baby seal walks into a bar

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whats 2+2? 69 LOL

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What do a bunch of dead babies look like in a blender? I don't know I was too busy masturbating.

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Disregard Females, Acquire Currency.

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Knock Knock Bark, Bark, Bark, Bark, YELP! Whimper Whimper... Hey man, come on in.

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Haha

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nine...eleven

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Why did the lizard turn blue? He was low on oxygen.

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This one time, at band camp we played in a band

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A handicapped man rolls into a bar. He buys a drink, talks for a while, and rolls out.

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A straight man walks into a lesbian bar. He quickly realizes his mistake and leaves.

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Your Mama is so stupid She shot herself by accident and died. Your family has not stopped mourning since

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co jo kurwa tocza?

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A man walks into a bar.

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What is this, a center for ants? No, this is a model of the building proportionally smaller than the one we will be building.

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A priest, a rabbi, and a minister are in a boat in the middle of the lake when a lightning bolt flashes out of the sky and hits them. Fortunately, no one died because only about 10% of those struck are killed.

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What's worse than a baby in a car accident? The baby survives and has a mental problem, grows up, and then drives the same car and gets in another accident.

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Yo momma is so fat that she is large.

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Why did the bird fall? It was an ostrich

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What do your friends and a tree have in common? They both die if you set them on fire.

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Whats worse than ants in your pants? Uncles.

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'THIS IS NOT A JOKE, YOU ARE THE 1000000TH VIEWER'...

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There are four worms moving in a straight line, one in front of the other. The first worm says, "Hey, there's a worm walking behind me!" The second worm says, "Hey, there's a worm walking behind me, too!" The third worm says, "Hey, there's a worm walking behind me, too!" The third worm says, "Hey, there's a worm walking behind me, too!" How can this be? ...the fourth worm lied.

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im dylan, i wank over teabaging people on cod

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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