Rebecca Black

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I don't have cancer, but you do. Love, your doctor.

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women's rights.

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I like my women like I like my coffee... Without a penis.

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Q: what would george washington be doing if he were alive right now? A: screaming in his grave

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't. It was in the oven

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What's the difference between and onion and a dead baby? There is a big difference.

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what do a snake and a bird have in common? they can both fly! except for the snake.

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I hate being bipolar, it's so awesome.

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A man walks into a bar... And orders a drink

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Why did the japanese bomb pearl harbor? they wanted to weaken the US naval fleet to stop the US embargo on oil being shipped to japan

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A white guy, a mexican, and a terrorist each throw something out of airplane Then they realized it was a bad idea and karma gave them cancer because they may have hurt someone

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What did Jesus say to the Easter Rabbit? Nothing, it ran off before he could say anything. They're so skiddish, those pesky rabbits...

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How do you kill a blonde? lightsabre to the throat should do it

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A horse walks into a bar. The bartender says "what'll it be?" The horse, unable to understand human language. Takes a shit and walks out.

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What happens when you push an asian in a hole? He falls in

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Two hunters are out in the woods when one of them collapses. He doesn't seem to be breathing and his eyes are glazed. The other guy whips out his phone and calls the emergency services. He gasps, "My friend is dead! What can I do?". The operator says "Calm down. I can help. First, let's make sure he's dead." There is a silence, then the man said "he has a pulse". The operator then calmly stated "we are sending a helicopter to air lift him out of there as we speak". The man got helicoptered to the nearest ER, and the doctors did their best to save him. He ended up having to go on life support for three years until his family members finally decided to pull the plug. The medical insurance didn't cover life support and the family went broke because of it.

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why cant blondes water ski.......... because whenever they split their legs they feel somthing wet

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Knock knock! Who's there? Dick! Dick who? Dick Stewart, your neighbor from next door!

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because he died...

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Two scientists walk into a bar. The first one says “I’ll have some H2O.” The second says “I’ll have some H2O too.” Then he dies.

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Why did the young woman have a sore vagina? Because she just experienced intercourse for the first time and her partner was not as gentle as he should've been, given the situation.

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why is my brother white and i am brown? the milk man is very fast!

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Why is ya dad ya dad? ........ because of ya cousin

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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