Why don't you have a seat, over there?

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because chickens have feeble minds and tend to wander around.

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Why did the lady drop her shopping Because she ran into coles

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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How do you make a girl happy then sad within 5 seconds? Buy her a pony and then shoot it

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How do you make a napkin dance? You can't. Stop having such unrealistic aspirations.

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What did batman say to the Joker? I'm Batman

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Why was the boy sad? He had a Ford Taurus stapled to his face.

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What is fat and ugly? Your American MUM!

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Dozer has a soul

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http://www.ladsta.com

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What is one of the symtoms of clinical depression? Sadness.

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So there's this bigass moose, and it goes in the store and it asks the lady bitch "where the potatoes at" and the lady bitch says "down aisle 5" so the moose goes down to isle 5 and there aint no potatoes.

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-Hey, Larry! How much is one plus one? -Two

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I have read the Terms of Service.

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You know George Washington? He died.

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Why did the little girl fall off the swing? I don't know. I wasn't there.

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Q: What's the difference between a trampoline and a pile of dead babies? A: You can't wear cleats on a trampoline.

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What is the diffrence between a strait guy and a gay guy? The strait guy gets into heaven.

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Alright, if you guess it right, I'll stop playing Mario and finish my division problems. Okay, Mom, call it in the air! Heads or Tails? Huntington's Disease is the reason your Father doesn't remember your name anymore, Billy. There's a fifty percent chance you'll end up with it too. I am so sorry. Also, Tails.

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Disregard Females, Acquire Currency.

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Q: What do you call a robot in a concert? A: Electric fan

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? 7 is black.

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Your Mama is so stupid She shot herself by accident and died. Your family has not stopped mourning since

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops