"This is not a drill!" - guy holding a hammer

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I'm not as random as you think i salad.

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women's lacrosse.

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What did the robot do when a person was shot? Nothing, it wasn't programmed for that situation.

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What did the black man say to the other black man? Nothing, he was recently involved in a terrible car accident which he barely survived but lost the function of speech and was paralysed from the neck downwards. He is constantly in pain and desperately wants someone to kill him but has no way of communicating this so is forced to wait until his natural death.

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there are 2 black guys and a spanish guy in a car. who is driving? a sober, US citizen over the age of 16

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Whats green and fuzzy, and if it falls out of a tree you'll die? A pool table.

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Why did the white guy feel awkward at the black people convention? He didn't know anyone there

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here's a great way to ruin someone's 'knock knock' joke: Knock knock Come in!

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You wanna hear a clean joke? I took a bath with bubbles. Wanna hear a dirty joke? I slipped in mud. Wanna hear an even dirtier joke? Bubbles is a guy..

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do you know what's so funny? yup

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Q: Why did the cookie go to the doctor? A: Because he had terminal brain cancer.

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What did the black man say to the latino man? Nothing he was far to busy trying to get a cab to his office meeting for his board of directors do not appreciate tardiness

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A tree walks into a bar. But it is a dead tree so it actually didn't

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Have you seen Stevie Wonders new house. No. Neither has he

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Why do cows have tails? Because my pet rock stopped breathing.

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Two colleague janitors sit next to each other in the coffee room, one says to the other: About yesterday... I checked three times and it looks pretty normal. Sorry... I wasn't around to hear the question the other posed the day before, but I heard it's supposed to be pretty funny with this answer. So... Less is better then none, right?

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A black man and a Mexican are hired as day laborers by a white man. The black man cleans the house while the Mexican mows and trims the yard. Both are hard-working and attempting to provide for their families in a down economy.

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I've got the moobs like jagger.

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What did the homeless man get for Christmas? Nothing..

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Two men sit down at a bar. First man: I hear you're having a baby! Second man: My wife had a miscarriage. First man: Oh.... The talking ceased

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666 im christian

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Stevie wonder walks across the road without looking both ways.

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A Horse walks into a Bar The Bartender runs for his life as he is tripping on acid and believes the horse is a sheep. He doesn't like sheep.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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