Why did the man steal 2 watermelons? He was a shoplifter and had a background of crime

minorities.

Roses Are Red Lemons are sour, open up your legs and give me an hour

what is black, white, and red all over? A bloody panda

Q: What did the black guy say when he stubbed his toe? A: Ouch.

Whats worse than a flat tire? penile fracture

What did the apple tree say to the farmer? Well! since trees nor apples have the ability to talk I would say the apple tree said nothing. And if the farmer thinks it did say something he should visit the doctors to check his hearing. The End.

I avhe dyiaexls.

What did Helen Keller's parents do to punish her? They gave her a stern talking to and then grounded her for a couple days.

What happened when the Asian girl got an 89 on her Test? Her parents kicked her out of their house.

Whats worse than meeting kim kardashian? everything shes the hottest freakin celeb there is

I don't often drink beer. But when I do, I recklessly beat my wife and kids.

How do you get a baby to stop crying You kill it

What do you call a Colombian who sells drugs? A pharmacist.

What did the monkey say to the garbage collector? Eiiiiijajajaajaja EIIIIJAAA

If you have 10 fish and you drown 5 how many do you have left? 10... you can't drown a fish, and even if you could you would still have 10 because there would still be there, they would just be dead. 5 alive, 5 dead

Why did the black guy go to jail, because he did illegal stuff.

What is brown and sticky?

Why did the baby cross the road? It was stapled to a chicken

Q: What happens when you throw a green rock in the Red Sea? A: It gets wet.

A tree walks into a bar. But it is a dead tree so it actually didn't

The President, a terrorist, a student, and a genius were on a crashing plane. They all died.

Where did the 5 gay guys go? One direction

Women's rights

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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