Chuck Norris died.

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What did the mute say to the deaf man? Nothing. He's a mute.

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How do you make a baby eat his food? Make one first

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yo mama so fat the only thing stopping her from going to Jenny Craig is the size of the door...

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How many blonds does it take to kidnap a child? One.

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"Knock Knock" "Who's there?" "Jeff" "Jeff who?" "Jeff Johnson" "From the office?" "No I work at the dehli" "The one on 6th avenue?" "No, the one on Park." "What do you want?" "Could you open the door?" "No, I don't know you" "Isn't this Mr. Walter's house?" "No, my name is Roger Stevens" "I'm sorry I must be at the wrong house" "What address are you looking for?" "15322 N Gary street" "This is 15323 N Gary" "Oh I'm sorry" "Try knocking across the street" "Thank you"

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knock knock who's there a black person SHIT!!!!

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If you are going down the road in your boat and the pedal falls off how many cheese burgers can you eat 21 because a motorcycle doesnt have doors.

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How did the people get into the pyramid?? They didn't

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Why would anyone try to run from a fight if:Its not the size of the dog in the fight, its the size of the fight in the dog? I wasn't even talking about dogs and fight isn't something in you! Next time, don't listen to your football coach.

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A man. That is all.

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Lamborghini mercy, yo chick she so thirsty Swerve, swerve

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whats worse than flunking math? death.

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a priest a rabbi and a minister all walk into a bar and the bartender says "is this a joke?"

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How do you punish Helen Keller? Set a restriction on something she enjoys that is equal to the degree of her misbehavior.

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Why did Susie fall off of the swing? She was hit by an asteroid.

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What's the difference between a duck and a goose? They are obviously different species but they both have wings and are birds and are actually pretty similar. Geese are usually bigger though I guess.

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A feminist walked into a bar and had her period

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If you're a man, why don't you want to drop the soap in prison? The shower floors are disgusting and carry bacteria. No way would any person -- man or woman -- want to touch it.

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everyone's always talking about the emperor's clothes, don't they know this is murica

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What did the carrot say when he was Chopped. Auch.

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Why did the baby cross the street. Because he was attached to the chicken.

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Why did the Koala fall out of the tree? Cause it was dead. Why did the second Koala fall off the tree? Cause it was also dead. Why did the third Koala fall off the tree? It thought the other two were playing a game. Why did the motorcyclist end up in the hospital? He was attacked by falling Koalas!

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What do you call a black person trying to swim? Wet.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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