A man is driving home from work. he realizes he left his suitcase back at the office. he turns around and drives back to the office. he walks in the office and grabs his suitcase, and as he's walking out he's stopped by his boss. his boss simply asks "what are you doing in the office at this time, Eric?" the man replies to his boss " sorry sir i was just grabbing my suitcase as i forgot to bring it as i was leaving work" his boss lets him pass " okay Eric, have a good night" the man get back in his car and drives home. but on his way home a pedestrian runs in front of the road. the man runs him over unintentionly. the man is jailed with manslaughter for 4 and a half years

Roses are red Violets are blue I rhyme like lil Wayne Fridge

How do you wake up Lady Gaga? Drop a brick on her face.

i hate you.

boobs

A squirrel got killed by getting hit by a truck haha its funny cuz the squirrel died

why did the baby cross the road? i stapled his head to a chicken!

What did the robot do when a person was shot? Nothing, it wasn't programmed for that situation.

2 blonds are driving on the road on their way to Disney Land. They come to the sign that says Disney Land left so they started crying, turned around and went home.

How do you find Nemo? Watch the movie.

Which of the following is NOT true? A. The lemon is walking to a store. B. The store is walking to a lemon. C. The man is a lemon and a store. D. Peanuts are stuck in my anus

What do you call a black guy flying a plane. A pilot

What did the man say to his son? Hello, son.

What did the mushroom say to the pretty lady? Nothing, because it's a mushroom.

A Horse walks into a bar. Bartender:why the long face? Horse:I have terminal cancer.

The awkward moment when you notice its 2012 and we're all gonna die, so you buy and elephant and name him John.

The little mouse lifted the giant Elephant up so the Elephant could reach the bag of snacks, but then the Elephant said: I cant reach it, you must be tired so lets switch places... Squish: Squish! Elephant: Mouse! Where are you! *looks at "squish" NO! THIS WAS NOT THE WAY THE JOKE WAS SUPPOSED TO BE!!!!!!! Moral: Elephants cant talk...

Roses are Brown Violets are Brown I hate everyone on antijoke that steals what I write I fisted a cows butt hole.

Stop being racist!Be a panda. They are black white and asian!!!!

How can you tell if a woman is dead? She has no pulse.

dead babies

Teen pregnancy

How did the happy clown die? Testicular Cancer.

A tree walks into a bar. But it is a dead tree so it actually didn't

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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