How do you make a napkin dance? You can't. Stop having such unrealistic aspirations.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

What's white and comes out of a long black stick? Milk with a long black straw.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

what do you call a room full of one terrorist and several babies? dead babies

thumb_up thumb_down +4

whats the difference between a black man and a bench a bench can support a family

thumb_up thumb_down +4

-Hey, Larry! How much is one plus one? -Two

thumb_up thumb_down +4

A guy walks into a bar. He orders a few drinks then goes home.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

what do you get if you cross a lion with a pig? nothing as the lion would more than likely end up eating the high in fat pig.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

- I have cancer. - SUCK IT UP!!!

thumb_up thumb_down +4

What is worse worse than stubbing your toe? The Holocaust.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

What is red and invisible? No tomatoes.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

What's better than winning at the special olympics? Not being retarded.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Knock Knock Bark, Bark, Bark, Bark, YELP! Whimper Whimper... Hey man, come on in.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

What is the diffrence between a strait guy and a gay guy? The strait guy gets into heaven.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Where did John go after the explosion? Everywhere.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Why does this dog have herpes? Global Warming.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

I have read the Terms of Service.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

How much does a polar bear weigh? It depends on gender and environment, but a fully grown, adult, male polar bear weighs from 800 to 1600 pounds.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

baby seal walks into a bar

thumb_up thumb_down

Why do witches ride on brooms? Because they have magical powers!

thumb_up thumb_down

Ya know why I hate bad puns? Because they aren't punny. In other words they have no real plot and don't make people laugh. They actually tend to get quite annoying.

thumb_up thumb_down

why do girls like 77? ................ ...................... ................. ...................... ................ becuz they get 8 more :P

thumb_up thumb_down -2

a little girl is playing outside of her house when i man in a van approaches her and stops to ask if the girl will help him find his puppy and that he has some gandy. seeing as the girl has a great love for animals she gets in the van. the man and the little girl drive around until they find the puppy. the man is so overjoyed her rewards the girl with candy. he then drives her back to her house and she feels wonderful having helped the man find his puppy. the end.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

KNOCK-KNOCK Who's there? There's a man after me, I was just walking down the street and he started chasing me! I'm scared, I don't know what he'll do. Let me in goddamnit! There's a man after me I was just walking down the street and he started chasing me I'm scared I don't know what he'll do let me in goddamnit who?

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Three blind men walk into a bar but they were unaware of their surroundings so to derive humour from them would be exploitative.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops