Why did the woman hate waiting in line? Two reasons really: almost an entire day had passed since her last intake of non-prescription drugs plus she was generally apprehensive that the witness would identify her.

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What's funnier than a midget bungie jumping? Nothing

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Why is your Mom so ugly? She was born that way

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Roses are red violets are blue I have a pie would you like some?

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Hey

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Why did the manager fire his black employee? Because he was stealing office supplies. Why was he stealing office supplies? Because he needed the money for his family. Why did he need that money? Because he wasn't being paid his full wage. Why wasn't he being paid full wage? Because his employer was a racist. Upon this analysis, the state of California ruled the case of Jones vs. Smith in favour of Mr. Jones, and ordered Mr. Smith to give Mr. Jones a cash settlement of $500,000. However, Mr. Jones was still convicted with a single charge of petty theft and was sentenced to six months in prison. His family was still awarded the settlement of $500,000. Mr. Jones made parole three months early for being an "idol inmate."

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What's black and white, and red all over? newspaper...

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Why couldn't the little boy find his friend in hide and go seek He was blind

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i wish i was a tree !

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What's better than a gold medal in the special olympics? ICE CREAM!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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What is red and not there? No tomatoes.

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Humpty Dumpty didn't fall I pushed him

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Knock Knock Who's there (five gunshots)

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A man shaves at least 3 times a week, yet he has the longest beard in town, how is that possible? He shaves his head because he's embarrassed about his rampant and patchy balding.

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Two Jewish Rabbis are sitting in a sandbox....

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You throw nothing like your mother; she is actually really good at throwing.

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nine...eleven

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Cancer.

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You wanna hear a joke about my penis Nevermind, it would be inappropriate of me to say such a thing.

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The chicken crossed the road and died. The end.

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Knock, Knock Who's There. You. You who. You are you. WTF!

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People Eating Tasty Animals

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Grapefruit.

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Your computer will self - destruct in 5 seconds

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops