Why the worker did not come to work? Because he died!

What did the husband tell his obese wife? I love you honey

What is one thing you can't buy at the store? Toast

a blond, brunette, and red head run away from cops and hide in potato sacks. the officer went up to the brunette and kicked the potato bag and the brunette went "woof" "woof". the officer went to the red head and kicked the potato bag and the red head went "meow" "meow". the officer goes to the blond and kicked the potato bag and the blond went "potato".

Why did the cow go moo, because its a cow

Whats Asian and longer than 2 inches? chopsticks.

why couldnt the gay man marry??? cause he was dead.

Bin Laden is dead.

-Knock knock -Come on in!

Knock knock (No one is home)

How do you wake up Lady Gaga? Drop a brick on her face.

Santa Claus, "Ho ho ho!" Asain Santa Claus, "Hohohohohohohoho!" Pedophile Santa Claus, "Ho ho ho! Come and sit on my lap children!" Dyslexic Santa Claus, "Oh oh oh! Merry Shitcrams!" Narcopleptic Santa Claus, "Ho ho..." *snores*. Black Santa Claus, well, I wouldn't like the idea of a black fat guy breaking into my house, eating my cookies, drinking my milk, and leaving presents under my tree. Would you?

Why doesn't Superman eat peanuts? He doesn't like them

Why can't Ray Charles read? Because he's black.

What does Lady Gaga call Hitler? Nothing special because she doesn't refer to him in everyday's speech.

What did the otter say to the pumpkin? I'm so glad I'm a walrus

What do you call a person with no eyes? Blind.

What did Billy get his parents for Christmas? Billy's an orphan.

You're mom is so slutty, she has sex with many men.

How do you have sex with an amputee? stick it in the eyes

Whats worse than HIV? AIDS

holly, a japanese boy and an american boy walked into a internet cafe. They then began to play runescape so they could train together and trade rare items.

I'm on the seafood diet. A large proportion of my daily food intake is fish.

Why don't they sell pharmaceuticals in the rain forest? Because it is to sparsely populated and not economically viable.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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