How do you kill a fly? Shoot it

Why was six afraid of seven? Because seven had a raging hard-on and was leering at him.

I'm not as random as you think i salad.

2 blonds are driving on the road on their way to Disney Land. They come to the sign that says Disney Land left so they started crying, turned around and went home.

What is red and bad for your teeth? A brick.

What's red and bad for your teeth? A brick.

yo mama so fat, she wheres glasses to see better!

roses are red violets are blue i dont really care about you

Why did the first monkey fall out of the tree ? Because he was dead. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was attached to the first monkey. Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? Because he thought it was a game. Why did the tree fall over? It thought it was a monkey.

Q: how do you tame a dingo? A: Feed it babies

newt gingrich

What do you get when you cross a grizzly bear and a dolphin? Well, the odds of these two animals mating are slim to none. Due to the undeniable fact that dolphins live in the ocean primarily in the warmer tropical waters and grizzly bears live on land in the pacific northwest where the water would be too cold for the dolphin anyway. The dolphin would be swimming around avoiding sharks and the bear would probably be eating a salmon. But if they did breed you would get a dolphinbear. Although a dolphinbear would have a very low chance of survival given it's part dolphin. Dolphins are pussies.

What's black and white and red all over? A black, white, and red painting.

why do cats hate dogs? because cats were bullied by dogs in highschool.

Why did the chicken cross the road? He farted

What do you call a black pilot? Whatever his name is, you racist.

What animal is green and eats a green rockeater? A green green rockeater eater. What animal is green and eats a green green rockeater eater? A frog.

what did Johnny get for Halloween. ebola

a rabbi sees a nazi in time square. he simply walks past because as we are in america the nazi can do nothing to harm him.

I like my woman like I like my coffee. Good.

knock knock who's there? al-Qaeda

What's worse than Bin Weevils? Nick Clegg.

Tacos

You are the weakest link. Goodbye.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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