Why was six afraid of seven? It wasn't. Numbers have no feelings.

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I pissed myself the other day in Harrods when I saw a Somalian boy run up to a curtain saying mummy.

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A black man is packing heat while driving his car. He is a police officer

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What did the rape victim say to the rapist? "mmfff...mmm.....mmmmm"

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Whats white, and edible? white chocolate

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Roses are red, Violets are blue.

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Knock knock! Who's there? Boo. Oh hey man, you got the meth?

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What did the little boy get for Christmas? Nothing, hes Jewish.

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What did the boy with cancer get for christmas? -A haircut

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Knock knock. Come in. Okay.

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How many Jehovah's Witnesses does it take to screw in a light bulb? 2. One to firmly hold the ladder and the other to cautiously screw it in. They are volunteering at the local orphanage and it is wrong to make fun of there religion. We are all different in our own special way.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I own a lawn mower Can you swim?

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Why is Obama's name Obama? Obama

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Whats worst then the Holocaust? Two holocaust's.

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Why didn't the bear go snowboarding? It was hibernating

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Wife: Do you know what the most untruthful lie I've told you? Husband: What? Wife: That I love you. By the way I'm leaving you for your father. The twins are gay and in love with each other and your daughter is a hooker with AIDS. Your mother killed herself upon hearing all this news. She suffered a lot. Oh, the dog died by rat poisoning that your dad put in the backyard. Bye.

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Why can't Jesus eat M&M's? Because they keep falling through the holes in his hands.

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How do you catch a squirrel? Use a live, humane trap, and release it back into the wild afterwards.

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why did i go on the rollercoaster? because there was a muffin on it

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AVI IS A FAG

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What is the difference between a grape and an elephant? They are both grapes, except for the elephant.

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Women's Rights

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How do you kill a blonde? lightsabre to the throat should do it

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Two Jewish men walk into a butcher shop. They don't buy any pork because that is a fundamental dietary restriction placed upon by their religion.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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