Knock knock! Who's there? The police, we found your cat's body on the side of the road.

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What is worse worse than stubbing your toe? The Holocaust.

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Why don't you have a seat, over there?

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What did the cow call the hen? A hen, what else would you call it?

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Knock, Knock. Who's there? Doctor. Doctor Who, Your Doctor, you have 5 months to live

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dog

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Steven Hawking walks into a bar. This of course is impossible, as his ailments prevent him from walking.

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Why does a ginger have no friends? Because it is a non sentient horizontal stem and thus incapable of forming complex social and emotional bonds with conscious organisms.

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Knock knock! Who's there? Dick! Dick who? Dick Stewart, your neighbor from next door!

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Cancer.

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Abraham Lincoln was the 16th Presient of the United States of America. The president to follow him was Andrew Johnson, president number 17.

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How many Alzheimer's patients does it take to screw in a light bulb? To get to the other side!

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Why couldn't the mexican feed his family? Because a large percent of mexican immigrants in the United States do not have jobs due to dicrimination against illegal immigrants crossing the soutern border, thus rendering them more vunerable to unemployment is that is vastly present in the United States.

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How much does a polar bear weigh? It depends on gender and environment, but a fully grown, adult, male polar bear weighs from 800 to 1600 pounds.

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What's the difference between a Elephant? It can neither bike...

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A guy walks into a bar. He orders a few drinks then goes home.

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Roses are red. Violets are blue. I have Alzheimer's. Where are the keys?

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obama is a good president

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What did Tom get for Christmas? Gloves, but Tom had no arms. Knock knock? Who's there? NOT TOM

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops