Why can't a T-Rex clap his hands? Because its dead

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Stevie wonder walks across the road without looking both ways.

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Q: Why couldn't Helen Keller drive? A: Because she is a woman.

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Whats the difference between a black guy and a pizza? A black guy is a human being, and a pizza is a food you racist.

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Two colleague janitors sit next to each other in the coffee room, one says to the other: About yesterday... I checked three times and it looks pretty normal. Sorry... I wasn't around to hear the question the other posed the day before, but I heard it's supposed to be pretty funny with this answer. So... Less is better then none, right?

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What does a girl get from a dead MAN:)?? Nothing he is dead.

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knock knock who's there? julian julian who? julian gonzalez

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The President, the Pope, and a small child are in a plane when the pilot announces that they are about to crash. The plane hits the ocean. They quickly remember that there is a life jacket under their seats and they promptly put it on, but wait to inflate it (by pulling down on one or both of the red tabs) it until after exiting the cabin.

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Why did Tommy cry? His tear glands emptied out of his eyes

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What do you call a man with short legs? Whatever his name is

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Q: What word contains all the letters in the alphabet? A: A made-up word, probably.

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A man walks into a bar. Ouch.

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why couldn't the blonde change the light bulb? because he chose the wrong sized screwdriver from his tool box

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Why hasn't Justin Bieber gone through puberty. Usher Chopped his balls off.

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Justin Bieber

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KEVIN HART

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Wats wet and salty and people on the west coast get covered in it? Sweat.

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What did the mushroom jock say to the mushroom nerd? your and ugly wimpy mushroom....and i am on steroids

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Farmer Ned chased his chickens before they laid their eggs, because he likes his eggs scrambled.

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What's red and smells like cherries? Cherries

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A Horse walks into a Bar The Bartender runs for his life as he is tripping on acid and believes the horse is a sheep. He doesn't like sheep.

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Then there was that caveman that ordered a whiskey on the rocks...

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What did the kettle say to the pot? Nothing, inanimate objects can't talk.

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Three blondes walk into a community college.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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