Whats worst then the Holocaust? Two holocaust's.

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What's white and sticky? Glue

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How are a plum and a rabbit alike? Theyre both purple except for the rabbit.

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Fuck her

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What do a grape and a spider have in common? Both have 8 legs..... Except for the grape.

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What is black and hangs from a tree in my backyard? My neighbors children.

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What did the boy with cancer get for christmas? -A haircut

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Shit I forgot to put the slash. Thang god for google

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Why did the koala fall out of the tree? It was dead.

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Women's rights.

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How do you make a blond cry? Rape her

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Q:whats the diffrence between a mexican and a deer A:one is a mexican and the other one is a deer

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Like this joke

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How can you tell you're in a childrens' ambulance from the inside? From the clown patterned body bags.

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HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

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Fuzzy wuzzy was a bear, fuzzy wuzzy had no hair, fuzzy wuzzy had cancerand died

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What did the frog say to the beautiful sleeping princess? Ribbit

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Freddie Mercurys teeth

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What is red and invisible? No tomatoes.

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Three men are stranded, mid-ocean, in a small rowboat. They realize quickly that their imminent demise is slowly creeping into the forefront of their consciousnesses. Just as all hope seem to be lost, one man noticed an island covered in luscious foliage about five hundred yards away. A problem reared it's head as it became apparent that an unrelenting riptide was dragging the boat further and further from the shore and, in turn, salvation. It became further apparent that the men would have to abandon their rickety rowboat and swim the rest of the way. The first man bravely jumps into the vast uncertainty of the ocean and attempts to swim to shore. He is met by a large shark that promptly severs his arm from his body. A bloody mess, he manages to touch down on the sandy beach. The second man, more reluctantly, also jumps in. He balanced his chances: "100% death in the boat vs. uncertainty in the ocean." Like the first man, the second man meets the shark's vicious bite. His leg is severed and he too drags himself, bloody, to the warm embrace of sand and freedom. The third man, sure that he would be bitten also, jumps into the ocean and swims to shore. Alas! The third man arrived on the island unscathed and completely fine. Perplexed, the first two men asked the third why the shark did not attack him. The third man simply smiled and replied..."what do you expect me for, a typewriter?"

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't, it got hit by a car.

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what do you do when you see a 40 ft tall gorilla? WHO CARES, RUN!

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What did Jesus say to the Easter Rabbit? Nothing, it ran off before he could say anything. They're so skiddish, those pesky rabbits...

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Why couldn't the little boy see anything? It was dark outside.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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