Why did the girl fall out of the swing? Because she had no arms. They were lost in a tractor accident.

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Why do witches ride on brooms? Because they have magical powers!

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What is this, a center for ants? No, this is a model of the building proportionally smaller than the one we will be building.

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Roses are red, violet are blue I have AIDS

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No.

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So a man rapes a little girl but rips her eyes out before he does it. In court he said the appropriate thing about this was that she could not see it cuming.

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You know what's sad about the Special Olympics? Even of you win, your still retarded.

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Your Mama is so stupid She shot herself by accident and died. Your family has not stopped mourning since

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a little girl is playing outside of her house when i man in a van approaches her and stops to ask if the girl will help him find his puppy and that he has some gandy. seeing as the girl has a great love for animals she gets in the van. the man and the little girl drive around until they find the puppy. the man is so overjoyed her rewards the girl with candy. he then drives her back to her house and she feels wonderful having helped the man find his puppy. the end.

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A duck walks into a 7-11 and says "Give me some chapstick, put it on my bill!" But the cash register attendee doesn't speak English and cannot understand him. He does, however, question whether his God is punishing him because as all people know, Ducks cannot speak, however, this hallucination must be punishment for a horrid misdeed. The employee breaks down into tears and begins reciting prayer. The duck, slightly miffed, walks out, pondering why he'd need chapstick anyway, since he has no lips.

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How many black guys does it take to change a lightbulb? None can, since noone can work together because they cant see eachother.

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How do you stop a plane? Throw flying birds at it.

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why did the boy dress up like a girl? because he has autism.

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When life gives you lemons, make lemonade.

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What's worse than a bee sting? Two bee stings. What's worse than two bee stings? The Holocaust. What's worse than the Holocaust? Three bee stings.

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what has a huge nose and is jewish??? Henery Miller!!!!!

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What do you get when you mix red and yellow? Orange.

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What happened september 11th, 2001 It was my first time snorkoling in Hawaii

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Why did the girl fall off of the swing? Because she had no arms.

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whats difference between a bench and a mexican? a mexican isnt a bench

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Roses are red Violets are blue This difference is due largely to the alteration of the white light wavelenght as it excites the electrons in both flowers and the absorption of most of the other colours of the spectrum.

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What is black, white, and red all over? A domino dipped in kitten blood.

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Whats funnier than a anti-joke? 911

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I used to be an adventurer like you, Until I lost both my arms.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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