Of two wrongs don't make a right what do they make? I don't know but three rights make a left

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Why was Adam sad his dog got ran over? He was holding the dog.

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"This is not a drill!" - guy holding a hammer

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Yo mommas so stupid, she got raped.

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When life gives you lemons, make a lemon and tamarind chutney.

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The little mouse lifted the giant Elephant up so the Elephant could reach the bag of snacks, but then the Elephant said: I cant reach it, you must be tired so lets switch places... Squish: Squish! Elephant: Mouse! Where are you! *looks at "squish" NO! THIS WAS NOT THE WAY THE JOKE WAS SUPPOSED TO BE!!!!!!! Moral: Elephants cant talk...

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What's the difference between a watermelon and a baby? A watermelon is edible.

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How do you kill a fly? Shoot it

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Why couldn't the women drive? She was dead

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A man falls into a lake but no one is around to help him, luckily the man can swim so he got out of the lake and went home feeling embarrassed

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A: Ask me if im a fire hydrant. B: Are you a fire hydrant? A: No...

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What's 5+7? Piccillo

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Why did Billy fall down? Because his brain was replaced with a piece of toast.

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What's red and invisible? No tomatoes.

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A black man and a Mexican are hired as day laborers by a white man. The black man cleans the house while the Mexican mows and trims the yard. Both are hard-working and attempting to provide for their families in a down economy.

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dead babies

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Whats worse than finding one worm in your apple? Two worms.

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What's the most annoying thing in the world? Yourself. (Your friends are saying it too, behind your back)

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Why can't a T-Rex clap his hands? Because its dead

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KEVIN HART

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Jesus walks into a hotel, slams four nails down on the counter, and says, "Put me up for the night!" The concierge looks at him and says, "You're not Jesus. Jesus was brutally murdered approximately 1,970 years ago. And although I may not be a believer, his teachings have brought comfort and solace to millions of people around the world. Nor do we accept nails as payment. Please remove yourself from the premises or I will call security."

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Why was the panda sad? It's family died when China had an earthquake.

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A Mexican walked away from a construction site.

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What animal is green and eats a green rockeater? A green green rockeater eater. What animal is green and eats a green green rockeater eater? A frog.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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