Why was Ray Charles always smiling? because he was a happy guy

What do a grape and a spider have in common? Both have 8 legs..... Except for the grape.

Hey, I just met you And this is crazy, but you're getting too close And I'm about to file a restraining order, so back up, maybe?

how do you say desk in spanish? escritorio

What do you call a mouse that sings? Justin Bieber

Osama Bin Laden dies.

what do you do when you see a 40 ft tall gorilla? WHO CARES, RUN!

Four Chavs drove of a cliff today, why was a i sad? It was my car :C

What do you call cheese thats not yours? Somebody elses cheese

What walks like a duck, talks like a duck, but doesn't look like a duck? A horse named Quackie

What do you call a black man selling drugs? A pharmacist

why did the bird fall out of the tree? Earth's Gravitational pull

why cant blondes water ski.......... because whenever they split their legs they feel somthing wet

"knock knock" "who's there" nobody answered cus it was a bunch of little shits playing knock a door run

Knock knock! Who's there? The police, we found your cat's body on the side of the road.

R2-D2 is quite possibly the most vulgar character on the set of Star Wars. Every word he says is bleeped out.

You want to know what is worse than having a teen parent? Being a teen parent.

I am just trying to grasp the terms you use Nero, you are a genius, I mean I always heard about it, but honestly, well, my first impression of you here was... Different.

A horse walks into a bar. The bartender says "what'll it be?" The horse, unable to understand human language. Takes a shit and walks out.

A seal walks into a club.

What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

Why did the lady drop her shopping Because she ran into coles

Why don't you have a seat, over there?

A guy is playing cod

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...