knock knock who's there? al-Qaeda

thumb_up thumb_down +18

What do you tell a woman with two black eyes? That she should train harder for her next boxing match, or find a less physically demanding hobby to partake in.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

What is Chuck Norris's favorite musical theme? Tanana na na naa naa na, ta ta ta tanana na naa na ta na na.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

Why would anyone try to run from a fight if:Its not the size of the dog in the fight, its the size of the fight in the dog? I wasn't even talking about dogs and fight isn't something in you! Next time, don't listen to your football coach.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

How did the people get into the pyramid?? They didn't

thumb_up thumb_down +16

ron:jim i cant get the toaster to work jim:dude thats a thats my car!

thumb_up thumb_down +16

whats worse than flunking math? death.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Communism

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Why didn't the black man pay for his child support bills? He made some unwise financial decisions in the past and is working three part time jobs just to stay afloat.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

How do you punish Helen Keller? Set a restriction on something she enjoys that is equal to the degree of her misbehavior.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

a priest a rabbi and a minister all walk into a bar and the bartender says "is this a joke?"

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Whats worse than black people : a grimy old woman lickin your toes

thumb_up thumb_down +14

how do you say desk in spanish? escritorio

thumb_up thumb_down +12

A feminist walked into a bar and had her period

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Why did Susie fall off of the swing? She was hit by an asteroid.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

What did the carrot say when he was Chopped. Auch.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

everyone's always talking about the emperor's clothes, don't they know this is murica

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a loaf of bread.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

What do you call a black person trying to swim? Wet.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Why did the Koala fall out of the tree? Cause it was dead. Why did the second Koala fall off the tree? Cause it was also dead. Why did the third Koala fall off the tree? It thought the other two were playing a game. Why did the motorcyclist end up in the hospital? He was attacked by falling Koalas!

thumb_up thumb_down +10

A black guy walks into a bar with a beatiful parrot on his shoulder. "Wow," says the bartender. "That is really something. Where'd you get it?" The parrot was his fathers. Do to severe mental and physical illness, he can no longer take care of it. He asked his son to take it, those were his last words as he slipped into a coma

thumb_up thumb_down +10

why is the grass green? all the other colors in the electromagnetic spectrurm are absorbed except for green which is reflected and thats the only visable color

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Q: What Did Batman Say To Robin When They Got In The Car? A: Get In The Car

thumb_up thumb_down +8

What did the Irisman say to the bartender? Don't know? i don't speak Irish?

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops