If you put a bee in the freezer, it will get cold and fall asleep. After it’s asleep, put it in your mouth, but don’t eat it. Just let it sit there. It will get warm and wake up. Now you have a bee in your mouth.

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Sit on Santas lap Boner

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What did the fish say when he ran into a wall underwater? dam

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What did the patient say when the doctor told him he had aids? "Oh my god. Are you sure?"

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Why did Obama win the president election He had a greater amount of votes that Jonh mccain

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What do you call a horse with wings? Nonexistant. Welcome to the real world kid.

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Why do Squirrels accidentally plant millions of trees. Because they they bury their nuts and forget where they are.

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ring ring young man: dad? mom's dead? woman: i think you dialed the wrong number young man: .......oh im sorry, you're absolutely right, silly me! woman: don't worry about it. young man: (chuckles) click

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whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? genocide whats worse than genocide? getting raped by a giant scorpion

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im dylan, i wank over teabaging people on cod

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What is worse than falling into a pit of needles? being lit on fire and then falling into a pit of needles I imagine

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Whats funnier than a anti-joke? 911

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I enjoy telling anticlimactic jokes Very much.

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Whats the difference between a cobra and the hulk? One is my penis and the other one is a cobra.

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Whats red and smells like blue paint? A blue waffle.

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What do you call a man with no arms and no legs in the middle of the ocean? SOL.

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Boy: Doctor! Doctor! I can't see my arm! Doctor: It's because your blind son

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Bumsniffer

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69

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Hi my name is Burp -you can call me Bu Nice to meet you

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What's the difference between a lamborghini and a sackful of dead babies? one is a car and the other is a grotesque travesty.

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I love my new microwave. It comes with a list that tells just how long to cook things. Now i know how long to cook a baby for

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I like the Tsarnaev brothers. They ran the Boston marathon and had a BLAST!

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Boobs are nasty!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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