What did the black man say when he received cold fried chicken at a restaurant? He very politely asked for it to be warmed up, and exuded nothing but elegance and class.

Two muffins are in the oven, one looks at the other and says, "it sure is hot in here." The other responds, "AAhHH a TALKING MUFFIN."

How can you tell you're in a childrens' ambulance from the inside? From the clown patterned body bags.

The procrastinators association meeting has been postponed. - Anonymous

Fuzzy wuzzy was a bear, fuzzy wuzzy had no hair, fuzzy wuzzy had cancerand died

A black guy walks into a bar with a beatiful parrot on his shoulder. "Wow," says the bartender. "That is really something. Where'd you get it?" The parrot was his fathers. Do to severe mental and physical illness, he can no longer take care of it. He asked his son to take it, those were his last words as he slipped into a coma

Do yo know what a decasexual is? A decasexual, as defined on various websites, is somebody who has strong physical attractions to male humans, female humans, male animals, female animals, sounds, smells, tastes, feelings, movements and objects. The term decasexual derives from the latin language, meaning "ten sexualities". Decasexuals exist everywhere.

a man walks into a bar..... the man pulls out a gun and robs the place as he is exiting he bumps into a child the child falls in the street and is crushed by a bus. the bus in an attempt to avoid the child swerves and hits a maternity clinic next to a gas station that promptly explodes. the robber so distraught he trys to shoot himself but the gun misfired and the man was arrested and was raped repeatedly in prison...he now has aids...

A man is walking alone in a park and stumbles upon a lamp. He rubs the lamp and a genie appears out of thin air. The genie tells him he has three wishes to wish for whatever his heart desires. The man naturally wishes for Anthony Davis to shave his damn unibrow. He then throws the lamp at a little boys face and laughs uncontrollably.

one day tiarnan got banged by a goat

A Black a Jew and a Pollack walk in to the bar bartender says "how may i help you gentlemen"

I am just trying to grasp the terms you use Nero, you are a genius, I mean I always heard about it, but honestly, well, my first impression of you here was... Different.

Why should this joke be funny? It shouldn't, because its an anti-joke.

Roses are red, Violets are PURPLE.

What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

Man I'm Bored Nice to meet you.

Two hunters are out in the woods when one of them collapses. He doesn't seem to be breathing and his eyes are glazed. The other guy whips out his phone and calls the emergency services. He gasps, "My friend is dead! What can I do?". The operator says "Calm down. I can help. First, let's make sure he's dead." There is a silence, then the man said "he has a pulse". The operator then calmly stated "we are sending a helicopter to air lift him out of there as we speak". The man got helicoptered to the nearest ER, and the doctors did their best to save him. He ended up having to go on life support for three years until his family members finally decided to pull the plug. The medical insurance didn't cover life support and the family went broke because of it.

guns don't kill people. casey anthoney kills people.

I dream of a world where chickens can cross the road without having their motives questioned

A horse walks into a bar. The bartender says "what'll it be?" The horse, unable to understand human language. Takes a shit and walks out.

Why does this dog have herpes? Global Warming.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, Cancer.

Why couldn't the mexican feed his family? Because a large percent of mexican immigrants in the United States do not have jobs due to dicrimination against illegal immigrants crossing the soutern border, thus rendering them more vunerable to unemployment is that is vastly present in the United States.

-Hey, Larry! How much is one plus one? -Two

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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