Why is Obama's name Obama? Obama

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Wife: Do you know what the most untruthful lie I've told you? Husband: What? Wife: That I love you. By the way I'm leaving you for your father. The twins are gay and in love with each other and your daughter is a hooker with AIDS. Your mother killed herself upon hearing all this news. She suffered a lot. Oh, the dog died by rat poisoning that your dad put in the backyard. Bye.

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Why didn't the bear go snowboarding? It was hibernating

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Whats worst then the Holocaust? Two holocaust's.

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How do you catch a squirrel? Use a live, humane trap, and release it back into the wild afterwards.

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Why can't Jesus eat M&M's? Because they keep falling through the holes in his hands.

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why did i go on the rollercoaster? because there was a muffin on it

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What is the difference between a grape and an elephant? They are both grapes, except for the elephant.

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AVI IS A FAG

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Women's Rights

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Two Jewish men walk into a butcher shop. They don't buy any pork because that is a fundamental dietary restriction placed upon by their religion.

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How do you kill a blonde? lightsabre to the throat should do it

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Why is Justin beaber so white? Because his mother and father both are.

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your mom is so poor that she is unable to pay for your child care leaving you to have a terrible childhood, troubled adolescence, and eventually lie passed out in an alley after OD'ing off of heroin.

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A Black a Jew and a Pollack walk in to the bar bartender says "how may i help you gentlemen"

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Whats the difference between a jew and a boy scout boy scouts come back from camp

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Two hunters are out in the woods when one of them collapses. He doesn't seem to be breathing and his eyes are glazed. The other guy whips out his phone and calls the emergency services. He gasps, "My friend is dead! What can I do?". The operator says "Calm down. I can help. First, let's make sure he's dead." There is a silence, then the man said "he has a pulse". The operator then calmly stated "we are sending a helicopter to air lift him out of there as we speak". The man got helicoptered to the nearest ER, and the doctors did their best to save him. He ended up having to go on life support for three years until his family members finally decided to pull the plug. The medical insurance didn't cover life support and the family went broke because of it.

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What's better than a gold medal in the special olympics? ICE CREAM!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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What does a person that is fasting get for Christmas? Food.

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Why couldn't the prostitute count to 70? She grew up in a poor family and couldn't pay for a good education.

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What is fat and ugly? Your American MUM!

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So I'm balls deep in this turkey dinner....... then i proceed to ejaculate into it and ruin my family's Thanksgiving along with their perception of me.

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Write your own

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HTML

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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