- Anti Joke

How do you know when there's a terrorist in an airport? There's a camel in the parking lot.

2 blonds are driving on the road on their way to Disney Land. They come to the sign that says Disney Land left so they started crying, turned around and went home.

why didnt the dog bark? he died in his sleep

whats the differnce between a baby and a dart board? dart boards dont bleed.

What do you call a black guy flying a plane. A pilot

What did the man say to his son? Hello, son.

What's funnier than a dead baby? A lot of things. Dead babies are not funny.

Whats green and fuzzy, and if it falls out of a tree you'll die? A pool table.

A man walks into a bar, then he realized he didn't have any money, so he walked out.

Knock Knock Who's there? Nobody. Go make some friends.

A Horse walks into a bar. Bartender:why the long face? Horse:I have terminal cancer.

When life gives you lemons, make a lemon and tamarind chutney.

A man walks into a bar. End of story.

What's the difference between a watermelon and a baby? A watermelon is edible.

A tree walks into a bar. But it is a dead tree so it actually didn't

A black man and a Mexican are hired as day laborers by a white man. The black man cleans the house while the Mexican mows and trims the yard. Both are hard-working and attempting to provide for their families in a down economy.

What's red and invisible? No tomatoes.

A piece of rope walks into a bar, and asks for a beer. The bartender says, "Sorry, we don't serve ropes here." The rope goes into the bathroom, ties himself into a knot, then rubs himself against the walls until his ends are ragged. Then he walks out and says to the bartender: "I'm a frayed knot." The bartender replies, "Right, I see that you've tied yourself into a knot and frayed your ends. So what? What are you trying to prove?" "Well, I...I mean, it was supposed to be a pun, and you were supposed to react like...like it was..." "Look, I thought I was doing you something nice by letting you use the restroom, even though I told you we don't serve ropes here. And then you go in there and rub yourself against the walls or some crazy shit, and probably get them all dirty, and you come out and expect I'm going to give you a drink because of a pun? Is that how you think this works? Get out of my bar before I call the police." The rope slinks out, still tied in a knot, and eventually finds somebody willing to buy a bottle of cheap vodka for him at a liquor store. He never sets foot in the bar again.

There was a man who had a camel, but one day he lost his camel. He wanted to go and look for it but he couldnt because he had to go to work. So the next morning he went to look for his camel. He went over the road and saw a gate, but he couldnt through because he had to go to work. The next morning he went over the road, through the gate and saw a forest, but he couldnt through because he had to go to work. The next morning he went over the road, through the gate, through the forest and saw a hill,but he couldnt go down the hill because he had to go to work. The next morning he went over the road, through the gate, through the forest,over the hill and saw a river,but he couldnt go over the river because he had to go to work. The next morning he went over the road, through the gate, through the forest,over the hill, over the river and saw a house, but he couldnt go to the house because he had to go to work. The next morning he went over the road, through the gate, through the forest,over the hill, over the river, to the house and saw a door, but he couldnt knock on the door because he had to go to work. The next morning he went over the road, through the gate, through the forest,over the hill, over the river, to the house, knocked on the door, and saw a man, but he couldnt speak to the man because he had to go to work. The next morning he went over the road, through the gate, through the forest,over the hill, over the river, to the house, knocked on the door, saw a man, and asked the man, "have you seen my camel?", but the man couldnt respond because he had to go to work The next morning he went over the road, through the gate, through the forest,over the hill, over the river, to the house, knocked on the door, saw a man, and asked the man, "have you seen my camel?", and the man said, "no"

Q: What's black and blue and red all over? A: I'm not sure. If it's red all over, it's not going to be black or blue.

What do you call a douche with no arms or legs? A device for washing out the vagina as a contraceptive measure.

What's worse than a School Bus accident? The Holocaust.

Why was the panda sad? It's family died when China had an earthquake.

how do you stop a speeding car? Put your foot on the brake

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK! Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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