As a wise man once told me... "natives."

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What do you call a red sore on your genitals? Herpes, probably.

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Why the worker did not come to work? Because he died!

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a blond, brunette, and red head run away from cops and hide in potato sacks. the officer went up to the brunette and kicked the potato bag and the brunette went "woof" "woof". the officer went to the red head and kicked the potato bag and the red head went "meow" "meow". the officer goes to the blond and kicked the potato bag and the blond went "potato".

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What did the husband tell his obese wife? I love you honey

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Wanna hear a joke? Me too.

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You say you can read me like a book, well the jokes on you. I am not a book.

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A horse walks into a bar. Bartender says, "Why the long face?" The horse does not respond because it is a horse. It can neither speak nor understand English. It is confused by it surroundings, and gallops out of the bar, knocking over a few tables.

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Why didn't the Mammoth go to school? Because his species went extinct before the development of organized education. And he's also a Mammoth.

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Q: What did the Goth-Punk girl write on her test for the question "What are three kinds of rock?" A: Igneous, Sedimentary, & Metamorphic, She is a 4.0 Geology Major attending a respectable University. She simply chooses to express herself through the musical and clothing trends that emerged in 1970's English underground music. In reality it her personal preferences in the aforementioned areas have no bearing on her intellectual or academic standing.

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How do you wake up Lady Gaga? Drop a brick on her face.

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A blonde walks into a store and asks for the microwave behind the counter. The man behind the register promptly hands her the microwave and charges her $435 for it, which is utterly ridiculous.

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hi

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suck my dick.

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What did the otter say to the pumpkin? I'm so glad I'm a walrus

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Why can't Ray Charles read? Because he's black.

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how many fish does it take to turn on a lightbulb None, lightbulbs dont work in the ocean

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What's the deal with airline food? It's nourishing matter that sustains life, provides energy, and promotes growth distributed by flight attendants.

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I avhe dyiaexls.

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Why did Rose throw the clock out the window? Because she's a moron.

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What do you call a jew with no money It doesn't really matter because all jews have money

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Jessica walks into a bar jokes jessica cant walk

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What is the difference between a Ferrari and a dead hooker? One is a car and one is a human being.

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Nah

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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