Your mama's so fat her patronus is a cake

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock knock. Who's there? Not Sally.

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Chuck Norris died.

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knock knock your gay

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Why did the girl hang herself? She was constantly bullied in school and on the internet.

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How many women does it take to screw in a light bulb? Who knows? They all just sit and bitch about it.

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A: Ask me if im a fire hydrant. B: Are you a fire hydrant? A: No...

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why couldn't the blonde change the light bulb? because he chose the wrong sized screwdriver from his tool box

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What is as ugly as Justin Bieber's face? Justin Bieber's face.

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What do you say to jacks mum when your having Sex? Nothing she's dead.

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How do you get four gay guys on a bar stool? With teamwork and coordination, each could place one foot on the seat, and they can all stand up using each other for balance and support. The fact that they are gay in unimportant.

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What's the most annoying thing in the world? Yourself. (Your friends are saying it too, behind your back)

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Your mother

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A man walks in a bar. He walks out.

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why did the baby cross the road...? cause he was chained to my bumper

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Knock Knock. Whose there? Not your dead mom.

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What do you call Obama? - the president

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How do you make a mail man cry? Run him over with a forklift.

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Why did the monkey eat his own poop? Because there was minimal resources where he was so he resorted to eat his own fecal matter

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What did the mute say to the deaf man? Nothing. He's a mute.

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Sup homie G. Shutup you are not black.

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Why'd the first koala fall out of the tree? He died. Why'd the second koala fall out of the tree? He was stapled to the first koala. Why'd the third koala fall out of the tree? He thought it was a game. Why'd the refrigerator fall out of the tree? He thought he was a koala. Why'd the boy fall off the swing? He was hit by 3 koalas and a refrigerator. Why'd the boy fall off his bike? He had no arms or legs

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"Knock Knock" "Who's there?" "Jeff" "Jeff who?" "Jeff Johnson" "From the office?" "No I work at the dehli" "The one on 6th avenue?" "No, the one on Park." "What do you want?" "Could you open the door?" "No, I don't know you" "Isn't this Mr. Walter's house?" "No, my name is Roger Stevens" "I'm sorry I must be at the wrong house" "What address are you looking for?" "15322 N Gary street" "This is 15323 N Gary" "Oh I'm sorry" "Try knocking across the street" "Thank you"

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 6 was racist.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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