Why do firemen wear red suspenders? To hold their pants up.

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your momma is so old, she has heart problems

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Why are girls large and round? Because they are raised by wild packs of oompa loompas.

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so a guy walks into the bar...i forget the rest of the jokes but your mother is a whore.

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a. get me a drink b. a would but but i got no arms

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a horse walks into a bar and the bartender says "why the long face?" and the horse says "my wife has terminal cancer.

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Why is there so much hate in the world? Because you touch yourself at night.

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You want to hear a joke? Democract

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alright whoever posted it, like this, then comment your first name

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What's worse then finding a repeated joke on antijokes? Finding a real joke.

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what's the funniest anti joke? not this one

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What did the blind, deaf rabbit get for Easter? . . . Eaten by a by a lion.

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What's the difference between me and you? Dr. Dre

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There once was a beautiful princess named Snow White who lived with seven dwarves in the forest. One day, and old hag approached her and offered her an apple. She bit into the apple, chewed, and said,"Wow, that's tasty. Is this a Golden Delicious?" The hag said, "Why yes, it is. I have a private orchard. Perhaps I'll let you see it some time." The two promptly resumed their lives.

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What do you call a jew with no money It doesn't really matter because all jews have money

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What did the vapyre eat for dinner? Nothing, they dont exist.

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A man walks into a bar. The bartender asks what he'd like to drink. The man pulls out his gun, shoots the surprised bartender, and proceeds to execute all the patrons of the bar and finally commit suicide. A post-mortem identification of the man identifies him as a victim of childhood sexual abuse and a diagnosed schizophrenic. There is a nice funeral for all the victims and the media respectfully minimizes exposure of the event.

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Why was the little kid bullied? Because his name was Hugh Jass.

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I don't often drink beer. But when I do, I recklessly beat my wife and kids.

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here's a great way to ruin someone's 'knock knock' joke: Knock knock Come in!

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whats the differnce between a baby and a dart board? dart boards dont bleed.

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What is the difference between a Ferrari and a dead hooker? One is a car and one is a human being.

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What comes to mind when you say the word "Mind?" Your Mind

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What do you call a Colombian who sells drugs? A pharmacist.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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