I told my friend a joke. He didn't laugh, I asked why. He said he was autistic and he does not understand humor.

Did you hear the one about the blonde who went to the grocery store? She walked in, purchased the items that she specified on her shopping list, then left and went to her daughter's piano recital.

Oh, I must be hearing things.

What did the rape victim say to the rapist? "mmfff...mmm.....mmmmm"

Mitt Romney for president.

What do a grape and a spider have in common? Both have 8 legs..... Except for the grape.

What was the pirate's favorite letter? Q.

When life gives you lemons,you say thank you.

What is red and invisible? No tomatoes.

What's a golfer's favorite sandwich? Well, it depends on the golfer

There were 3 children: Flower, Petal and Fridge. Flower asked, "Mum, why is my name Flower?" to which she replied "Because a flower was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Petal asked, "Mum, why is my name Petal?" to which she replied "Because a petal was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Fridge said, "Herp derp dur" to which Fridge's mother replied "Shut up, Fridge."

I cut my pubes, Now they itch a lot.

Why couldn't the boy ride his bike? He had no legs. Why didn't he have any legs? He was hit by a truck.

A boy goes into Mourne View and meets a girl what happens next? He's now a father living off of the dole.

An Italian, a black man, and a small child walk into a bar. Shortly after it blew up due to a gas leak. 67 people perished.

Knock knock! Who's there? Dick! Dick who? Dick Stewart, your neighbor from next door!

Why is Obama's name Obama? Obama

Why did the man say how was your day? because it was the end of the day

Why was the man so unhappy. he died

Q: What is long and hard? A: The gun used to kill my parents.

What did the black man say to the jewish man? Hello.

A Jew, an Atheist, and a Muslim walk into a bar. They each drink a bottle, have a conversation, and leave.

why did i go on the rollercoaster? because there was a muffin on it

How many babies does it take to paint a house? Depends on how hard you throw them.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...