I'm not wearing underwear Why not Cause I have built in underwear

what has two legs and bleeds? half a dog

Why did the boy eat his homework? Because he already ate his dog.

Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she was born with the disorders of being blind and deaf. For any human, having blindness and deafness makes driving a near impossible task.

why couldnt the gay man marry??? cause he was dead.

Why did the rabbit like to wear shoes? It doesn't.

knock knock, who's there? you goodbye

dumbledore says,"today we will learn new spells,any questions?" a student says,"are you serious?" dumbledore says,"no he is in jail for a crime he didn't commit,sort of like the a-team."

There once was a beautiful princess named Snow White who lived with seven dwarves in the forest. One day, and old hag approached her and offered her an apple. She bit into the apple, chewed, and said,"Wow, that's tasty. Is this a Golden Delicious?" The hag said, "Why yes, it is. I have a private orchard. Perhaps I'll let you see it some time." The two promptly resumed their lives.

Why can't an elephant smoke cigarettes? They do not posses the fine motor skills.

Kittens.

Why didn't the Mammoth go to school? Because his species went extinct before the development of organized education. And he's also a Mammoth.

Why did the archaeologist bury his brother? Because he was dead.

How do you know a dude is dead? He doesn't breath, he has no color in the face and his heart has stoped.

Why did video kill the radio star? He slept with videos wife.

The doctor comes out of the room and tells the new parents that there is good news and bad news. The couple says they want to hear the bad news first. The doctor says "your baby is black." The couple then ask "what is the good news?", the doctor replies "your baby is dead."

Why did the chicken cross the road? To mourn the loss of his daughter who died due a fatal car crash, caused by him while he was driving. across the street

What do you call a man with three arms and three legs and no nose. A highly unlikely instance that no one would believe is real.

What did the apple tree say to the farmer? Well! since trees nor apples have the ability to talk I would say the apple tree said nothing. And if the farmer thinks it did say something he should visit the doctors to check his hearing. The End.

What Starts with P and ends with O-R-N? Popcorn.

So I was talking dirty to this deaf chick right...She didn't hear me.

Why was johny late to school? He died

Women's sports.

Roses are red Violets are blue I rhyme like lil Wayne Fridge

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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