knock knock. who's there? I am. I am who? I am pregnant

really desperate to get laid guy gives out phone number in random places 5802352343 :D

What did Santa Claus say to the young boy on Christmas Day? Santa Claus is a myth, that was actually a pedophile.

What did the black man say to the other black man? Nothing, he was recently involved in a terrible car accident which he barely survived but lost the function of speech and was paralysed from the neck downwards. He is constantly in pain and desperately wants someone to kill him but has no way of communicating this so is forced to wait until his natural death.

What's blue and smells like pee? Pee, I lied about the color

Your mama's so fat her patronus is a cake

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding half a worm.

Whoa! A talking carrot!

why did the 1st koala fall out of the tree ? it was dead why did the 2nd koala fall out of the tree ? it was hit by the first koala why did the 3rd koala fall out of the tree ? it thought it was a game why did the 4th koala fall out of the tree ? it was hit by a fridge why did the 5th koala fall out of the tree ? it was inside the fridge

Why did the bride get a refrigerator for her wedding? Because it is a very nice present

What do you call a deaf person whom is behind the wheel of a car about to run off a cliff? ....

Why did the chicken cross the road? He farted

What is as ugly as Justin Bieber's face? Justin Bieber's face.

Q: What's black and blue and red all over? A: I'm not sure. If it's red all over, it's not going to be black or blue.

What's worse than 20 babies stapled to one tree? Getting life imprisonment after...

What do you call a black man on the moon? An astronaut

Whats the difference between a black guy and a pizza? A black guy is a human being, and a pizza is a food you racist.

What do you call a group of black gentle men running down a hill A group of black gentle men running down a hill

yo mama so fat, she wheres glasses to see better!

A horse walks into a glue factory..

why did the baby cross the road...? cause he was chained to my bumper

Two colleague janitors sit next to each other in the coffee room, one says to the other: About yesterday... I checked three times and it looks pretty normal. Sorry... I wasn't around to hear the question the other posed the day before, but I heard it's supposed to be pretty funny with this answer. So... Less is better then none, right?

Why does 4 +5 = Hitler? It doesnt it equals 9.

Why did the chicken cross the road? I don't know, it is unclear what the chicken's motivation to cross the road was.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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