Two friends not to far apart: A: Hey you, you hear me?! B: yes. A: You hear me?! B: yes!! A: You hear me?! B: yes, yes, what!?! A: You hear me?! B: YEEEEEEEES WHAT'S going on?!?! (gets upset) A: Nothing, I'm just checking your hearing.

NEVER

How many jews does it take to change a light bulb? over 100

A man is walking alone in a park and stumbles upon a lamp. He rubs the lamp and a genie appears out of thin air. The genie tells him he has three wishes to wish for whatever his heart desires. The man naturally wishes for Anthony Davis to shave his damn unibrow. He then throws the lamp at a little boys face and laughs uncontrollably.

What did the passive-aggressive woman do to her husband? She killed him. As it turns out, the slight passive-aggressive behavior she was showing was actually an early sign of a dangerous sociopathic mental disorder. The authorities are looking for her as we speak.

Did you know Dr Pepper isn't really a doctor?

Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a loaf of bread.

What's red and green? A frog in a blender

Hey what time is it. 3:15

What did the Irisman say to the bartender? Don't know? i don't speak Irish?

That's a lie, buffaloes are extinct now

"knock knock" "who's there" nobody answered cus it was a bunch of little shits playing knock a door run

Knock, Knock. Who's there? Doctor. Doctor Who, Your Doctor, you have 5 months to live

American Idol

Roses are red. Violets are blue. I have Alzheimer's. Where are the keys?

What do you call a female duck? A duck.

Why is ya dad ya dad? ........ because of ya cousin

A woman refuses to make a sandwich and walks away unharmed.

What is red and invisible? No tomatoes.

What are the things that define you? The things that define you.

Man I'm Bored Nice to meet you.

Disregard Females, Acquire Currency.

Knock knock. Who's there? The police. We have reason to believe you are hiding large amounts of narcotics in your residence and have obtained a search warrant for the premises. Open the door or we will be required to use forceful means of entry.

What happened? I have absolutely no idea.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...