- Anti Joke

How did the people get into the pyramid?? They didn't

Yo mama is so fat, that she recieves an allowance due to being physically disabled.

Wanna hear a joke? Me too.

Why would anyone try to run from a fight if:Its not the size of the dog in the fight, its the size of the fight in the dog? I wasn't even talking about dogs and fight isn't something in you! Next time, don't listen to your football coach.

Abstract thinking part one of... One: What kind of idiot tries to run trough a wall, rather than to just use the door? The "Idiot" is in a cell whose walls are made of thin wood plates, the door is made of steel and locked. How I cured my own damn anxiety five hundred of one: Now this is real see? I got stressed, damn it was like something that was not me but my body scared as shit began fearing for its life right my arms shaking like fuck sweat and all that crapa? So I got pissed got in front of the mirror, stared at myself and shouted "GODDAMN BODY YOU THINKS YOU CAN CONTROL ME? IF YOU DO NOT STOP BEING SO FUCKING AFRAID OF DEATH! THEN I WILL KILL YOU MYSELF!" So yeah unconventional indeed, but it worked for five times, and I never had to use it anymore. Moral: My own body and every fucking cell of it, is not the only one that fears me more than death.

i yoused to cry a little when i laughed . then i got raped by a clown.

How do women learn to drive? Drivers ED.

in 2001 a man was working happily in his office cubicle and got an email from his boss saying that he had great news for him. filled with excitment he knew he was getting A big promotion and could finally afford that new toy his kid has always wanted. Feeling great the man walks up to the office window to enjoy the view he notices a very large commercial airliner flying straight towards his office.

whats worse than flunking math? death.

What's worse than biting into your apple and finding a worm in it? Biting into you apple and finding two worms in it.

When I was at the beach digging in the sand I looked down and someone said nehow

An octopus walks into a bar. The people in the bar, realizing the potential of danger, stand up and leave the bar quietly.

how do you say desk in spanish? escritorio

A women gets a call saying her only daughter is trapped inside a burning building. She runs as fast as she can too her car before she realizes... women can't drive due to their role in society.

You are the weakest link. Goodbye.

Knock knock Who's there? Prost Prost who Prostitute

Q.What is the bigest lie in the universe? A. I have read and agree the the Terms of Service.

Knock Knock! Who's There? Not Steve Jobs.

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You can lead a horse to water, but you can't put it in a basket.

I am just trying to grasp the terms you use Nero, you are a genius, I mean I always heard about it, but honestly, well, my first impression of you here was... Different.

Roses are grey, violets are grey, im a dog

Did you know Dr Pepper isn't really a doctor?

Hey what time is it. 3:15

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK! Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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