What did Helen Keller's parents do to punish her? They gave her a stern talking to and then grounded her for a couple days.

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Your mama so fat, that it's starting to affect her relationship with her husband in a negative or harmful way. (CSC)

A black man walks into a predominantly white bar and is laughed at hysterically, the man is a world class comedian.

What do you call a man with three arms and three legs and no nose. A highly unlikely instance that no one would believe is real.

A man walks into a bar. The bartender asks what he'd like to drink. The man pulls out his gun, shoots the surprised bartender, and proceeds to execute all the patrons of the bar and finally commit suicide. A post-mortem identification of the man identifies him as a victim of childhood sexual abuse and a diagnosed schizophrenic. There is a nice funeral for all the victims and the media respectfully minimizes exposure of the event.

What's the difference between a Jew and a black person? Black people are good at running.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Loss of habitat.

whats the differnce between a baby and a dart board? dart boards dont bleed.

Whats orange and looks like an orange? An orange.

What's worse than a dead baby in a trash can? The grief the family feels at the loss of their newborn child.

Why cant i stand up? Cause i shat my pants

What did the Sony guy say when he hit the golf ball? PS FOUR!

Why was the woman convicted or arson? She set her house on fire. Why did she set her house on fire? Her husband was beating her.

Why did Sarah fall off the swing? She didn't have any arms. Knock knock. Who's there? Not Sarah.

how do you make a plumber cry? Kill his family.

A man walks into the corner of a table and bruises his leg. The bruise continues to be there for about 3 weeks.

What if I told you that our role our "little team" is not as little as you think?

From SpongeBob SquarePants "Hey Patrick, wanna know what's funnier than 24??" - SpongeBob "What?" - Patrick " 25!!!!" - SpongeBob There are a lot of things that are funnier than 24 though.

Roses are #FF0000 Violets are #0000FF

Why was six afraid of seven? Because seven had a raging hard-on and was leering at him.

Do you know that car over there? No.

Roses are red Violets are blue Little billy was annoying me But he can't anymore Because now he's dead In a burlap sack In the back of my truck And it's really bloody back there

A black man and a Mexican are hired as day laborers by a white man. The black man cleans the house while the Mexican mows and trims the yard. Both are hard-working and attempting to provide for their families in a down economy.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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