A man is driving home from work. he realizes he left his suitcase back at the office. he turns around and drives back to the office. he walks in the office and grabs his suitcase, and as he's walking out he's stopped by his boss. his boss simply asks "what are you doing in the office at this time, Eric?" the man replies to his boss " sorry sir i was just grabbing my suitcase as i forgot to bring it as i was leaving work" his boss lets him pass " okay Eric, have a good night" the man get back in his car and drives home. but on his way home a pedestrian runs in front of the road. the man runs him over unintentionly. the man is jailed with manslaughter for 4 and a half years

Why couldn't the little boy skate? He had cancer.

Two muffins are in an oven, when one muffin says to the other "its hot in here." The other muffin then says, "whoa! a talking muffin!"

Q:whats the easiest way to get crabs? A:at your local seafood market.

Why did the man stay in the basement? Because he was addicted to pornography and it was tearing his family apart. Eventually he was unable to tell the diffidence between fantasy and reality and sexually assaulted his 13 year old niece.

Why did the boy cross the road Because he needed to get to the bus stop

suck my dick.

i hate you.

whats worse than a worm in a rotten apple? 2 worms in a rotten apple. whats worse than 2 worms in a rotten apple? 3 worms in a rotten apple. whats worse than 3 worms in a rotten apple? the haulocaust. whats worse than the haulocaust? 4 worms in a rotten apple. wait wait...that was rascist,nevermind this joke.

What did the vapyre eat for dinner? Nothing, they dont exist.

Why did Dave not hug his wife? Because she looked horrifying from the Iraq war.

boobs

how do you make a plumber cry? Kill his family.

A Horse walks into a bar. Bartender:why the long face? Horse:I have terminal cancer.

Yo mommas so stupid, she got raped.

Roses are red Violets are blue I'm not a very good poet

your mother is so lesbian

A Rabbi, A Priest and an Imam walk into a bar. The Imam doesn't order a drink because it is strictly against his religious beliefs.

What's worse than a School Bus accident? The Holocaust.

Why is Michael J Fox so good at using shake weights? Because he is motivated to stay in good physical shape.

Why did Billy fall down? Because his brain was replaced with a piece of toast.

Whats worse than finding one worm in your apple? Two worms.

How do you make a dog drink? You put the dog in a blender

im black

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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