What's the difference between a dead dog in the road and a dead black guy in the road? It doesn't matter, I cried after both

thumb_up thumb_down -12

What's orange and sounds like a parrot? A carrot.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

A priest, a rabbi, and a minister are in a boat in the middle of the lake when a lightning bolt flashes out of the sky and hits them. Fortunately, no one died because only about 10% of those struck are killed.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Hey, I want to because you are really sweet and deserve it, and damn you are hot, but thats secondary in your case, in every case actually, otherwise I would just be doing it with meat whose soul and thoughts I hate/dislike/detest/etc, and that is not who I am. Once huh? I mean I said night/day/shower/breakfast table... Not so sure I can last for that long with a girl as hot and sweet as you for that long. Kidding, hey, best friend huh? Wow, I mean that`s really sweet, and you are really a special friend to me, but uh, to be honest, best friend? I barely know you... I hate this part of myself, I am blunt with that honesty thing, I may just have insulted you, but you know, I also need to be able to live with myself If I am going to enjoy life.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

What does a tree do all day? Boredom

thumb_up thumb_down -14

What did the say to the host of the pool party after he pooped? Mr. TImmons! There is chocolate in the pool!

thumb_up thumb_down -16

The man from Poland was so dumb he was eligible to live in a supervised group home.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

what do you call a black person in a electronic store? a customer

thumb_up thumb_down -18

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead.

thumb_up thumb_down -18

Boy: Doctor! Doctor! I can't see my arm! Doctor: It's because your blind son

thumb_up thumb_down -18

Knock knock. Who's there? The mailman. I don't believe you.

thumb_up thumb_down -18

what did you call a downer in the medieval times? spazalot

thumb_up thumb_down -18

why is 6 afraid of 7?? because 7 8 9

thumb_up thumb_down -20

Why couldn't Little Timmy see the pirate movie? Because Little Timmy was blind.

thumb_up thumb_down -24

a. get me a drink b. a would but but i got no arms

thumb_up thumb_down -30

Knock, knock. Who's there? Joke.

thumb_up thumb_down -32

Knock knock? Who's there? Madeline i am back!! :D

thumb_up thumb_down -112

What's worse then finding a repeated joke on antijokes? Finding a real joke.

thumb_up thumb_down +69

How do you realize your life is over? You don't, but the coroner does.

thumb_up thumb_down +55

What's black and white and red all over? A newspaper with some red stuff on it.

thumb_up thumb_down +49

Q: Why did the monkey climb a tree? A: To avoid predators.

thumb_up thumb_down +49

Why do black people eat so much fried chicken? Because it's delicious!

thumb_up thumb_down +49

What did the Ethiopian eat for dinner? Nothing

thumb_up thumb_down +47

A bar walks into a bar, it is then you realize you are in an alternate dimension.

thumb_up thumb_down +45

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops